At around 1am, I heard a low moaning noise coming from outside. I immediately recognized it as one of two things: the sound of my hick neighbors having sweet, sweet sex in the middle of my yard (again. That's a story for another time), or a cat's warning/hurt sound. I live on a dirt, dead-end road on the outskirts of a town of 500, meaning there are coyotes, raccoons, wolves, dirty hillbillies, bears, and about a million stray cats. It's not uncommon for any of those predators to fight amongst themselves.
I knew that one of my cats--Baby, who's almost as old as I am--was outside, so as soon as I heard the noise, I launched myself out of bed. I grabbed an electric lantern from my bedside table, put on my glasses, and sprinted outside. I paused, squinting against the shadows, and listened for the noise again. After hearing nothing, I quietly stepped off the deck and looked around the yard. I did a double-take every time I saw a leaf or dog toy. I almost peed when I stepped near a bird, stirring it into flight. Approximately two thousand moths danced around my light.
I almost regretted bringing the lantern; it just attracted bugs. With how pale I was, I was sure my skin could illuminate half the yard on its own.
Mroooouhnnn
Following the noise, I turned east and jogged forward. In the dark, I could make out two small shapes. When I got close enough, I held up the lantern. Closest to me was a large, skinny orange cat: Baby, fur standing on end and tail hung low. About fifteen feet away, near the edge of the woods, was a smaller gray cat, crouched low to the ground. The two cats stayed still as statues as I approached. I slowly crept over and crouched next to Baby, making sure not to spook either cat. The gray one meowed, and he had the high, light voice of a kitten.
I looked at him. He was either an abnormally small cat or a few-month-old kitten. My thought process did a one-eighty. Initially, I thought I was breaking up a cat fight, but it now seemed that a kitten had strayed too far and ended up in Baby's territory. The little guy probably didn't understand what was happening and was scared. Baby saw a potential threat and was just protecting his turf.
The little guy reminded me of a cat named Tiger I had maybe seven years ago. Tiger was only a few months old, but he was very small for his age. He went missing one night and never returned. I never had to wonder what became of him.
With slow, obvious motions, I shifted the lantern to my left hand and put my right arm around Baby, picking him up. As I brought him into the house, I felt like a soccer mom embarrassing her kid. I imagined the kitten making funny faces at Baby as I took him away.
I opened the door, and Baby hobbled his way inside. He was pretty spry for his age; he only occasionally needed a hit from his inhaler, and he was just as limber as the day he was born--a fact that makes him quite popular with the lady cats.
Normally, I would have gone back inside and left the cat alone, but the memory of Tiger made me sentimental. Moving quietIy and slowly, I went back to the kitten. He hadn't moved an inch. He watched me carefully, but he didn't seem afraid of people. It's possible he thought I was a large, albino cat myself, but I figured he was a neighbor's cat that wandered away from home. I edged closer to him and held out my hand. Still a few inches away, the cat sniffed the air around my fingers.
He took a few slow steps forward, not toward me but toward the house. Once he passed me, he squatted and pushed a thick, stinky t**d out of his neon pink rear. Perhaps this action was a way of asserting his dominance over me. He kicked his feet like he was covering his nugget with litter, but he only managed to rustle the grass. His posture relaxed and he picked up his pace. He looked under the deck and sniffed around some empty bins. I watched him for a while. There were so many things I wanted to do--adopt him, take him to the neighbors and see if he was their cat, give him a funny name and teach him to tap dance--but I worried that approaching him would scare him and make him run, possibly dropping more stinky nuggets in the process. I figured the best thing to do would be to let him take care of himself. Cats come and go all the time, and they always seem to do fine on their own. All the same, I worried one of many wildlife threats would find him. Perhaps it would be that God-forsaken owl that loves keeping me up at night.
I stayed and watched as he poked around under the deck. I would have liked to stay out longer, but I already had close to a dozen bug bites all over my body; in my hurry to investigate the noise, I hadn't put on a shirt, so my bony back, shapeless stomach, and hairy chest were fair game for any insects looking for a midnight snack. In fact, just as I was thinking of leaving, a mosquito clamped down on my right n****e. He locked eyes with me and did a jig with his eyebrows. I may or may not have felt some tongue. I blew on him, and he took off.
Finally, I turned off my lantern. With the light gone, I couldn't make out the kitten or anything else underneath the deck. I went inside for the night.
Just a little something I experienced last night. Since this is such a brief, simple story, I experimented with a different writing style. Feel free to comment on anything you want.
My Review
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I had a good chuckle in that first paragraph and you maintained the humour very well throughout, given the simple subject matter.
Like some reviewers below, i thought the story might be taking a twist....that the kitten was a ghost of the one you lost in the past. Many of your stories do take a twisty path to their conclusion after all.
Either way, i enjoyed the story. Vivid description and well written as always. Well Done.
Posted 7 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
7 Years Ago
Had this story been ficticious, there probably would have been some sort of twist. But my real life .. read moreHad this story been ficticious, there probably would have been some sort of twist. But my real life isn't so interesting. As always, I appreciate you reading and leaving your thoughts.
Tongue? From a mosquito?! That is the funniest damn thing I've read in some time. I needed that today as I sit in these hard chairs I the surgery waiting room. The whole piece is funny as your self deprecating style is one I enjoy and use myself from time to time. Thank you so much for this.
