The Warmth

Written for "The Weeping Willow Cries" contest. Inspired by Porcupine Tree and the urge for a change of scenery.

        

Arriving somewhere but not here,

I gaze at the woodland paths and butterflies,

Never in my life did I think I'd ride the back of a deer

Leaping over logs and bushes �" how time flies.

 

It was not an open car in which I travelled;

That too, is another lost dream,

But in a carriage of the trains that glide past this land unravelled,

Like a shining light, the speed of light, a sunbeam.

 

I feel like Lazarus, discovering pastures new,

I have a halo round my head, I cannot be touched,

But then I see a weeping willow crying the colours green and blue,

And I hear the glass arm shattering, this paradise in my hand I clutch.

 

But wait, could this be the start of something beautiful?

The stars are fading as the night draws darker,

Everything from a few hours ago is slipping away so quickly,

The trees strip bare, the leaves float away, the water suffers drought �" starker.

 

A splodge of reality smudges this painting

And surrealism gets the better of me:

The warmth from my portable heater turns off

And I am alone again in my cold room �" what was could never be.

 

At least I am still breathing.

 

Reviews

[~Mary Ann~]

What a beautiful painting of words... the mind can allow us to traevel where we want and whenever we want to. I love the imagery in your piece along with the wistfulness of the daydreamer... when they left the surreal and returned to reality.

On another thought... that was how we were back in the day... before our growth and expansion...
Now things are a bit different.. and beautiful sceneries like the one described above could become nothing but a daydream.. if we don't do something soon... and keep our world a healthy place. :)

A beautiful piece.. :)

[barbara k]

Anything relating to Porcupine Tree suits my fancy :) Very cool

[JohnL]

Weeping willows are such graceful trees (I too entered that contest) and carry so many messages of peace and comfort. Your beautiful piece brings to mind the wonderful Psalm 137:

"By the rivers of Babylon, there we sat down, yea, we wept, when we remembered Zion.
We hanged our harps upon the willows in the midst thereof.
For there they that carried us away captive required of us a song; and they that wasted us required of us mirth, saying, Sing us one of the songs of Zion.
How shall we sing the LORD's song in a strange land?"

I have walked by so many rivers and been transported not by my steps alone, but by the wind-song of the trees. So, your poem transported me to places totally within my imagination - joyful places, sad places, pensive places and private places. On occasions, I too have returned to a cold, dark room - only to remember - "There are more willows, more journeys, and we and the willows will not always weep. Thank you for the thoughts your poem has generated.
JohnL

[R J Askew]

I think the first three verses are the best. 'Never in my life did I think I'd ride the back of a deer' -- I likes. 'it was not an open car in which I travelled' -- likes. Cld be the opening line of a novel. Ach, what am I saying! It wld be wasted there and is in just the right place as the opening line of a verse. Sod all novelists! Gimme poets! 'I have a halo round my head...' -- I likes. '...I hear the glass arm shattering...' -- I loves that. Those lines excite me. If there is just one exciting line in a poem I am happy.

[Kenna]

Your imagery's great - I could picture everything I was reading.
Nice job on the rhyme scheme as well; that's hard for me to do in my own poems.
Great write! :)

[Angel's Lady]

oh, how very beautiful! Ohhhh...you are so very delightful. Great write, dear one!

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

This is such a beautiful and tranquil write... the journey of the mind when life is stale can help the soul find the true meaning of self worth.

[just is]

I could feel the emotion in this
this is well written. Thank you for entering.

[CourtNny]

Nice write! I liked this a lot! It flowed well and, yea, you could tell the rhyme was forced a bit but that didn't stand out too much [in my opinion] and that didn't ruin it at all. I really liked the ending.

Oh how bitter and bare life seems to be at times but getting lost in ones dreams every now and then can keep us sane. 'They say I'm a dreamer but I'm not the only one.'