Thankful

Thanksgiving Themed

Thankful (2015)

 

            With everything, all the pain, all the anger, all the sleepless nights, it's easy to forget just how lucky I am. It's too easy. Too easy to dwell on things. I can't count the number of afternoons I've spent doing nothing but hiding away in the dark corners of my mind and listing all the reasons why my life sucks. I don't ever try to start; it just happens. My mind wanders and takes breaks in all the wrong places. It hunkers down for the night next to my partial deafness. It calls up the nerve pain in my chest and talks for hours. It writes letters to the joint stiffness in my right hand and is sure to consult the dictionary before each word is written.

            But this isn't one of those times. This time, for once, I want to reflect on all the good things. This isn't all that easy to do, so I'll start off easy and try to slowly branch off. First of all, there is my family, of course. Without them, I would be nothing. Both literally and figuratively. Without my parents, and their parents, and their parents and so forth, I wouldn't even exist. But even more, I wouldn't be a shadow of the person I am today without the support and love my family gives me. I can still remember the day I first told my mother I was starting to write a novel. Seventh grade, twelve years old. I was nervous and made the statement almost jokingly, so that if she said it was a stupid idea I could easily back out. But she didn't, thank the lord. She has been encouraging since day one, with more than just writing, and I couldn't be happier about it. Writing, not just with novels but in all forms, has been one of the best things in my life. It lets me escape from bad memories, meet new friends (again, both literally and figuratively), and just straight up have fun. And my writing is going stronger than ever. My novel is slowly being completed. I've recently found a new form of expression in poetry. And I can create quick, fun worlds by writing short stories.

            I am thankful for my loving sister. We have never had the model sibling relationship, but we don't need to. We've been then when we were needed, and neither one of us could have survived through childhood without the other's support. And now that we're both starting to get our lives in order, I can't believe that it's all over--we aren't kids anymore. But that's okay. Nothing has to change. We can still be there when times get tough. And our family is soon to expand. Her baby is coming in a matter of months. The children are having kids of their own. As I write this, it is hours before her birthday. Truly, I don't know how I would have managed without you. I am so happy that you've found love. Life has so many doors, and you can choose to open any one you want. I love you, sis.

            I'm at the point in my life where I have to open some doors, myself. My school days are rapidly coming to an end, and it's terrifying. But I'll be okay. I just have to stick to what I believe and tough it out.

            Speaking of school, it's so easy to look back on it and think Ugh, thank god that's over, but there is plenty to be grateful for within school, too. I met my first friends in school. I had a chance to learn who I am. I even had a chance to show off at times. Naturally, it wasn't all good. But that's okay. I have faced challenge and learned to overcome it. I should really be thanking all those problems and people for making me a stronger person. Caleb, you cheeky windbag you. Your insults don't bother me anymore. I can think for myself. All of you teachers, you taught me discipline and work ethic. And yes, even you, Miss Peterson. You who made me cry. You who broke my heart into a thousand pieces.

            College is an exhilarating and scary experience. It shaped and refined me in ways I never expected. This time is where my writing really started to form. I may be a bit antisocial by nature, but I've found a way to be productive with my time. And I've finally found what I want to do with myself until my time on this earth runs out. Writing has allowed me to meet people, to touch people with my words, to learn about myself.

    In my short time on this website, I've made a number of great friends. I've never been one for online friends, but you all have changed my mind on that matter. Thank you for accepting me into your midst.

            And thank you, reader. Maybe I know you. Maybe I don't. I don't care. Thank you. Thank you for just being you. It may not seem like it sometimes, but you're beautiful. People care about you. The world would be a different place without you. You have talents. I know you can make a difference in the world. And I know just as much as everyone how easy it is to forget, but you have things to be grateful for. Find those things, and focus your efforts on them. Life's too short to stress the bad things. Meet people. Make mistakes. Learn something new. Just have some fun along the way.

Author's Note

What are you thankful for?

I hope I didn't get too gushy with this piece. It all sounded right in my head, and I hope it sounds right in text.

Reviews

[Kathy Van Kurin]

"Thankful"
Clifford,
How nice to come upon your shining reminder that life is good! It's not fall and definitely not Thanksgiving season but to read your message this mid-day has done me good. Thanks
The closing of your wonderful poem:
"people care about you.The world would be a different place without you. You have talents. I know you can make a difference in the world. And I know just as much as everyone how easy it is to forget, but you have things to be grateful for.Find those things, and focus your efforts on them. Life's too short to stress the bad things.
I wanted to absorb the above words.
Blessings,
Kathy

[Jacob Clifford]

Thank you very much, Kathy. It seems like people review this piece whenever I myself could use a reminder of what I have to be thankful for.

