Shiny

Raccoon's Point of View

Shiny, 

shiny, 

shiny. 

I stared at the shiny in the middle of the road, drooling slightly. 

The shiny was in between two yellow lines. 

It was so big! 

I had to have it for my collection. 

All of the other raccoons would be jealous. 

It was so big. 

I started for it. 

Placing my left paw on the cool surface, I froze.

“Never, EVER, cross the path that the two-leggers use! They’ll hit you down before you take one step onto that road!”

Mama Coon’s voice echoed inside my head. 

I glanced around. 

No humans. 

I should listen to Mama Coon. 

But the shiny was so big! 

None of my other shinys were that big and that shiny! 

I needed it! 

I placed another paw down, tensing. 

I looked around again. 

No humans. 

I shouldn’t even try. 

Mama Coon is never wrong. 

I pulled my foot back and checked the path. 

Nothing moved. 

Maybe she was wrong this once.  

I placed my paw back down. 

The shiny was so shiny. 

It was so big! 

Everyone would be jealous. 

Even Mama Coon. 

Maybe that’s why she didn’t want me on the path. 

She wanted the big shiny! 

I needed it! 

Glancing around one more time, I scampered over to it, my claws clicking against the ground. 

They would be so jealous. 

I reached my slender fingers around it and pulled. 

It didn’t move! 

It was stuck! 

It was so big! 

I needed it. 

My friends would be jealous.

 I pulled again. 

It was growing brighter. 

It was so shiny! 

My shiny was so shiny! 

Mama Coon would be jealous. 

It was so big! 

But it was stuck. 

The shiny was so bright, it hurt my eyes. 

I looked away. 

That’s when I saw it. 

The biggest shiny! 

Bigger than me, bigger than Mama Coon and my nest. 

It was so shiny! 

It was coming towards me! 

I sat back on my legs and stretched my arms forward, ready to catch my new shiny. 

The other raccoons would be jealous. 

Right when I was about to catch my shiny, I heard Mama Coon scream. 

I looked over to see her running towards the path.

 I smiled and waved at her. 

And then the shiny hit me.

Author's Note

Just a small little thing I wrote when I first began writing. Let me know what you think!

Reviews

[Stan Lee]

Ouch! That was a brutal ending! Appealed to the macabre sense of humor.
I don't normally like stories from an animal "perspective" but this one was a good length and kept my interest right up to the surprise ending. Great job. :)

[K.Butler]

Thanks for the review!