Posted 7 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
7 Years Ago
I'm glad I could amuse you. Surgery, huh? I've had a couple bad experiences with them myself, so I'm.. read moreI'm glad I could amuse you. Surgery, huh? I've had a couple bad experiences with them myself, so I'm hoping you fair better than I did. Thank YOU for reading.
I had a good chuckle in that first paragraph and you maintained the humour very well throughout, given the simple subject matter.
Like some reviewers below, i thought the story might be taking a twist....that the kitten was a ghost of the one you lost in the past. Many of your stories do take a twisty path to their conclusion after all.
Either way, i enjoyed the story. Vivid description and well written as always. Well Done.
Posted 7 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
7 Years Ago
Had this story been ficticious, there probably would have been some sort of twist. But my real life .. read moreHad this story been ficticious, there probably would have been some sort of twist. But my real life isn't so interesting. As always, I appreciate you reading and leaving your thoughts.
Good story Clifford. I enjoyed the humor and descriptions you used for your tale.You took an every day occurrence and turned it into an interesting story. The simple happenings in life give us a multitude of opportunities for creative writing. Keep up the good work.
Richie b.
Posted 7 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
7 Years Ago
I'm glad you enjoyed this vignette and my attempts at making it interesting. Thank you for reading, .. read moreI'm glad you enjoyed this vignette and my attempts at making it interesting. Thank you for reading, Richie.
I can safely say this is the first cat story I read here, which makes me very happy to be honest. Not to sound like the Grinch but it gets hard to review heart felt poems all the time... And its with great excitment that I read "random" short stories about "random" subjects.
Amber beat me to it in her review, but its true, I also expected a horror story by the begining but I wasnt let down by what I encountered in the end.
I enjoyed your writting and I liked your description about how white he was tha he could iluminated the whole way by himself with out the lantern, that made me giggle.
It seems sucha simple story but int he end I read it and I wanting more. So I guess you done a wonderfull job.
Thank you Clifford!
Posted 8 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
8 Years Ago
Long time no see!
I very much agree with you about reading nothing but heartfelt poem.. read moreLong time no see!
I very much agree with you about reading nothing but heartfelt poems. I'm very glad you appreciated my unexpected little tale, and I'm happier still that my attempts at humor came across.
Ha! At first I expected a horror story with the ominous title and the dark picture, but then I read a story about cats. Which is just as great, because cats are amazing. I loved the writing style you used here, I can tell that this is something that actually happened to you, because of the tone in your writing. This piece shows off a lot of your personality. Aside from telling us that you like cats, it also shows us that you have a good sense of humor. Great work here :)
Posted 8 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
8 Years Ago
Thank you, Amber! I could see how you would get the impression this is a horror story, haha. I'm gla.. read moreThank you, Amber! I could see how you would get the impression this is a horror story, haha. I'm glad you liked the story and the humorous style I took with it.
This is a brilliant, uninhibited sharing of real life. This is the kind of impromptu story that beats the hell out of artificially pumped-up drama of so-called "reality TV" . . . and I love the idea of capturing these late night encounters with various wild things in the night (I've done a few myself). You've done a great job of self-observations, including tons of details about everything going on around you, everything you're feeling, what's being done to you in the night (unfortunately bites & not the loving kind), & truly loveable guesses at whatever the animals are thinking & doing. I vote that we bring back the true vignettes of our everyday lives & share them like this often! *smile*
Posted 8 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
8 Years Ago
I think I could write an entire book with just these kinds of late-night encounters--I have plenty! .. read moreI think I could write an entire book with just these kinds of late-night encounters--I have plenty! I'm glad you enjoyed the writing style, and thanks for sharing your thoughts.
I really enjoyed this. I like the writing style that you used. It reminds me of being a little laid back, but also I read it with a slight dramatic tone. It is kind of sad that the kitten was gone the next morning, especially because it reminded you of another cat that you once had.
Posted 8 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
8 Years Ago
I suppose you're right about the "laid back... slight dramatic tone". This was supposed to be a laid.. read moreI suppose you're right about the "laid back... slight dramatic tone". This was supposed to be a laid back story, but my innate dramatic side showed a bit, I guess, haha. Yes, it was kinda sad the kitten was gone, but it was for the best. I have six cats and five dogs--I don't have much room for a new addition. Thanks for reading, Deana.
you have a keen eye for details and as always your descriptions are really good. a mundane event turned into a sort of painting. this little piece is not devoid of humour either. tap dance! haha
good little one, liff.
Posted 8 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
8 Years Ago
Thank you, Woody. I try with the details. When I first wrote this, it had quite a bit less humor. Th.. read moreThank you, Woody. I try with the details. When I first wrote this, it had quite a bit less humor. Then S. Mi suggested I balance out the humor, and this story is the end result.
'give him a funny name and teach him to tap dance'
That caught me by surprise, made me smile.
Very short, very simple. Very realistic.
Quite nice.
Feels like a well written diary entry.
Thanks for sharing.
Posted 8 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
8 Years Ago
Thanks, LM. I'm glad you appreciate my attempt at taking a fairly mundane experience and giving it a.. read moreThanks, LM. I'm glad you appreciate my attempt at taking a fairly mundane experience and giving it a humorous twist.
Thank you, my Cafe family, for all that you have done for me. This has been a wonderful period of my life. If any of you ever want to reach me, feel free to send me an email at [email protected]... more..