Matthew the Mighty Pimp King

A boy becomes a king. Not just any king. A Pimp King.

Matt The Mighty Pimp King


Once upon a time, in a kingdom far away, there was a young boy named Matthew who became the king at the age of 10. Despite his young age, he was not just any ordinary king. He was a pimp king who loved to boss around his b*****s and make them do his bidding.

Matthew had a passion for luxury and he had a brand new Cadillac that he loved to be driven around in. He would often sit in the back seat with a scowl on his face, barking orders at his b*****s. Even so, he was adored by his hoes.

Matthew put his b*****s to work on the streets and bringing him the profits. The king demanded only the best and was not satisfied with just any hoe. He demanded is girls find the best hoes in all the land.

His hoes worked hard searching his kingdom day and night looking for that magic coochie and putting it to work. But when they would bring the profits to the King, they often fell short of his expectations and In a fit of rage, Matthew would punish his b*****s and hoes with a slap from his mighty pimp hand.

"Where's my money at!" He would exclaim.

This pattern continued for weeks, with the king growing increasingly angry with each passing day. Even though his b*****s adored him, they lived in fear of their king and the punishment they would receive if they didn't bring in enough money.

But one day, one of the b*****s, a young girl named, Laquisha decided she had enough. She refused to be afraid of the King anymore and stood up to him. "Daddy, you're not being fair! This is unjust!" Matthew slapped that b***h so hard she immediately apologized for her disrespect and begged for forgiveness. After a moment of thought, the king realized that happy b*****s make more money. He made Laquisha his bottom b***h and put her over all the other b*****s and hoes.

From that day on, The Laquisha dared another b***h to question the kings rule. "This isn't a union. If you want Daddy to be happy, get off your butts and get to work" she said. "In return, Daddy has decided to give you every other Sunday off, medical and dental". The money rolled in under Laquisha's rule as bottom b***h and now the pimp king's b*****s were happy and proud to serve him.

The young pimp king learned the value of keeping his b*****s happy. And so, the story of the young pimp king named Matthew, who rode in a Cadillac, became a pimping tale of redemption, transformation and how not to get messed up by that mighty pimp hand.

THE END

Author's Note

Ion actually wrote this for my son Matthew. He’s 29 now but I couldn’t help remember the troublesome 10 year old I raised. so that’s why he’s 10 in the story.