Can You Handle City Fire?

Buzzing Skyline burning in my veins.
We're so far above the city
I've lost sight of the ground.
Your lips keep moving
But I can't make out what you're saying.
All this buzzing in my veins is making my brain fuzzy.
Slur that speech like it's the only thing you know how to do;
Doesn't matter.
I've always been better at it than you.
Shell-Shock Sobriety
From Life and from Love,
But from only those and nothing else.

He couldn't handle it.
The fire got too hot.
The bullet missed the spot.
The love began to rot.
Our hearts began to rot.

I watched you watching him touch me.
I could swear I saw you turn a subtle shade of Despair.

He let me go.
He let me go.
Will you let me go?
 

Reviews

[Leboutaine]

He couldn't handle it.
The fire got too hot.
The bullet missed the spot.
The love began to rot.
Our hearts began to rot.

The speed is brilliant. It builds up to the last line like a train pumping out all of its energy towards a station it never wants to stop at, then slides to a halt half way down a cliff. That's what it said to me. It's bold and harsh but it leaves nothing to be desired, and with only a few words used and not much complexity either. The whole piece seems to be very observational and doesn't seem to digress that much from that concept, but yet you seem to feel connected to everyone mentioned in the poem, and feel like you have a sense of their combined relationship. It's a great read. I'd like more of the same.

[Rachel DeHart]

This is absolutely amazing..
I love all the imagery and the feeling you've pumped it full of. Great work!!