She watches in pleasure as you push away all............
She filled your air pretending to be life-giving water Now you know that she is fire Clouding your vision of the world around you She traded your dreams for her desires
She watched with pleasure as you pushed away all To give her your undivided attention Finding fault in every move that you made Leaving you with no honorable mention
Her warmth and beauty holds you under her spell Stubbornly calling your thirst benign For what now seems like forever a day and a year Yet, of her life-giving water there is no sign
Now you find yourself longingly staring into the air Seeking a tall cool glass of respite To quench your thirst and refresh your dry spirit Restoring your dreams to your sight
Continue seeking life-giving water with great patience Breathe in with the utmost vigilant care In a vessel of a warrior fearless and wise You will find respite………… In the essence of air
Ahhh... Such a powerful message in this one Neva; one we would all do well to learn. All that sparkles is certainly not gold. You wrote this with such a perfect portrayal from the Vileness' perspective. I could almost here her utter "Muahahaha" under her breath as she bleed him dry; even taking great joy as he forsake all else for her emptiness.
Brilliant!
Posted 11 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
11 Years Ago
Thank you Veronica, I had forgotten about this one
11 Years Ago
I am reviewing from the last page of my RR's to current, unless something on the live feed grabs my .. read moreI am reviewing from the last page of my RR's to current, unless something on the live feed grabs my attention. This one was a pleasure.
A sitirring, beguiling and maybe dangerous picture... A strong warning in this poem about the perils of desire.. that is never satisfied... often gasping in the warm air
I suspect most of us have been unfortunate enough to be the 'victim' in this type of relationship, some of us even the victimiser. But who would be that honest with themselves. This poem is perfect, from the way the title draws you in with a well placed hypen, until the final line. And it doesn't let up. It is not an assault on your emotions, but rather a slow drip on them that wears you down, mirroring the may said relationships do.
I feel as if this was written for me. Of course I know that everyone goes through these types of things but this write really reached out and spoke to me. Thank you for sharing this Neva. I love it as with all your writes.
Love given only to have it slap you in the face and tell you that you are no longer wanted. Rebuilding afterward takes time and strength. This said all of that with a delicacy and beauty.
I find Myself in this position frequently as I see the best and purest motives in the "ONES" who mostly are persuading by appearance instead of heart motives...while air I will always need..."not everything that is beautiful to the eye has your best interest at heart"
...and what we want is rarely what we need. Love the visual of a tall, cool glass of respite, restoring dreams to sight. Beautiful and unerringly, unnervingly accurate, ma'am. Thank you.
Hello, I am Neva, 4i, from Atlanta, Georgia.
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My latest book - Mailing Letters to the Moon
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