Closing blinds (fading )

A blank stare, almost vacant now,

Only the small tick tock of your love's whisper

Hovering  in the back ground 

Emptiness looming 

This time I surrender 

Knowing in my heart

I lost the fight 

Author's Note

I may add more but kinda like it like this .. does this fit as a poem ,if not what would make it so ?

Reviews

[Wolfwind]

The words themselves, in the form that you have presented them are fine by me. They offer a somewhat dreamy/nightmare quality to them, as they are vague in whether they speak of the calm after making love, or the last moments before a lover has killed you. At least those are the two things I could see in the piece. :)
The only advice I would suggest, is to capitalize the first letter in every line... For me it looks better on the eye.

Keep up the good work!
Aaron

[Hoosier Belle]

seems okay like this, If it were me I'd add some rhyme to it. But you don't have to, I could take this write somewhere with the right rhyme added. I liked it, it made sense the way it is. Wonderful write.

[Stef Outsiders]

Even the simplist of writing comes in small packages and this comes with a punch.. A meaningful punch.. I like the way it is!
Only the small tick tock of your love's whisper... Love it... Well done .