[untitled]

My heart breaks

As you cry out

My hands begin to shake

As I start to doubt

You tried to be strong

And give it your all

But it won't take long

As you start to fall

I see your life fade

With my very own eyes

Oh the mess you've made

Makes everyone cry

With one final breath

You say your goodbyes

You reach out to death

And float to the skies

Leaving me here

To cope with my sadness

I loved you my dear

Through all the madness

Reviews

[Jennifer94]

Very tragic. But written very well.

[Thoughts]

really...a touching one...full of emotions...great job!!!

[mR668]

For someone who doesn't consider themselves a good writer, this damn sure was an excellent start. Not sure if this is just writing or therapy of some sort...either way you conveyed your feelings beautifully! Don't let go of that pen!

[*** Hey Jude***]

This heart felt write touches the soul. Your well-versed prose is something that many can relate to. Nice work! ~ Jude :-)

[.Bunnie.]

I really liked this poem. The whole thing flowed smoothly and tied into the ending well. You express emotions quite well. Overall, I would say a great piece. Would love to hear more from you! :)

[Chloe..Across the Unive..]

i love your writing style here.. love the line ' I loved you my dear through all the madness'
sad , still yet a beautiful write.
chloe