Rest in Peace 14th of June 2023

For my V

I don’t want just love�"
Not the kind that fades with time,
Not the kind that settles for comfort,
Not the kind that stays just because it should.

I want someone in love with me,
Who sees the passion in my eyes
And lets me dance in the rain,
Who stays not out of habit,
But because every part of me feels like home.

I want someone patient,
Someone who won’t quiet my worries,
But will over-explain until they melt away.
Someone who won’t just watch me laugh,
But will create the moments that make me.

I want someone who reaches for my hand
Not because I need to be held,
But because they need to feel me close.

Someone who remembers the little things�"
My favorite flower, the way I hum when I’m lost in thought,
Not because I asked,
But because I am woven into their world.

I want someone who teaches me,
Who shares their knowledge
Without making me feel small.
Someone who takes their time with me,
Who sees the world through my eyes
And gets excited just because I am.

I want someone who looks at me every day
Like it’s the first time,
Who never lets familiarity dim the way they see me.
Someone open, honest, unafraid to feel,
To share, to be.

I want someone who won’t leave my bed at 3 a.m.
And quietly close the door behind them,
But instead, stays the whole night,
Holding me like I am the safest place in the world.

I want someone who makes time for me�"
Not because I ask,
But because they crave to see me.

Someone who isn’t worried
About other eyes on me,
Because they know�"
Mine will only ever be on them.

I want someone who will never want to make me cry,
Because they understand
That when they speak to me,
They are speaking not just to the woman I am,
But to the child in me, too.

I want someone caring,
Someone who treats me as a partner,
Who trusts me,
Who walks beside me�"
Not in front, not behind,
But next to me, as equals.

I want someone who won’t place me lower
Just because I may be less knowledgeable,
Less successful,
Because they see worth beyond the surface.

Someone who won’t laugh when I fail,
But will help me grow,
And watch me rise,
Proud to be by my side as I do.

I want someone who understands
That when I say, “I don’t need help,”
It means let me do it myself�"
But be there when I need you.

I don’t want to be loved.
I want to experience love.

I want to copy your love.
I want to copy the first months of us.
That pure, reckless, teenage kind of love�"
Where you wanted to be perfect for me,
And I wanted to be perfect for you,
But we still accepted every flaw,
Every imperfection, every scar.

I want you�"
From that year when you used to love me.
I want you back,
From those months,
From that year,
When you taught me how to be in love.