R - E - S - P - E - C - T

by Christiane McGahan on Thursday, 28 October 2010 at 10:21 Topic: Children

I've always believed in respect, as a two-way street.  You've got to give it, to get it - if you try to change the flow of 'traffic' to a one-way street, all you wind up with is a dead-end.

 

I've always believed too, that if we want our children to grow up to be decent, respectful adults; we their parents, aunts, uncles, teachers,  the adults in their lives need to treat them with respect too.  That doesn't mean we don't teach them discipline whatever way is necessary and acceptable in the situation, but it does mean no name-calling.  If you label a child, he or she is liable to grow into that label.  If you must label, make it positive - feel free to tell my children they're smart, funny, helpful, creative... you get the idea.

 

Now that I'm a parent though, I've realized that the two-way street has a footpath.  Children also notice and emulate the actions of the adults in their lives, with their peers... they copy the way they see you interacting with others, whether it is family, or strangers in the street.  I'm particularly aware too, that whatever they see and copy from me now, is likely to come back to me someday when they become adults and I'm old(er).

 

So... here is my pledge.  I'm going to teach my children the value of family, by showing them that I value our family. I'll keep teaching them by example that arguments aren't forever, that we tell our parents that we love them, that we do everything in our power to show those we are close to, that they are important.

 

I'll teach them respect for themselves and others by treating myself and others around me with respect - even when it's a stranger on the street.  I won't shout at, or curse the drunk who stumbles and nearly falls on top of my babies in the pram in the street - I might glare at him because they can't see my face, but I'll accept his slurred apology and walk away, because I want them to learn to hold their tempers.

 

Whenever it's called for though, I will stand up for myself because I want them to learn that they are not doormats.  They will learn from me that there is a time and a place when it is necessary to be more than just the 'peacemaker'.  I will do my best to have them grow up to be strong, courteous, loving, independent individuals...  that is what I want for my sons.

 

My prayer:   Every parent makes mistakes.  Dear Lord, please grant that the mistakes I am sure to make will be mild ones that can be reversed without psychiatric intervention!