Reason

 “Get out.” He doesn’t seem to understand. I reach into my pocket and pull out a semi automatic. His hands take to the air in a wild spasm. I love his eyes; they make me feel alive. “Get out.” He lowers a hand and fumbles for the handle, eyes never leaving mine. He can’t break my gaze. I’m holding him far too tight. Finally he manages to push open his door. I point my gun to the ground. “Get on your knees.” I want to see his $6000 suit degraded. I want it covered in the grime and filth of New York City. I want it to deteriorate to dirt and dust.

He doesn’t complain when his knees hit the pavement. His eyes plead, begging mercy. “Take the car, my wallet’s inside.” I want tears. I want his eyes to water as he realizes his death. I tilt my gun from his head to the rear of the car and fire, never breaking gaze. The sound resonates through the empty ally with only abandoned cars to witness. There they are, my tears. My water. My sustenance. I crack a smile. “I don’t particularly care for Mercedes.” The ground crunches beneath my feet as I take a step forward. I place the end of my gun at the top of his head. “This is why I am God.” The cocking of my gun startles him and I sense his fear rising, threatening to break him. To pass some threshold and send him laughing like a lunatic into his grave. “Our destinies meet and I go on. My destiny is greater. I am your destiny.” And our gaze breaks. He tilts his head to meet the ground. If there is a creator, I am the destroyer.

Reviews

[Drew Wade]

Excellently written. I like how you leave it open ended. Because, what goal does our protagonist have? That's never discussed, just some of his philosophy. It's good because it's so abrupt and undefined in a good way. What happens? Why is the protagonist doing what he does? If it doesn't leave the reader thinking, they are not reading it.

One teensy tiny complaint. Maybe it could do with more than one paragraph? Even though the paragraph doesn't seem to run on, maybe with more than just the one it will give some separation to the story and draw attention to details someone might miss if it's just one big paragraph.

[Derrian]

"Our destinies meet and I go on. My destiny is greater. I am your destiny." And our gaze breaks. He tilts his head to meet the ground. If there is a creator, I am the destroyer.

What a fantastic ending. I often find myself disappointed by philosophical statements, particularly grand ones like this, but I was very impressed by how strong, and mainly how relevant they were.

I often find young writers (such as ourselves) try taking on too much in dialogue and in philosophical ideas in their writing, but I think you handled the challenge extremely well.

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Many ancient thinkers believed that keeping an enemy alive was a far worse punishment than killing them, since once they're dead the punishment's over. I'm inclined to agree with them.

This snippet reminds me of Fight Club, a very particular scene.

I look forward to reading more soon!