you, again

i found your voice

                walking so quiet              

through my mind

                last night

 

in whispers

                you smiled at me

everything was broken

                and we laughed at our lovely mess

 

my hands seemed to dance

                slow

                quiet

                never still

                moving across the mountains

                                to you

searching still

                to fill the in between

this quiet, love

                this quiet is no void

 

we were full, then

so full of us

                i could almost read

the notes

                of your laugh

rising up to meet me

               

tentative left

                with that first kiss

when all we could taste

                was truth

                on our lips

 

souls so old

                when we first met

all we could do

was stare

                and study

and grow young

together

 

 I still dance

                every time i open a door

to find your smile

                walking so quiet

inside my mind

Reviews

[Tree]

You know I got a smile on my face because now I understand the connection. Time, memory. These are the things I flesh out with a tiny spoon, and you are doing something similar.

You have a distinct style, disciplined. You know who you are, why deviate? In that respect I am still finding my way.

Chem I like what you've done here, you have searched and found (or it found you) that memory, and you stopped time, to relive it. The other thing is your low pro style, using lower case in some pieces helps to keep the tone of the poet down, not minimizing the importance, but saying it instead in a firm whisper. The other thing, and this what I admire most is you know the structure your poem will rest in so well that you don't need much punctuation, not here. That takes skill to get right.

[ChemicalMadness]

Thank you so much for the thoughtful reviews, my friend!!
CM.

[gabrielle]

ah, this caresses my heart.
i particularly like this phrase "this quiet, love this quiet is no void" for when it comes to love, there's no need for verbosity as love would naturally resonates at a mere glance at a mere smile. i've read two of your pieces and i am loving your writing style!

[ChemicalMadness]

Thank you so much!

[Emily B]

these words - these words are so like something i would have written to a certain someone . . .

are you sure you aren't my twin?

[ChemicalMadness]

As near as I can tell, I was born solo. Now, admittedly, I do not have a firsthand account of the goings on that day.....but I'm reasonably confident we remain connected mainly by our love of the written word ;)
I'm so glad you connected with this!

[Emily B]

:)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

god this is beautiful...

so many lines to love...like "i could almost read the notes of your laugh"

that is a classic..

you create such a mood with your pieces...even in the abstractness, we feel the emotion the poet feels or felt.

[ChemicalMadness]

Thank you, my good man. Your words mean a great deal.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Beautifully written :) This one was more mournful than the last, but also that tinge of hope. I love the idea of old souls meeting and "growing young together", brilliant idea! Distance, space, time, the quiet, but not the void, it's all here waiting to be tasted and endured. Your writing always gives me the chills, this is no exception.

[ChemicalMadness]

Thank you so much.