Forbidden Fruit...

A senryu.

Only when ripened,
is forbidden fruit worthy,
of the sinful bite…

Author's Note

In response to my friend, NickB's poem.

Reviews

[SteveB]

Brilliant! Technically sound and well balanced as a senryu. As a reminder for the sensual life stellar.

[Quill~]

:) thank you... I enjoyed writing it.

[SteveB]

And I enjoyed reading it so we are even. No, I take that back. I have gained. Thank you for sharing it. You choose the two toughest genres - the erotic and the short formal and you handle them masterfully.

[Quill~]

so you're the one... making me smile. :)

[Kashif Waqas Ramay]

representing a river in a jar.....wonderful

[Quill~]

:) thank you.

[MoriartyMesa]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4pflhw9QItc

thats all i got

[Quill~]

:) thank you. cool song!

[Clayton Bardwell]

I'm noticing a thread in your senryu's. They're very tasty, and well done of course.

[khalid]

no one word was missed here..some cant wait for the fruit to be riopened so they take the risk of sinning, i think it depends on the hunger that sinful feels not only how much tasty the fruit would be..

[Quill~]

:) thank you. It's true.

[Grey]

yup, a bite, a lick, a suck and a ... well, you know how to rhyme. ;) Nice job sexy one.

[Quill~]

:) you're too cute! thank you Grey!

[The 13th Eros]

The ripest fruit is sweet and succulent, while immature vines brings only bitterness. The best things in life are truly worth the wait.

[Quill~]

:) I love that thought. thank you.

[Mark]

Without the ripeness, it doesn't posess the allure.
And without allure, no attraction.

[Quill~]

:) so true. Thank you.

Have a wonderful evening.

[Mark]

Likewise

[Kaylor Mason]

Looks like a delicious flavor

[Quill~]

:) Thank you.

[Eagle Cruagh]

Thank you for the ripe peaches,
Any man who ignores ripe peaches
has a serious problem.
Thank you ,
----- Eagle Cruagh

[Quill~]

:)) Thank you.