Haunted houses

The pain has become a cruel playground,

smoke and mirrors.

Behind the scenes, 

I don't see people doing anymore...

I see people being, 

or not being. 

What is that editing force...

making actions feel like night.

An ancient battleground 

orchestrated by unknown constellations,

Time wins shy magic.

We haunted houses,

allow dusky penetrations 

framed by candle-light. 

Angels with clipped wings,

gaining insider's access

to this soul-splattered fight. 

Navigate these black waters

with tempestuous sight

The game of 

hide and seek

never did end...

Author's Note

I'm still debating about the ending...

Reviews

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i want this ending...there is something about playing hide and seek with feelings...poets put them out there for readers, but often in metaphorical terms, something abstract...the reader might seek but not find them exactly...just a facsimile that they might relate to their own lives.

we navigate the black waters as poets...we are our own haunted houses of the mind, heart and soul...if you find us and explore us, it might scare you.

yes, i think a more than proper place to end the poem...

after posting this, i saw underneath the comments by steve (kublakan) and am not
surprised by what he said about your work...similar tastes...
i too really like your style.

[Kleio13]

I feel like I can relate this to humanity. How " being" is that of us just " existing" not living. how war never ends and the limitation of pain has no barriers. "Navigate these black waters
with tempestuous sight. " i take this line as in not trusting anyone.

So deliberately written.

K

[Coyote Poetry]

You did very well with this poem. I like the way you set-up the house and I like the thoughts. I did like the ending. Left the reader with something to ponder. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[paul sal.....]

the editing force is our mind and the decisions we make, the art of being is a start, then we travel through life trying to figure out the right way to live, sometimes we dive right in, other times we hide from potential pain, all the while not knowing what the outcome will be.........it can be damn scary..

[Frontier]

indeed Paul, thanks for the insightful review

[Clockwork]

I agree wholeheartedly with Jacob and kublahkhan about your writing style. Your work has a palpable electricity, a glow of sorts. It's full of insight, full of pure sight.

Characterizing people with the haunted house metaphore was brilliant. Finishing with the image of hide and seek really delivers the emotional complexity you built in the earlier lines.

You do a wonderful job of pointing to where ghost live. You make those who have seen them before look closer, and those who have never seen them take notice.

[Frontier]

Thank you for this excellent review. After this and the other reviews I am convinced to leave the hide and seek part. :)

[Clockwork]

I'm glad :-) it's a nice turn of phrase to accompany the idea of all of those haunted rooms.

[kublakhan27]

You are an incredible writer...it is impossible for me to break this down into sections or specific images that I like...this is a fresh way of looking at things that I have never considered...I'm truly in awe of your talent.

[Frontier]

Thanks so much Kubla. I really enjoy your reviews, they really inspire me to write more. I guess this is your way of saying you liked the poem in it's entirety, which is flattering, coming from a great writer himself.

[PoemRodent]

I love your wording and the feel of this write. Not to sure I like the drop ending. Felt like it kinda just didn't end right for me. Just me though...

Rob

[Sami Khalil]

I like how your haunted houses are soul splattered with deep darkness trying to find the light...Bravo..............

[Frontier]

thanks for appreciating and taking the time to read :)

[Sami Khalil]

You are welcome muchly...:)...................

[Chris Micha]

I like the ending actually. Everyone has ghosts and it will never end, unless emotion is breed out of humans. I think you've done a great job and I love the concept.

[Frontier]

Thanks Christian. I like how you say it will never end, deep in a dark way.