in passing

'twas a feast
by most skilled hands
prepared
offered gently
to hungry hearts
in search of
repair

'cross candles lit
with hopeful ends
in mind
neglected souls
pursuits so nourished
perhaps now might
rewind

her eyes met
in hopes gentle embrace
as he leaned in close
sardonic smile sliding in sideways
last words fallen
like
knives

pass the salt

Reviews

[emmajoy]

It takes people the complete lack of something - anything, to appreciate what they've missed. Never again such casual, crass behaviour. How devoid of social skills, courtesy, appreciation, affection - whatever, so many people are. And when you have a setting like the one you've so gently created.. surely sharing is the main key to the meal. One prepares a dinner out of affection or love.. and little or nothing comes back.. how mean is that, especially longside that sardonic smile.

Of course, life's one long meal at which the right reactions should show, but too often do not. Thank-yous are slow to come, recognition for work done rarely said, people taken advantage of, its push and shove to the front of the queue, no matter what.. and then. there's that sardonic smile again. Shhhh Em, enough's enough!

Such a thoughtful write. with a bite at the end of it.

[ChemicalMadness]

At least I can say I got you a little worked up ;)
Thank you so much for the kind review!

[emmajoy]

Lack of thought, spitefulness, downright rudeness does appal me. Even honesty is attacked .. anyway.. yes, you got me a little worked up! Guess that's why people write, to feed on thought, to touch, to .. whatever. A fine piece of writing, yours. Sad.

[Angi]

CM, I am clumsy with reviews, please indulge me. I had to comment on this piece. I see someone opening themselves up, giving all for that repair. Hopeful, watchful. The other half knows it and just doesn't care. Makes me want to wipe that smile right off his face. I like poetry that makes me feel something. This one certainly did.

[ChemicalMadness]

I don't think you're clumsy at all... I love your take. I love that you FELT! Thank you so much for the feedback!!

[Angi]

My pleasure, always.

[icelandicblue]

Next time take-out. Sometimes you just can't please another so matter what the effort. I say throw that salt over your shoulder for luck and find a better entree. Loved the piece from top to bottom.

[Frieda P]

I do feel this one, putting yourself out there full tilt and getting the least amount in response, when life gets mundane and people start taking each other for granted. It's like a gentle slap in the face, but makes a big impact. Nice one!

[Marie Anzalone]

jacob says callous, I say... unobservant. I love to cook. I often cook for friends, enemies, colleagues, starving grad students, potential lovers. I have one friend I refuse to cook for. No matter what I do, he pushes food around on his plate and pretends to eat, like a toddler. Something is wrong with everything I prepare- from roast duck to scampi to minestrone to freaking mashed potatoes. He is totally unobservant to the time and effort of food preparation.

One day, he asked me to be his girlfriend. He wanted to know why I turned him down. I told him, a man not generous enough with compliments to be gracious for a well-prepared meal, will not be generous in other areas of love, either. He didn't get it. He has a double PhD and he didn't get it.

[redflutterby]

I can relate well to this piece. Too give so much time and energy to another and be treated with such indifference is a stab in the heart. It is what kills so many relationships, sadly!

[Rita L. Sev]

I feel like this is a poem of love gone awry - in the beginning, a feast by candlelight, then in time, neglect. Those last words are the knife to the heart, and the salt is for the wound. You certainly painted a vivid picture for me (whether any of this is what you had in mind!) Great write!

[ChemicalMadness]

Thank you!

[Peter H]

ah,sounds like someone was ungrateful for the decent meal which was made for him it seems like she put alot of work into it .good poem it captures the apathy we treat our paramours or even persons that help us and do nice things for us on a daily basis .

[jacob erin-cilberto]

how callous people can be...we don't do things to get the appreciation, but a little bit shown surely doesn't hurt...especially when we really work hard to please..

there is that feeling in this poem of being taken for granted..never a good thing..

but the poem is.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Interesting... This one is a little cryptic, my friend. Yet, it still holds true to your unique style and flair, so it is still a winner for me. I like the ending...the hopefulness of some kind of interaction and then all she gets is "pass the salt". What a metaphor...just the other day, I did something for someone and expected to get some big, amazing, "wow, you are absolutely gorgeous and fantastic" and I got some off handed one word response. These things hurt my heart...sometimes I think I'm too fragile. And now this has turned into a personal rant.

Okay, back to the poetry. This reminds me of "Hotel California". :)