On Puns and the Degenerative State of Mankind

An essay by famed essayist, Dr. Cheese.

Billy and his friends were all having a fun time, talking and laughing about old times. That's when pathetic Pete, neighborhood fool, came around. "You know what, Billy," he said, "I think you're a real motherfisher. Get it? It's a pun!"

 

And then there was silence.

 

We've all seen the scene a thousand times before. Somebody tries to be funny, somebody tries to gain acceptance in a group, and out slips a pun (or something similar to a pun, but not quite, such as 'motherfisher.')

 

Puns.

 

They happen all the time on the shady corners of the internet. It's becoming an epidemic. Bad jokes are spreading to every orifice of society.

 

As the Official Writerscafe Administrator, it falls on my shoulders to do something about this. It is my responsibility, my duty, to try to curb the damage before all is lost. Therefore, I have reluctantly decreed that anyone who tries to pass bad puns off as humor on this site are to be punished by means of police tazer until they are deemed rehabilitated to enter society.

 

I know it seems drastic, but I guess you could say that the amount of people who find the misuse of puns funny to be rather... Shocking.

 

Haha! Get it? It's a pun! Hehehe!

I'm a funny, funny guy.

 

 

Seriously though, puns kill people. Don't use puns.

Author's Note

I've been called a motherfisher once.
It never stops hurting.

Reviews

[lark]

puns don't kill people, it's...


(sorry--failing to make a joke out of that one...)

[Hedra Helix]

what to even say to that? your skills you are reducing to jello my fine mutherfishering fellow, dont spread such cheese, you are too gouda for that crap, respect the craft, Dr Cheese.
On that note I am about to challenge you for my own needs, I will now transfer over to PM...