shaping

we stood still

            stark and bare

somehow dull -

lifeless as

shale

 

somewhere upstream

the water ran dry

lives ago

 

the steady rains

when they came

reminded us

of us

 

and the water ran

smooth

through our cracks

faults and fissures

            somehow less

exposed -

lulled into quiet

dullness

            quenched and sated

 

sunshine

as she has

and will

            (until she’s done)

always pushes

through

            a time to dry

            expose

and the brittleness

returns

            fracturing our earnest         

            repose

 

the water run through

finished with us

and our shaping

 

nothing left

            but the scraping sound

shale on shale

like lives cascading

            delicate and

alone

Reviews

[Ed Hart]

a beautiful exposition of a time and a place of the heart...those who have passed that way, shudder at the echo of it...

[emmajoy]

Whatever the weather of time and relationship, time will full.stop.. Perhaps there's a fading of power and change in this writing, seems to be a run-through of what's been, a slow-driven coming to understand what's now left, comfortable but simple. And, perhaps, the damnable coming to turns with the past living of life and the now more mundane but hopefully, comfortable. Unsure, just my thoughts, written poorly - unlike your finely created words. '

You know, my friend, old souls, shall feel forever, as they can re-connect, no matter....
And I love your quill, I think it speaks of fuel, that no car can handle.

I love it.

- Elisa

[icelandicblue]

Water cleanses and refreshes but when it disappears we are left with shale on shale and bone on bone. Water shapes the earth and the sun exposes it as the water recedes leaving only the signature that once we were here.

[Robbie~xoxo~]

The wearing and tearing is felt...the "fracturing" is irreparable..
I get a sense of loneliness in this journey and time only makes it more fragile.

A well written, heartfelt piece.~xoxo~:)

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

This sounds like the ending of something, and perhaps the beginning of something else...something different. When there is nothing but time and the endless washing of life against our mortal selves, eventually we are "lives cascading/delicate and/alone". Great emotion in this one, and an awareness of self expression. Great imagery, and a sincere, smooth and tangible flow that is not unlike the water you expressed flowing through the fissures and cracks in us all. Well done.

[Corset]

Time and rain has a way of removing the dirt between stones till they rub thier little backsides together to create fire instead of heaps of dull shale, oh wait that's flint, well no matter river beds are full of slippery rocks. The sad emptiness of this poem is tangible, I can feel it, the way you have express a state of being so eloquently, so graciously...yet at the same time breathe life back into it, like poetic C>P>R> nice doorknob btw.

[Rosalind Gale]

F**k, I love this - normally, I reject that type of review 'I love this' - (I do not reject cursing) - however, you have written a poem I relate to on some level that I cannot put my dumb finger on. Perhaps I should have waited to review. No. That is not me at all, to wait. ''Lifeless as shale'' - like something I felt once on a beach, perhaps drunk, or high - or both. There is something here, a madness of drowning, or a dream when the dream is a killer - like, not being able to fly on waking.
Rosalind
-x-

[ChemicalMadness]

I welcome cursing. In fact, I'm not sure I've ever elicited a "f**k" before (with respect to my writing, of course), so I'm incredibly proud of this my first "f**k". ;)
I'm always amazed when my words connect with someone i've never met...like a magic trick you've seen but want to just keep on seeing....thank you so much for your words. As you know, i hold you in high regard, so you brought a smile to my face this AM.

CM.