Steady As We Go - Two

Umm didn't have a chance to go over this so there might be some mistakes. Reio's pov.

The dream was always the same. I was fifteen years old and standing outside on what was supposed to be a cold night. But there was a burning heat at my back and flecks of yellow and orange danced in my peripheral vision. The sound of roaring flames and crashing wood filled the air, and I could feel Rix‘s hand around my thin wrist.

At first I never understood what was happening, I was just a confused kid who wasn‘t living in his head at that particular moment in time. There was yelling, more yelling, and then a large, hard hand would make contact with the side if my head, and I would fall hard on a tar driveway. Rix's young voice would ring out, screaming, "He didn't mean it! Its not his fault!"

But it was my fault, and I understood that every time that hand, or a foot, or a cane would make contact with my body. I was the one who'd been playing with matches in the basement, I had lit the curtains on fire on purpose. I hated the curtains. They were red, but a wrong red, and in my immature, demented fifteen year old mind, I wanted them to be fire red. The house was gone by two am, as we lived thirty miles away from the nearest town. By the time the firemen arrived, Rix and I were almost a mile and a half from the burning house, and no one cared to come looking for us. Rix had bad burns up his left arm and on his left foot. We were both covered in soot, and sweat painted little lines down our foreheads.

And then the dream would change. It was five years later, I had just turned 20, and Rix and I were working our sixth job for Teretto. It was the only job we had ever failed. I was standing in a moist underground tunnel, all quiet except for the loud drip of water and my own ragged breathing. I held a little girl in my arms, she was no more than eight or nine years old. And she was dead, because I had gotten there too late. Only a few yards away from the tunnel opening a gunshot had rang out, then the sound of boots slamming against concrete pavement. And I stood alone with a dead girl in front if me, a pool of blood growing wide around her blonde head. I had slowly stepped towards her, and lifted her small body into my arms. I didn't know what to do, until Rix showed up, and every time he laid his hand on my shoulder my eyes would snap open.

And then I was back in my apartment bedroom, images of fire and blood living behind my eyelids until I shook them away.

That was another time Rix had told me it wasn’t my fault. On some level, I knew he was right. It wasn't my fault I was a compulsive pyromaniac, even though I had decent control over it, and it wasn't my fault Teretto had assigned us a job too big for us to handle. But I still felt the guilt, always fresh after the dream.

The bright red letters on the clock next to my bed read 3:09. Always the witching hour when I woke up. My apartment suddenly felt hot and stuffy, too small. I ripped the sheets off of my legs, and was instantly chilled. I ignored the cold and walked out of the room and out onto the balcony.

The crisp fall air helped me relax and I forcefully pushed the images left behind from the dreams away. I was always restless between jobs. I like the constant moving, the loudness of each day. That was why Rix and I had chosen to live in the city¾I needed the noise. When we used to live in the country, I got impatient, dangerous. I wasn’t proud of it, but I lashed out.

I also hated being alone, and that’s exactly what I was right now. Just like when it was quiet, I was dangerous when I was alone.

I thought about going to Rix’s apartment. It was only a couple staircases away. But I knew Rix would be moderately pissy at being woken up at such an ungodly hour, and decided against it. Then a soft meow cooed behind me. I rolled my eyes and petted the balcony railing and a familiar brown tabby cat jumped up to join me. I didn't know its name. Uncountable strays hung around this building, attracted by the continuous flow of cat food coming from Rix's apartment.

I let the small cat rub its cold wet nose all over my bare arm for half an hour before I felt calm enough to go back to sleep. I let the cat in, as New York fall was in full swing and it was cold enough that the small puffs of breath coming from the cats nose misted.

The warm creature curled up at the foot of my bed, and we were both asleep in minutes.

One thing I did appreciate about vacations was the opportunity to sleep in. In today’s case, that was until two thirty pm. The cat was gone, and I could tell Rix had been in to visit, probably on the off, off, off chance that I wanted to accompany him on his morning jog. No sooner had the thought crossed my mind than there was a knock at the door. But it wasn't Rix.

She was probably one of Teretto's assistants, judging by her tight fitting red outfit. I knew I probably looked like a morning¾no, afternoon¾ zombie, but I leaned against the door frame and gave her a smile anyway.

"What can I do for you?"

