The Crash (Poem)

The Crash (Poem)

A Poem by Jacob Clifford

The glass leaves his grasp, shattering across the kitchen floor;

the wife freezes, teeth squeezing thin lips;

The young boy drops his jaw, bruised eyes darting to the door;

The husband sighs, pushes back his chair, his hands on hips.

 

With familiar motions, the man removes his belt.

The woman buries her face in scarred hands;

The boy's hands cover his face, hiding yesterday's welt;

The husband closes the distance, conjuring plans.

 

His belt whips forward, the crack like lightning.

The boy's cries ring out, piercing the night.

Crack! Crack! Crack! for eternity the blows keep heightening.

Waves of defeat roll off the boy, mingling with his fright.

© 2017 Jacob Clifford


Author's Note

Jacob Clifford
This is kind of a dark and unpleasant topic, I realize. Tell me what you think. Advice and thoughts are welcome, as always.

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AE
I like how this is a story, but it still has a rhyming scheme. It's interesting how in the first stanza, you know the kid slipped up, broke the glass, oops. Then in the second stanza, you start to get cautious and worried and you can feel the fear start to creep up on you. Then it sucked (not the poem, because I really like the poem). I didn't expect for it to be like that. I actually winced because I've felt the crack of a belt before and the immediate fear when you see it, then that lingering feeling afterword when you walk off feeling defeated.

Posted 8 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Jacob Clifford

8 Years Ago

Thank you so much! That's exactly what I was going for: that creeping fear. That's a good point you .. read more



Reviews

This is so sad! It's so terrible what happens to some kids.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Jacob Clifford

8 Years Ago

It is very terrible. Thank you for reading, Hannah.
Such a terrifying scene you paint here. Vivid and intense imagery. It is a shame domestic abuse and child abuse still exist in our world. The rhyming is good, but not sure I can say I enjoyed the content. Lydi*

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Jacob Clifford

8 Years Ago

Thank you for reading.
This is a really nice poem and i liked the way you narrated beautiful things in this poem...Keep on Writing..

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Jacob Clifford

8 Years Ago

I'm glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for reading.
This work really instills a sense of growing fear for the boy. You feel it getting closer and closer. I feel so much for this poor boy. The imagery is VERY vivid, which is what I think makes writing really great, putting your reader in the situation itself. I really felt fear reading it, waiting for that inevitable whip. Sad, but beautiful poem...

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Jacob Clifford

8 Years Ago

That approaching fear is what I had in mind when I wrote this; I'm glad it comes across. Thank you f.. read more
M. L. F.

8 Years Ago

You're welcome.
a domestic disturbance that leaves the trace of welts, of disappointment when a loved one hurts us

steph

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Jacob Clifford

8 Years Ago

Very much so. Thank you for reading.
highonwords

8 Years Ago

you're welcome :)

steph
I come from a family where the belt was used and although not quite to this extent I did learn a valuable lesson - you should never spank, hit, whip (whatever it may be) a child in anger. Discipline them yes, but bully and hurt because you're bigger than them no! Some adults just can't control their anger and it's extremely frightening for a child - you portrayed that fear very well.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Jacob Clifford

8 Years Ago

I wholeheartedly agree with you, Carolynn. It's such a terrible things the "adults" decide to do. Th.. read more
The title is interesting. I sometimes dislike when people equate abuse with an accident. But I feel like in this piece, The Crash is from the point of view of the narrator, who is powerless to intervene. So in this case, it makes a lot of sense.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Jacob Clifford

8 Years Ago

I see what you mean. What I meant about not needing to apologize was more that I wouldn't take offen.. read more
Shannon

8 Years Ago

Of course. I love discussion as much as reading and writing. I would send you a read request, but I.. read more
Jacob Clifford

8 Years Ago

I used to have that problem! It was very annoying and quite a hindrance. If you ever want me to read.. read more
I think it's more sad than dark. You paint the actions as a sort of. 'Routine'. The abusive Father, the Mother too scared to fight for a loved son. And the son that longs for an escape, through the door...away from the fear and monster. This is raw and powerful.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Jacob Clifford

8 Years Ago

Thank you for reading. I enjoy hearing your thoughts.

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1735 Views
35 Reviews
Rating
Added on February 24, 2016
Last Updated on June 6, 2017
Tags: Child Abuse, belting, violence

Author

Jacob Clifford
Jacob Clifford

MN



About
Thank you, my Cafe family, for all that you have done for me. This has been a wonderful period of my life. If any of you ever want to reach me, feel free to send me an email at [email protected]... more..

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