Bottle Rockets and Blankets

This is about a one of many camping trips I took as a teenager.

Bottle Rockets and Blankets

Written by T. L. O’Neal

 

     Back in my early teens, my cousin Larry and me would camp out a lot on the weekends. Most people would campout to get back to nature and things like that, but we did it for a little freedom and a chance to make a little mischief. We didn’t camp in tents like most other people did; we would campout in old abandoned houses and buildings and such as that. On this particular trip we camped in an old country store building, it was the one Mama’s Uncle Carey used to run years ago. We had it fixed up pretty nice with 3 or 4 old recliners and other chairs, a table, and a cot to sleep on. We usually slept in the recliners for the simple fact that they were just more comfortable. There wasn’t any electricity in the building either, so we had lanterns and flashlights, all which made the experience a lot cooler.

 

   On this particular occasion besides us two there was also Robert, who usually camped with us and was almost always the butt of our jokes and torment. He was very big and strong for his age with fists the size of a sledgehammer but he had a sweet disposition and I never seen him lose his temper. He was a good boy but a little slow at times but was always a good friend to have around. I guess that’s why we pushed him so hard, just to find out what his limit really was. Also with us this time was Ray. I didn’t know Ray as well as the others but he was hell-bent on going with us this time, so we were more than willing to oblige him. This was the first time that he “camped” with us, so we were going to break him in good somehow or other, we just hadn’t concocted a plan as of yet.  None of us boys had a father figure back home so I guess at times we had to get together and get some of that male bonding out of the way and have a little fun.

 

    Now Ray didn’t have a sleeping bag or any other camping gear for that matter, so his mother let him use a quilt his grandmother had made.

 

His mother had said to him before we left, “Ray, it’s very important that you take care of this quilt, it means a lot to me.”

 

Ray made the standard teenage promises to his mother and we were on our way.

 

     We reached the building and did the regular teenage boy things; eat snacks, look at old girly magazines, tell jokes and other fun things. And someone had the bright idea to bring some bottle rockets and firecrackers. They won’t easy to come by back then around here either, being that they were illegal in this state at the time. So someone’s relative or someone had to get them across the border from South Carolina I suppose. South Carolina was always the Mecca for everything illegal back then, because everything was legal there and everything was illegal here in North Carolina. Hell, everyone even went to SC to get married back in the day because they had a lower age requirement. Anyway, so this was big stuff to have those illegal fireworks, and we decided to wait till night to set them off since it was such a special occasion.

 

      So when nighttime finally came, we lit the firecrackers and shot the bottle rockets with the all expected oohs and aahs. We had a lot of fun with those things, being that they were always as scarce as hen’s teeth around these parts. We did keep a few of them so that we would still have some leftover to use for the next day. With all of that out of the way and everyone starting to get tired, Ray and Robert turned in to go to sleep. Larry and me never being one to sleep away our freedom for the night, wasn’t ready to waste it. So we told jokes and laughed and irritated the other two for just the hell of it. After this went on for a good while, one of us, I don’t remember which, decided to take up the irritation a couple of notches. We always did like to do that, irritate whoever else was with us at the time. We were like a regular tag team of annoyance of the camping out world and we where the champions at it too I believe. If not we were at least runner-ups.  Anyhow, we took some of those leftover bottle rockets and decided to fire them off in that old building. I realize this wasn’t the brightest idea in the world, but hey, we were just some stupid kids with a mean streak a mile long. So we started to tie the fuses together for we could shoot two or three at a time, this seemed to be a better idea than just shooting one at a time because you could get more bang for your buck. It was about this time that we then noticed Ray lying there across the room in the recliner, with the quilt that his mother told him to take care of, that was made by his grandmother… sleeping like a baby.

 

    In our teenage minds we didn’t see it as being a sweet scene as such; we saw it more as a target for those bottle rockets that we had just tied together. This brilliant and inventive idea seemed to come into our heads simultaneously. So we stuck those now tied together bottle rockets into some bottles, lit those things and pointed them into his direction and let them fly out of those Coca-Cola bottles like they were shot out of a cannon. Let me tell you, those things flew as pretty as you please too, just like one of those military rockets on those war movies you see. All six of those rockets hit in a six-inch pattern right in the middle of Ray’s chest. They were spitting fire and as they ran out of gas, started to explode… one by one. One thing that we did not consider was that they might start a fire, and they did…right in Ray’s lap.