[Kathy Van Kurin]

I hope that little glimmers of God's gifts continue to make themselves know and you have eyes to see them. Bless you today!
Kathy

[Dante Carlisle]

Too often we fail to look at our lives in this manner. It's a part of the human condition that we obsess over that which is negative, rather than that which is positive. Thank you for putting this out there for us to read.

[Jacob Clifford]

Very true, Dante. Very true. Thank you for reading.

[PhoenixDown]

Going to comment once more on this piece. Your message really ended up resonating with me. A simple message yes, but one that is not stressed enough. Thank you again Clifford. I am thankful for much these days, including yourself.

Phoenix

[Jacob Clifford]

Glad the message is staying with you. Seeing the good in life makes things much more bearable.

[PhoenixDown]

Love this. This comes across just perfect. True.

I was thinking this an hour or so ago, regarding thanks. People so often skip from Halloween to Christmas. It is nice to see others getting lost in such selfless thoughts. This is a beautiful craft, Clifford. Be proud of your personality, character, nature, etc. Everything that makes you, you. Whether you want to believe it or not, you move pieces along this chessboard of a life.

As you give thanks, we do too. Thank you Clifford. Talent beyond his years.

[Jacob Clifford]

Thanksgiving really doesn't get enough attention, in my opinion. It's easy to let life slip on by and only remember the big ticket events. But it's the little things that add up to make us who we are. Thank you very much for your kind words.

[Crazycatgirl_10]

Wow I just love this piece. The whole thing was absolutely amazing. It is also a good reminder to look for the good in life instead of the bad. Great work.

[Jacob Clifford]

Thank you very much, Crazycatgirl. I'm glad you appreciate the meaning.

[barleygirl]

I find this to be very inspiring. Even before I got to the part where you're inviting us to dig deep & be thankful, I was already formulating a similar Ode of Gratitude in my mind as I read yours. I notice that most of your thankfulness applies to people. Yet you describe yourself as "antisocial" . . . I am also fairly reclusive myself, but I rarely find myself feeling thankful about this many people adding helpfully to my life. Instead, my thankfulness is for the abuse & neglect, which made me stronger & more understanding of others who are broken by similar experiences. Thanks for sharing this. It's very thorough & clear & sincere.

[Jacob Clifford]

Thank you for reading. I certainly would describe myself as anti-social (read: socially awkward), but I still recognize all the good that people have done me. In reference to your thankfulness to "abuse and neglect", I think part of the reason I'm so thankful for everything in life is because I once didn't want life. Now I realize some of the beauty it has.

[.]

A very bold story, grounded in reality, from the core of life and experience.

I have to say I agree with many of the points you make in this story. Being thankful for the little things in life, things that we tend to overlook, as we find ourselves bogged down in the mire of everyday life. This is a very generous piece of writing. It is difficult to reveal oneself to the world, as you have done here.
I am most thankful for the opportunity to love and be loved, before my life starts to slide slowly downhill with the passing of time.
A well written, and very revealing write.

[Jacob Clifford]

Thank you very much for reading, Doodley. I wrote this story for anyone struggling with pretty much anything life has to offer. Not everything has an upside, but most things do. I tried to show that in this story, to say not everything is bad. When I went through my rough times, I reread this story, and I'm very glad for it. It made me remember everything I talked about.

[Autonomous]

I am thankful for too many things to count and name. To have just gotten to take a step into life is good enough for me but it just keep on expanding and the possibilities are still endless to me.

[Jacob Clifford]

Lovely view on things, Zwsed. Thank you.

[Lee Bakes]

I am thankful that I have found solace in writing, that I have such an imperfect and hence lovely family full of the craziest people, oh I don't know, there are a lot of things that I am grateful for in life and *fingers crossed* to that.... it is nice to read an open letter like this and just stop everything, all the worrying and the self pity I can get into sometimes, which is actually so sad cause there have already been good stuff in our lives. maybe its just the fear of losing what we already have that keeps us from acknowledging its actual worth? I really don't know. Thanks for the write, its something we all need to read once in a while :) Stay happy!

[Jacob Clifford]

Thank YOU for reviewing and leaving your thoughts, Lee. I'm really glad people started giving this story attention once again; in a difficult part of my life, rereading what I already wrote reminded me of what's important. Thanks for reminding me.

[Unknown Poet]

Very beautifully written...
I loved it, while reading I realized so many things happened in my life....

[Jacob Clifford]

It is very easy to ignore the positive and focus on the bad. Thanks, Uday.

[Unknown Poet]

*Nods* You're true brother..