Relative Weather

Does no one else feel it?

My lungs failed me in this manic Sea of Uncertainty

As the seagull serenely floated by

My soul was soaked by this tumultuous Downfall of Sorrow

Yet the stag and the doe remained dry

My hair was tangled in this howling Wind of Devastation 

But the wren had not lost one feather

While the universe harmonized with nature

I was murdered by my relative weather

Author's Note

Original photo: http://www.acclaimimages.com/_gallery/_free_images/0124-0610-2618-3229_tropical_storm_chris_o.jpg

Reviews

[FIN]

I can feel the relation (or connection) between our two poems; both expressing the same level of awareness to ones inner workings and outer surroundings.

Good-eye.

I very much enjoyed this; the calmness and harmony of nature and chaos within our inner selves were well expressed and nicely juxtaposed.

Well written, philosophical piece.

Much love,

LR

[Cobblestone Traveler]

Thank you so much! I appreciate you taking the time to read.

[B]

this is so cool by the way

[Cobblestone Traveler]

Thanks! :)

[Richard🖌]

Well,
I read through several of your pieces before settling on this one to review, and I did so because, not only is it well-penned, contains originality, its syntax reads with appeal and ease, it is metaphorically interesting to grasp, feels legitimate to its author's actual emotions, is uncontrived nor forced in its flow, rhythm, and rhyme … good poetry in my mind's-eye.
Another reason it (actually) chose me, is due to how very much it relates to me in those times I felt much the same, and no one gave a damn about me, either, or seemed not to.

Yes, I definitely feel it, or have. A simple/not so simple work, eh?
A bushel basket of thanks for sharing a real poem with genuinely felt meaning! ⁓ Richard

[Cobblestone Traveler]

Very flattering words, Richard, and I thank you! I am glad you enjoyed it.

[Richard🖌]

Ya betcha!

[Dajena]

Excellent metaphors! Love the photo too. It pictures well that ongoing weather forecasted by our life's choices inside of us.

[Cobblestone Traveler]

I appreciate your kind review!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

love the last two lines---

i like the analogies, and the idea that comes to me....we suffer our own pain...others live on not really noticing...life is as usual...

and to be murdered by our own weather...the storms of rage, the tears of pain....the hurricanes of heartbreak...yes.

j.

[Cobblestone Traveler]

Thank you so much for your perceptive review and for grasping the full message.

[GalaxyGhost]

Well I just love the personification of the Sea and the wind and it makes the whole poem so picturesque that it just brings up the whole beauty of the poem entirely. I really love this poem and I think it's great!

[Cobblestone Traveler]

Thank you so much! I really appreciate it!

[Shabeeh Haider]

This is beautiful. The imagery is exceptional.
Well done my friend.

[Cobblestone Traveler]

Thank you so much for your kind review!

[Nisreen]

I see so much in your words
And I feel great reluctance to speak of it
In fear of sounding extremely bizarre
But I see a lot

[Cobblestone Traveler]

Thank you for stopping by. I would always accept bizarre!!

[Nisreen]

I guess you face this time in your life
Where you don't know what is next ..... Mixed emotions
Is it anger or excitement or restlessness
Seems to me like after this step nothing will be the same

[Cobblestone Traveler]

I'm intrigued by your takeaway. Indeed it is a cocktail of mixed emotions, wondering why something so truly devastating to yourself does not seem to be affecting the rest of the universe. You question your strength and endurance.

[Nisreen]

I guess people have different ways of viewing emotions and reacting to it
Some may seem cold but cry a river inside
I enjoy your work