She glared. "Teretto wants to meet with you and your partner today. In half an hour." she said coldly, and then immediately turned and walked away.

When Teretto said half an hour, he meant half an hour. So Rix rode my a*s while I showered, dressed, and slumped down the stairs to the Jeep. We managed to get there five minutes early, and Rix jumped when Teretto’s secretary called our names. He got nervous when we went to see Teretto. I wasn’t necessarily the guy’s drinking buddy, but I didn’t turn into a paranoid rabbit at the sound of his name. I gave Rix a much needed pat on the back as we entered the office. Teretto was standing in front of a large, open window that had a decent view of the city. They were one way glass, I knew. Teretto wouldn’t risk getting shot while seeing the sights.

“Boys, it’s good to see you. Sit.” He said kindly, the sort of kind that a serial killer spits before he slits your throat. Pleasant thoughts.

There were three other people in the office. Two men and a woman. I recognized one of the guys, he was one of Teretto’s assistants. He was a stern, mean looking fellow, I think his name was Jorma. He narrowed his eyes at me when I gave him a smile. Jerk.

The girl seemed vaguely familiar, but I couldn’t put my finger on her. She was pretty, looking to be about seventeen or eighteen. Red hair shadowed pretty green eyes, and when I made eye contact she quickly looked away.

Rix and I sat down in front of Teretto’s desk, and he continued to stand by the window, as if contemplating something. After nearly five minutes, he finally spoke, eyes flashing.

“Rix, Reio, I have an important job for you, and trust you will execute it with efficiency. This is Arakawa Michaels, and she is willing to pay us a large sum to find her sister’s killer. Her younger sister, Serena Michaels, was killed in May of 2092. Up until this time, Ms. Michaels has been unable to find the perpetrator. Recently, however, she has discovered a lead to whom she thinks killed Serena. She would like you to pick up the slack, and bring the culprit to her. There will be files in each of your apartments when you get home. I trust the job won’t be too much for my best agents?” My heart lurched into my throat and I suppressed the cough rising. There was a malicious glint in Teretto’s eyes. He knew exactly what this case was to me and Rix: unfinished business. We had never found that little girls killer, and now I remembered where I had seen Arakawa Michaels. In the office of her father, where Rix and I had stood behind Teretto as he explained the way the job had played out. As soon as he’d said Michaels, I knew it was the same family.

“Of course not sir.” Rix said formally. He was sitting up straight, like a two by four had been shoved through the back of his jacket. I didn’t even know what I looked like, my body felt like melting metal. It was my fault we were sitting here now. My fault Teretto was putting this one our backs again. My fault Arakawa Michaels’ sister was dead at the age of eight.

“Good. That’s all. You may go.” Teretto shooed us away with his hand. Rix grabbed my jacket with cool efficiency, practically dragging me out of the room. I stumbled behind him through the red carpeted hallways, mind blank. As soon as we stepped outside I started coughing, and my head felt like it was whirling. I sat down on the sidewalk, leaning against the metallic building. It was cold out and the air was suddenly hurting my lungs.

“Reio, calm down.” Rix kneeled in front of me but didn’t touch me. We’d done this before, so many times, but nothing changed. I was having a fit and the best thing to do was to try to talk me out of it.

“S**t, Rix we can’t do this one. I am the one who killed her sister. It was me. Go tell Teretto we can’t do it.” I stuttered, almost too fast to understand.

“Teretto doesn’t let people back down on jobs. We either do it, or we die trying to finish it. That’s the way it is. And it wasn’t your fault. You know that, calm down.”

“S**t.” I breathed. “Okay, okay. Just… go away for a second.” I rubbed my eyes hard, but it made my head hurt worse. I was vaguely aware of Rix’s footsteps retreating away from me. It took a few minutes, but the city sounds eventually drowned out the swarming in my mind. I slowly stood up, using the wall for support. I looked up to see Rix about seven feet away, with his hands in his pockets and an incorruptible air of patience around him. Once he made sure I was calm, he approached me again. His lips parted to say something but the door behind his back opened.

Arakawa Michaels and the man that was with her stepped out, and stopped in their tracks upon seeing us. They were high class people, dressed in nice clothes. I guessed her purse was real snakeskin.

In comparison Rix looked quiet average, and I must have looked like a hobo. My leather jacket was worn, hair long and unkempt, and my jeans tattered. I immediately turned away. I had to let Rix deal with this one.