 

    We were laughing and enjoying the whole situation, while Ray was waking up to a slightly warm lap and Robert who was up by now, trying to stomp out the fire on the quilt…while it was still on Ray. Now this was just too funny and we were splitting our sides watching the other two going nuts and trying to put out that quilt. Ray was a screaming and Robert was a cussing, wondering why we would do such a thing as that. To tell you the truth, I just don’t really know myself; I guess it’s like those who climb Mt. Everest… because it was there. It did seem like a good idea at the time but in retrospect it probably wasn’t, but it was still funny. Well anyway, they finally did get it put out and they were both madder than a wet hornet too. The two of us were still laughing, actually we were laughing a lot harder now; we just couldn’t help it you know. We sure didn’t plan on that, especially after we saw a hole the size of a basketball through that quilt of Ray’s. He was all upset over this, and rightly so. By this time Robert had settled down a bit and found a little humor in it too but Ray wasn’t laughing at all. So everyone went on back to sleep again, except us two, Larry and me that is.

 

    Now we were always know to take things the extra mile, to take it just as far as we could go with it, and this time was no exception. We still had a one hundred count Black Cat firecracker pack left and didn’t see any point in wasting them. Now these things were really neat; you could light one and they all would go off like a machinegun, all one hundred of them. Robert was lying there fast asleep on the cot and was a prime target for those firecrackers. After what had already happened, I’m not sure why I did this but I lit those bad boys and let them fly. They landed right on top of him and his blanket about midway, and we waited for the fun. Those things started popping so fast that you couldn’t even count them if you wanted too. Poor old Robert jumped up screaming and was stomping the exploding firecrackers and the blanket too that was now smoking. He was having a pure fit. Watching him jumping up and down on that smoldering blanket and screaming was just too blame funny to see. At least Ray got to see someone else get it besides him.

 

Robert was cussing and saying, “Why did ya’ll guys do that, are you crazy?”

 

“Well yea, we are.” We said back to him.

 

   I do think we found his limit that night, but we kept on laughing anyway. After he stomped out everything, and things got back to normal again, he started laughing with us.

 

“You guys are crazy,” he said.

 

  Told you it was hard to make him lose his temper.

 

Reviews

[Inmate 72866]

You tell this from first person, but it feels like it happened to you yesterday. You sound like that teenage boy and I think that is one of your gifts. You can get into the head of a character and really become that character. I think the story format is your forte. You have such a wonderful knack for narrative. I would like to see you string some of this together into something longer, maybe a novel. You've got natural ability. A little grammatical honing and you could really go far with it. Keep up the good work. By the way, those fireworks are still illegal down this way. The South Carolina fireworks business is alive and well.

[Gandré]

This was such a funny story. I enjoyed it. Terry, ur a great storyteller.

[Kevin Connolly]

I'm surprised Robert and Ray didn't strangle the pair of you eejits.
Great story, Terry. Boys will be boys.

Brilliant paragraph:

Ray was a screaming and Robert was a cussing, wondering why we would do such a thing. To tell you the truth, I just don�t know myself; I guess it�s like those who climb Mt. Everest, because it was there. Well they put it out, and they were both madder than a wet hornet (I love that line).

[Kchung]

This reminds me of my childhood when I was with my older guy cousins, only I got mad and cried a lot. Very funny stuff if I say so myself.

[Bubo]

Loved it!!Great capture of youth!!Reminds me of my boarding school days.............one older girl had one pigtail cut off as she slept!
Well done!

[Amy Widmer]

lmao! No wonder I was always the last to fall asleep on those campouts... I didn't trust my friends not to do something crazy! lol Brings back memories... thank you for sharing.

[Sean Allen]

Thank you for this little glimpse into your youth. Very well done and realistic as we can almost see the characters as the deeds play out. All we ever did as kids was steal pumpkins in October and pile them up in front of the front door of the Police Station.

[Matthew]

Great story, reminds me of some of the fun, stupid, crazy things I did myself as a teen!

[Moonlight]

If I was the 'Mama'...I woulda' tanned yer a*s!

And when I was done?

I'd a' let yer own Mama tan yer a*s too!

Damn you were bad!!!

*LOL LOL LOL*

Moonlight.

[Adam Greenfield]

Good one. Strangely enough, I think I had friends like that. Oh, and I thought of a place called South of the Border when you mentioned buying firecrackers in South Carolina. Love that place.

I think what I like most about this story is how easy it is to read. I really feel like I'm on the phone or listening to a message left on an answering machine (one with a lot of space to record, mind you).

I am curious about one thing, though. The last we heard of Ray was "Ray was all upset about this, and rightly so." I'm curious what his reaction would be to the incident with Robert. Would he laugh, too?

I really liked this one! Thanks for the request.

[Kira Love]

Well, well, well, The T-man loved to cause a little mischief in his day, I see... You HAD to do it, didn't you... :P

Awesome story telling, as always! I loved it!!!