Searching

This is simply something i did one night, theres was something about that night that made me want to write it.

I exit the door slowly closing it softly behind me; tilt the brim of my fitted over my eye. The find the night chilly as a cool breeze wraps around my neck, I can feel the goosebumps all over. One single bird flys in front of the cloud covered moon; and I think he must not be able to sleep either. Thoughts increasingly begain to unwind and I can feel the heaviness on my shoulders. I get in the car and start the engien, after a few minutes of rambleing i find the perfect cd; musiq soulchil; I begain to back out of the parking space and a car zooms past me nearly scraping my bumper. "DAMN!", I look twards the car as its red rear light disapear behind a corner but before I can grip hold of an attitude, "F**K IT" I let it go. I had soething more important to do anyway, Im on a mission, Im in search of my soul, yeah I know thats a little deep for one in the morning but why else would someone be up at this hour, ok ok there are other reasons but none of those or on my mind at the moment. Im driving down Cockrell Hill feeling so lost, I mean I know where I am at but where am I. As soon as I think everything is begaining to make since everything goes crazy, I begain to not even know who I am let alone where Im going. I sit low in my seat as I drive, Im only going about 35 miles an hour and for me thats abnormal even though thats the speed limit. I begain to talk to God, asking questions I know Ive asked so many other times before, my talks with God go way back, I was raised in the church and as close as i should be to God is as far away from Him as I feel. Most of the time it went something like God, why am I going through this or why is my family going through this. I begain to go back in my mind; a song plays; BACK IN THE DAY WHEN I WAS YOUNG IM NOT A KID ANYMORE BUT SOME DAYS I SIT AND WISH I WAS A KID AGAIN".