Whispering waters

whispering waters 

tickling over rock and bend 

 then fading too naught

Reviews

[Crowley]

time moves on, so do water an love, this encapsulates a whole lotta truth in three lines, a success of the highest degree.

[W. Barrett Munn]

Excellent choice to change the entire meaning of where and how disappears the water.

[Cherrie Palmer]

Thank you Barrett.
The sound of water is one of my favorite things. Well the sound of the wind moving through the forest, or even the cry of the dove. Okay the sounds of nature are just beautiful to me. I like trying to capture them on paper.

[Lisasview]

Yes, after reading the reviews and coming up on my own I do believe it should be to rather than into..
I often struggle with that sort of thing.. Always feels like into works for me.. but is better.. Ahh well.
Short but oh so very good dear Cherrie...
Lisa

[Cherrie Palmer]

I decided to change it back making it 'to'.
Sorry for the delay I've been having trouble leaving comments.

[Pete]

this spoke deeply to me. much enjoyed. well done ... :)

[Cherrie Palmer]

:) thank you Pete I'm delighted you enjoyed this one.

[S.zaynab.kamoonpury]

A fab beautiful haiku with fine sights and sounds. Kudos!

Plz do read and comment my newest poem too titled, 'The better gems '

[Einstein Noodle]

nice haiku, mon Cherrie! what i really like about it is that the viewer's perspective goes no further than the bend ... that just captivates me for some reason ... as all water flowing downhill ends in the oceans ... or perhaps in underground collection pools .. or perhaps sky captured ... deposited on frozen tundra to forever be ice in ... but here am i ... enveloped by whispers .. growing roots into the earth ... nothing more but me and the river and the ending bend ... i love it girl!!!
E.

[Cherrie Palmer]

While you're here we might as well go fishing 🎣

[Einstein Noodle]

sounds idyllic dear friend .. warm sunny day .. camp chair, good book, a couple beers and who cares if i catch anything ... i'm not a very good fisherman am i!? ;)

[Einstein Noodle]

ps. i see you changed to and made it into .. now you have lost the 5 syllable advantage .. i think it should be "to" ......... with all due respect of course.

[Davidgeo]

into instead of to on the last line.

[Cherrie Palmer]

Yes I agree
Thank you 😊

[Davidgeo]

No, thank you Cherrie. I love your writing.

[William Michael Reeves]

Too cool! One of the best haiku I've read! It almost tickled my funny bone but in reverence for the natural vision you create I just smiled. Your beginning word whisper and end word not gave it profound emotions that are more than the picturesque setting. Excellent haiku Cherrie!

[Cherrie Palmer]

I love yhe sound of water. From waves breaking or the babbling of a brook. I like to try and capture it on paper.