This was actually the first piece I ever put on Writers Cafe from years back on my old account which I have since deleted. I guess now it's a staple of my writing? Haha :)
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you've taken the ethereal images dwelling in your mind and shared by materializing the intangible to real, graciously bringing to the reader a transport to sacred glimpse into the character's heart, . . . emotions are vivid, . . . even to the setting's outside environment, it's poignant subtlety, brought into the picture, melding together with feelings, temperature, color . . . ash and mauve's effect . . . , Beautiful wistfulness, gorgeous symmetry of your script's prose that tells a story with unusual description, mesmerizing and sad, yet pleasurable to read over and over again.
Posted 5 Years Ago
2 of 2 people found this review constructive.
5 Years Ago
Your review was written so lovely I felt as I were actually reading a poem. I'm glad my poem had tha.. read moreYour review was written so lovely I felt as I were actually reading a poem. I'm glad my poem had that effect. Thank you so much! :)
oh wow, yes, the forever after thing...that kind of love...i thought i would find it...now i imagine i was on a fool's errand...
but you put it so eloquently with your flavorful wording and precise imagery.
nicely done.
j.
' Looking for the enigma with sable locks and virescent irises. - Waiting for him, - The boy that promised - they'll be together forever, - The man that never came. - The entity that never existed.'
Beautiful language laid in an amazingly rich manner. Idiosyncratic in need, having to spread sights and emotions together complete with 'full orchestra!' Seems as if looking out from thoughts as sad as sad. Passing through time, part there, part not - even now.
Is it sad to read how strongly your memories and emotions have laid there, waiting for.. a mere dream? Feel as if you've presented this reader with a mystery..
Posted 5 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
5 Years Ago
What lovely thoughts! You captured the feeling of ambiguousness and longing perfectly. Thank you for.. read moreWhat lovely thoughts! You captured the feeling of ambiguousness and longing perfectly. Thank you for reading and sharing your ideas. :)
I like your dream! :) I often wonder what is better, the image one places in the minds ideal or the one that faces us? I say this in terms of the tantalizing pursuit of the ideal Vs what is given and here's the rub by way of explanation.... Say we found that ideal, unwrapped the perfect package made to order and shipped to your living room. Would we even truly like it? My guess is i would immediately start forming a new ideal having recognized the follies of my past expectations! i love this i love your word choices and how the mesh into the weave of your story very nice!
Posted 5 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
5 Years Ago
I like your idea of forming new ideals after recognizing the follies of our previous expectations! C.. read moreI like your idea of forming new ideals after recognizing the follies of our previous expectations! Certainly it's the idea of "it's not all that it's cracked up to be." Thank you so much for reading and imparting your thoughts! :)
Dreams are our perfect reality
Desires with soft wings
Boy cannot became man
Man cannot return into his old form
You created one human touch
Bitter and hopefull
Creative in own existence
One day dreams will stop exist
Cause they all will became
Our perfect reality
P.S My mind probably went just in my direction. But thats how i feel about your poem. I hope you like itg.
in a certain way dreams are photographs; a culmination of selfies cataloged in our subconscious. You can't get to the end of a dream without contemplating the images they conjure. And I love the ending...great poem.../dana
Posted 5 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
5 Years Ago
Interesting thought. After I dream (given that I remember), I always try piecing together why I drea.. read moreInteresting thought. After I dream (given that I remember), I always try piecing together why I dreamed those images.. Sometimes, they're age old remembrances from the subconscious..
Thank you for stopping by!
Even if it is only a dream, it is breathtakingly beautiful and gives her a reason to expect and hope, pigment of her imagination,...that she had manufactured in all details will materialize some day... in the last couplet she comes to an understanding and accepts her reality.
A beautiful composition. Loved reading your lovely poem, Chryiss.
Posted 5 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
5 Years Ago
Wishing for that dream to be reality, as you said eloquently..those manufactured details will materi.. read moreWishing for that dream to be reality, as you said eloquently..those manufactured details will materialize one day.. but accepting reality.. You've understood my intentions for the poem perfectly. Thank you so much for imparting your time and words! ^^
Wow, you have considerable strengths both as a poet and a psychologist ! You'r phrasing and diction work beautifully together and the poem ends in gentle irony, not something easy to achieve.
Posted 5 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
5 Years Ago
Hahaha, psychologist! That's a first! Thank you, I'm glad you thought so! I appreciate you stopping .. read moreHahaha, psychologist! That's a first! Thank you, I'm glad you thought so! I appreciate you stopping by~ :)
I admire you for your love of words. Wet panes strain reality. In between the eye and the shimmer, lay the reflection of words not spoken...
Posted 5 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
5 Years Ago
Oooh~!! I never thought of the shimmer being a reflection of unspoken words, very nice!
Thank.. read moreOooh~!! I never thought of the shimmer being a reflection of unspoken words, very nice!
Thanks for imparting your words and time for stopping by!
this is a bountiful buffet of words, imagery, and feeling. was exposed to some words we don't often come across. dreams that never come true can be tough to come to terms with, especially where the heart is involved. you've done an excellent job of describing that difficult reality. there is a harsh, philosophical truth to your words. quite a powerful read. nice job ... :)
Posted 5 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
5 Years Ago
Hmm, buffet~ I'm glad this had that effect on you, and you're quite right. Not fulfilling, or merely.. read moreHmm, buffet~ I'm glad this had that effect on you, and you're quite right. Not fulfilling, or merely even chasing, one's dreams can lead to longing and regret. Realities are tough. Thank you for sharing your insight and stopping by!
An artist. A dreamer. A writer. A storyteller. I am Chryiss.
These stories are the culminations of my imagination. Will you share in my daydreams?
My latest fantasy novel, My World To Live, is ava.. more..