I Was Surprised To Find It Was True

I haven't wrote some prose/short story for a while now. Here is a piece that I hope resonates well with you all. Let me know what you think.

I Was Surprised To Find It Was True

a short story by Chris T.

 

People spoke of you on the night at that gathering in my loft,

Words about you flitted around like the disjointed flight of a bumble bee.

The subject wasn’t grim or morose, at least it wasn’t to my ears.

But they did mock you for your stand and your belief.

 

 I could see the poison was brewing as they all unleashed their venom,

Each in the style they all  grew up on and with the ease and comfort of a village prostitute.

As I circulated around the room bending my ear to the same story told 30 different ways,

 My intrigue in you began to mount like the swells at “Swami’s”  and the riptide at “Newport”.

 

You see, the tale they were belching from their vicious lips,

Was a saga about the work place; a typical story about office politics.

I awaited the usual end of accounts that I have heard so many times before,

But, a radical shift in the ending lured me in closer.

 

You were not concerned about the winning of wars or the saving of face,

Nor, did you unleash your fury and unloose the result of your entire childhood misfortunes on your misguided foe.

The buzz was: you stood there, smile firmly encasing the reflection of a confident but loving center.

A person more concerned about the other  who was expending a lot of energy in doing you the most harm rather than mounting a defense.

 

So the naysayers stood back with crooked grimaces and laughed at your weakness with everyone expressing it,

Each one with the maximum amount of effort in their slander.

 

I was taken a-back as I watched you that night.

The confident way you smiled while holding that little green bottle of Perrier between you slender fingers,

As the lions, they drank from debauchery’s cup.

I marveled at your careful attention for every person you met,

Not letting concentration slip away or distraction to take root,

While the wolves stared at you with sideways glances and whispered murmurs of half-truths.

 

I began to make my way shifting my gait back and forth, to an fro,

Leaving behind each critic like mile-markers on a dreary-wet freeway.

As we stood face to face, I remained silent there with you.

A placid moment had passed, but I just stared directly into your eyes without speech.

The sides of your beautiful mouth raised up on both ends and I joined you in expression.

I never spoke a syllable to you that night,

Nor did I try to regale you with one of my favorite anecdotes I keep in my back pocket reserved for times when I don’t feel secure in a crowd.

No, I just gazed at your entire face and at last gave you a nod that stated “A tip of the cap to you, my friend of faith”.

 

I turned a 180 and beat my heels in another direction with my mind filled with the thought:

“I was surprised to find it was true”; another believer of faith, a firm, unshakable person in a sea of disingenuous cowards.

Could it be I found a remarkable gem? A soldier of prayer? A life laid down to her own desires and bent to the will of our Creator?

I finally reached the kitchen to assemble another tray filled with treats,when I notice the rudder of mockery had been turned towards me.

I caught the last glimpse of her as she moved towards the front door, eyes locked on mine and in a last parting show of respect,

As she unfurled her flag of admiration, giving me a reciprocal nod as genuine as the one I had delivered to her.

Author's Note

I love it when I discover a new friend of faith, especially someone who is slow to speak and quick to listen. I am so excited to see it when that person lives out their lives in a way that can only be described as :”God’s love, shown to all”. This is a short story about an encounter I had a few years back and the impact it made on me that night. The bible says: “ Now that you have purified yourselves by obeying the truth so that you have sincere love for your brothers, love one another deeply, from the heart.” (1Peter 1:22 NIV) She was totally obedient to that directive, even in the midst of persecution. I applaud her and to others out there who faithfully do the same.


As I have said many times before, please feel free to comment, re-post and share what you read here today.

God Bless you all, my dutiful readers and friends

The Great Plains Poet, admirer of pure living and supporter of truth.

Reviews

[Kenneth The Poet]

While I disagree with you on fundamentals, I like Jesus's words of inclusiveness because he showed that by sitting with the wretched at Matthew's house. I find the same sentiments expressed as well in other belief systems (a common one that the law of ethical reciprocity [golden rule]) and in such challenging prose too. This was a nice piece to read, but the formatting was hard for me. Otherwise, bravo.

[Warrior]

Great story telling. This did justice in the realm of getting the message across. Great message. There's lot of times where a story can have a great message to aim for, and have a lot of under lining things but then no one gets it, and if no one gets it, then the point has failed. But in my opinion this did well to get the message across. You made it clear, which is why I think it's good. Keep up the good work. What was also great was that I could imagine the story as I read it, and that is also a strong point of stories. The ability to have the reader imagine it because after all we're reading not watching it, but it was as if I was there as I read this, and that is great. Good job once again.

[Qualia]

Relatable. I like that the writing has the same 'tip of the cap nod' feel to it as the words continue on. Your words reflect the feeling well.

[Daytonight]

Well done! Thanks for sharing. Keep on penning.

[Free Expression As Revo..]

I myself am not a Christian. It's nothing personal, I just don't believe in the words of the Bible, and I have no problem with those who do.

I have, however, experienced something similar to this, and the flawless way in which you described without telling made the images form crystal clear inside my head.
The way you portray the people around without letting them overshadow the mysterious character of the woman is brilliant.

I loved this, and look forward to reading some more of your work.

[~Blue Fantasy~]

This is great write! I understand what you are saying in this. I have been there too and it is hard to do what she did!!!!!!!!!! To be honest I don't like being put in that situation eekkkk. I can relate with her in other areas of life but not work b/c Im not in a work setting. But anyways this is a great write and yes it is hard to do what she did!!!!

[patricia]

This is really good stuff. People on a higher plane always fascinate me. I guess their friends are fewer but the quality of friendship sure makes up for it. Thanks.

[Rose of Gondor]

NICE!!!!!!!! P. S. Shouldn't this be a poem rather than a story?

[Amila Jay]

This is an awesome piece of writing:)

[Fairytale]

Thank you for sharing your experience with us. I admire your faith. There was a lot of flowery, passionate description. This can work in smaller doses throughout the writing, but you may want simplify the writing as to make it more comprehendable. Your wonderful, passionate thoughts could be expressed through some kind of action rather than just description. How did it happen. I could see this as the beginning (or middle) of a full-sized story.