Redondo Beach

Got some bad new the other day---

Redondo Beach

I went to the beach today

The sun baptized my body

Wind baptized my soul

The roar of the ocean soothed my troubled mind

The thunder of the giant aquatic finger tips

Slamming into the Redondo sand

The mixing of the water and sand

Forces me to think about Jay

My friend

My brother in Christ

He called me two days ago

Past a night

Told me he had the HIV

Shocked

We talked

Then prayed

Like many times before

Hungry

Homeless

Angry

Poor

Since being out west

I have been touched by life

In the garden state I only knew:

Grilled chicken

Soft Ice cream

And the five O’clock new

 

I grit my teeth for Jay

He’s lived such a f*****g hard life!

I have lived such a f*****g hard life!

I slowly anger toward God

But remember he did nothing

Yet he is Everything.

The devil has a megaphone

planted in my right ear.

And for all those who said it could be worst

I wish a slowly painful day

 

A volleyball game snaps me to reality

Breaks me from my funk

I jump into the ocean

And rinse the self pity from

My carcass

And battle the waves

As I wonder

How many people

Pissed in this water?

Reviews

[razormuse]

Amazingly complex write. Emotions are so raw & real I could feel your pain, anger then ultimately humor albeit dark "How many people Pissed in this water?" I don't like to assume all Poems are personal accounts, sometimes I write about events that never happened but yet have touched me. I really liked this.

[Nath]

They say the sea is a good place to think things through andyou skillfully entwined your pondering the harsh reality of life with a very realistic description of the ocean - beautiful as it is, and as much as the water may be capable of cleansing, you come up with doubts on the true purging effect of naturally polluted water.
Sometimes life is not easy, sometimes it gets majorly messed up. A great reflection on how unfair some awful events can be and an amazing poem.

[Ruth]

So moving! I am so sorry for your bad news also love!
This reels it all, the sadness, anger, unforgiving threads of life...
And even the waves hold no clarity!
Great poem xoxo

[Dayran]

A mood that even the beach and the sun cannot overcome is a mood that has lived a life on the beach before. Perhaps in equally difficult times if not more.

[Barbara Walker]

Your words flowed with a harsh reality-life! Some people have a great life through plan, some thru luck, some, no matter how they try, it just doesn't come together, it's like a black cloud over them, much of the time. I am so sorry your friend has HIV and homelessness, yeah, I've been there...an awful place to be, with no place. And even harder to get out of it. Loved that last line! Even the beautiful water has an undercurrent (no pun intended) of horror.

[Droll Prole]

I like the references to the sea here, when confronted with the hardness of life one can take solace in nature and the elements.

[Leslie Philibert]

I like this, the way you are so true to your friend ( he will need your help) and then the way you write in the last verse, and rinse the self pity from my carcass. This is in my judgement the best line, don`t feel bad with him but feel good with him and give him hope and fun back, with the right medicine he will be fine.It might be worth trying to edit the last line, that somehow weakens the message and gets back to negativity. Good work.

[The Random Writings Of ..]

I love the reality of this piece, it is so real, there is no fluff as they call it. It speaks on a level of true reality. The troubled mind and of a friend going through something so life altering that no one can understand, can this be worse? I have to ponder that question. I have a find who is HIV positive and everyday I worry and wonder why God had this plan in place for him, but we can't a;ways find answers for that.
You have stepped out of your comfort zone to of a place far away from the only thing you only knew, and then when you realized your thinking was to much your reality snapped you back into reality. I really like this, because I can relate to that. The last part of you wondering "how many people have pissed in this water", totally off left field but so true to a real thought.
Well written - real, raw, and honest. Thank you for sharing.

[Corset]

lol, I love the "zinger" ending, schools of fish, animals and people have pissed in that water.

[Poetic Beauty]

Reality is.sour.sometimes there.are.difficult struggles amd.then some more get.piled on. Anger is strong mixed with confusion amd sorrow. Clear portrayal of how life really cam be

[Sagar Waingankar]

It is much true and reflects like a series of emotional structure being harassed!