Dressed in Sadness

 

My secret thoughts reside

in the backyard of my existence

where darkness cries out in shivers

clear to my bones.

I wake up to find them

packed neatly on shelves in my mind

and wish I could just crawl away,

be left alone.

They come from my emotions,

dressed in sadness

with no intention of ever comforting

what they transform.

There are days

when they make a decision

to rearrange the places I stand

until I am left without hope,

forlorn.

My secret thoughts are the lyrics of my being

which bid my heart

to walk on a white canvas

of the purest snow.

Oh the damage

that could be done

if I spoke them aloud,

my true feelings revealed

with these eyes full of woe.

I cannot bend or I'll break

so I hide on these shelves

in my mind,

packed neatly away

from all that challenges

my tree of life,

such as falling leaves.

My secret thoughts control

how my tongue refrains

from speech,

So my true feelings,

you will.....

never see.

Author's Note

Photography by Kirsty Mitchell Photography

Reviews

[Veronica Chandler]

"...so I hide on these shelves
in my mind,
packed neatly away
from all that challenges
my tree of life,..."
This piece speaks to me and I feel 10,000 emotions all at the same time. Some parts lift me and other parts weigh heavy in my spirit. As usual, when I read your work I find comfort in the softness, and contrasts.

[Neva Flores Smith - Changefulstorm]

Thank you Veronica :)

[Veronica Chandler]

My pleasure...

[Aidz]

WOW this Neva is a very different write from you and it is brilliant, love every pore that drips ink of sorrow and a truth hidden between every word... This I would like to see more of , inside Neva's essence

[Neva Flores Smith - Changefulstorm]

Thank you A :) xoxox

[Becky C Strukamp]

This is so relatable. "Secret thoughts in the backyard of my exisitence" Absolutely my favorite line. Excellent poem Neva!

[Neva Flores Smith - Changefulstorm]

Thank you Becky :)

[mandy]

wow, neva, i can relate to this! i have secret thoughts locked away, that i would NEVER reveal...what harm they could do if spoken aloud. but recently, i have found one who i can reveal a lot of them to, and that is so (healing, empowering, relieving, freeing, and just plain good.) someone i trust of course. that is a powerful, insightful write.

[Neva Flores Smith - Changefulstorm]

Thank you Mandy :)

[quinfinn]

it is sadness indeed to compartmentalize your feelings and those pieces of your life which you found to be so much less than stellar. as you have so eloquently written herein, those true feelings....so important to your identity...are never to be seen by others, which i find to be so tragic in itself. what a wonderful write you have shared here ,Neva. as always, you have touched a part of me.

[Neva Flores Smith - Changefulstorm]

Thank you QF :)

[Danielle]

Wow I can't help but feel this is how I've felt my whole life. It is like you crept into my soul and wrote from it. Lovely!

[Neva Flores Smith - Changefulstorm]

Thank you Shia :)

[Joel M Frye]

I liken this to a room of truth, where everything which is said or heard must be true and few if any get to enter. Beautifully couched, Neva.

[Neva Flores Smith - Changefulstorm]

Thank you Bear! XX

[victoria]

I regularly declutter now, never used to..I realised the other day I always hang on to the same certain things, some of which I have not looked at in years but still....I think this is true of our emotions too..we are repositories of such emotions we choose not to let go.. some locked deep away.. wonderful poetry Neva

[Neva Flores Smith - Changefulstorm]

Thank you Victoria :)

[Dr. Wood ?]

there is an ever locked room inside MY head, I am not so sure that even I want the key

[Neva Flores Smith - Changefulstorm]

Thank you Dr. Wood

[Emerald Seas]

Such a well expressed poem of what each of us hides to some degree. Can anyone be COMPLETELY honest? Really, we are human beings with so many flaws, fantasies, dreams, demands, commitments. There is no way to be completely honest and not do harm to someone (even ourselves) at some time: unintentionally, unknowingly, etc.
All we can do is our best... and hope for it all to work out in the end.
Thought provoking write!

[Neva Flores Smith - Changefulstorm]

Thank you QSS :)

[Tate Morgan]

your mind is way more ordered than mine . Mine is a mess a wreck of a place to play lol

[Neva Flores Smith - Changefulstorm]

Thanks Tate, oh wow, you don't have any shelves in there? LOL

[Tate Morgan]

Im knee deep in the hordes of useless things that i will surely need the minute i throw them away