Where have you been with your words that you vowed to whisper softly until they tumbled over the moon..............
Where have you been with your words
that you vowed to whisper softly
until they tumbled over the moon?
Tranquil images are all I can see
in your rhymes
that sank deep into the night
too soon.
Where are the eyes that lit up my world
and filled my pockets
with dreams of a life that shines?
I am realizing now
that what I once was
you have steadily changed
as you exhaled your lines.
Is my hope a golden thought
I love because it dwells
in my emotions
becoming a journey
where I drop to my knees,
spelling out words
then wonder where they lead
into my own circumstances?
Sometimes, when I sleep,
I glide over shells,
holding the hand of life,
forming collages, I could never forget
even when I am weary and I speak
of past things I should have forgotten
over the years.
Where have you been with your words
that make me smile in knowing
I have found my safe harbor
where I can be quiet
and revel in the tranquil images
you create
in my heart and soul?
This is achingly beautiful in its wistful yearning from start to finish. The picture of the beauty reading is, for any poet, a vision of perfection. Yet the reader is reproachful in her questioning which implies failure, even betrayal perhaps on the part of the word wielder. The voice is alomst that of life to life, life craving something more, always something more, which in the end is not there. This sadness goes to the core of all we are. A very moving poem.
I'm kind of running out of words to describe my thoughts and feelings when I am reading you poems. So here it is plain and simple:
.............Wow.
There. Got it out. Well done. This is wonderful.
Perfectly captures the yearning for another from the first word to the last. I magine this person very beautiful with fair hair and skin and electric blue eyes.
Time to stop pondering and get on with it. Our Muses will always only take us so far, at the end of the day the blank paper has to be faced. Dependancy upon a Muse for inspiration is fine, but over-dependence can be an excuse for not writing.
Soft words, softly spoken will always tumble us over the moon, as you say, but in the hard landing the writer files it all away and uses the experience, emotions raised, to change - and to write new stuff. And revel in the new discoveries that are thrown up.
You are an excellent wordsmith.
ATB
Alex.
Posted 13 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
Oh how I adore your quite essentially beautiful soul deep and visually powerful metaphorical descriptions within your poetry. It's never a moment of disappointment when seeing an RR of yours in my inbox and I feel so ashamed for not commenting on more of your work :/ a failure on my part.
Possibly your southern charm and outlook which gives way to your marvelous creativity, I'm thinking... however, wherever you find the source for this plentiful aquatic drink of extraordinaire you replenish our minds with, it's certainly a well filled spring of hope we all look to lavish ourselves within each time we take an eye to your keen writing abilities.
The meaning/theme of the poem I'm currently set on is to reckon it's about a person that finds emptiness when it comes to times when they need their lover the most, only to find that they are not there... a lover absent in a moment of need. Atleast, that's what I'm speculating it's about... interpretation, the live triple headed animal, uncertain of any path to go.
Now, I can't remember if you're also another poet who prefers writing poetry without consideration of rhythmic flow or beat so any criticism I give about this one may be subjective... Message me for more details if you wish.
Overall, really enjoyed it ^_^ definitely a remarkable and wonderful piece to rest my glance upon. Keep up the good work and hope to see more of it.
Hello, I am Neva, 4i, from Atlanta, Georgia.
My latest book and videos:
My latest book - Mailing Letters to the Moon
rm_f1st('6','182','true','false','000000','av2j3.. more..