“Is he okay?” she asked. By all circumstances, I was guessing she didn’t know we were the ones that had failed to save her sister. She was young then, and Rix and I looked different now. We were bigger, taller, and had long hair. Her eyes had been filled with tears the only time she ever saw us.

“Yes.” He replied simply.

“Oh. Well, I just um…” she hesitated, and then started again, “I trust Teretto with matters like this, and I know he wouldn’t give us anything less than his best people.”

“Thank you Ms. Michaels.” Rix said quietly, I guessed he was smiling politely.

“No, thank you. We’ll be in touch.”

I heard the click clack of her heels retreating and could feel Rix decompressing. “Come on.” He walked away and I followed obediently and sat in the comfortable seat of the Jeep. “Are you going to be like this the whole time? I can take this one alone.”

“No.” I snapped. “I’ll calm down in a few days. Teretto did this on purpose.”

“I know he did. Maybe it’s right.” Rix was quiet for a few minutes, not secure enough in my mental stability to start driving yet. “I still dream about her.”

“Me too…you can drive now. I’m alright.”

Rix knew me through and through, and if I said I was okay he trusted me. And I was for the moment, though my head was still spinning slightly. Rix was worried, I could tell. Mine and Rix’s lives had been coasting since then, and things were good. I was happy, something I thought I would never be. When I was a kid, my parents had convinced me I would end up in an asylum, and even though Rix did his best to tell me different, I believed them. I knew there were things wrong with me, and one part tried, and succeeded, most of the time to keep those things in check. I’d gotten better over the years, but it was still there. A distant humming in the back of my mind, telling me that I could crack at any moment. If I gave in to that, my parents would be right.

When we arrived back to our condo, the documents were waiting as expected. I didn’t bother going up to my room, and instead sat on Rix’s couch while he pulled the papers out of the manila envelope. One of his cats jumped in my lap but I ignored it.

He picked up a smaller piece of ripped paper, read it, and then handed it to me. A simple statement, in Teretto’s unmistakable messy handwriting.

Confront your demons.

It was his damn mantra. Teretto might be insane, but the guy was consistent. There were certain aspects of his personality that popped up constantly, and facing your mistakes was right up there with if it shoots you shoot it back.

“Martinel Vinetti.” Rix said quietly, a frown playing out on his face. The name was familiar. The name of the man we had so miserably failed to eliminate from society. “He was seen recently in New York, apparently he’s got a big con going on.” Rix mumbled, more to himself than to me. Information tended to come in one ear and skip right out the other. Not this time though. I listening intently to Rix’s words, absorbing every piece of information that could take us on the fastest path to Vinetti. I wanted him dead as quickly as possible. I didn’t even care about the money this time.

I stayed in Rix’s apartment until he was finished reading the documents, and then retreated to my own place, feeling desperately exhausted. As soon as I laid down my mind started reeling once again. It was obvious that Teretto had specifically chosen us for this case, knowing it was our job to wrap it up.

But Vinetti was powerful, and he was smart. He surrounded himself with dozens, maybe hundreds of agents and men who were willing to give their lives up for him at any moment. We had learned a lot about the inner workings of Vinetti’s crew the first time we tried to kill him, but chances were they had changed things. They had little tolerance for infiltration, and had shot people for eyeing them a bit too closely. I sensed many dangerous run ins in the near future, and as much as I liked a good scuffle, I wouldn’t enjoy any of these.

The next day I woke up with a killer headache and in a worse mood than usual. I popped a couple painkillers and stumbled down the stairs to meet Rix. He was still in the shower when I unlocked his door with my key, a testament as to how much this case was going to mess me up. I didn’t wake up this early without forced action, and today I was up and at ‘em before Rix.

He stepped out of the shower wrapped in a towel, hair still spaghetti like, and gave me a confused glance.

“Just give me a few minutes.” He said somberly, digging some jeans and a t-shirt out of his drawer. He changed, and blew his hair dry. I was surprised he didn’t try to start a therapy session. Usually when I did something out of the ordinary, he took full notice and got me to explain why word for word, to make sure I was okay.

This time, I think he just accepted the fact that I wasn’t okay, and that there wasn’t much he could do about it until we finished this job.

After slipping on a warm jacket and hat, we sulked outside to the Jeep to get started on our first lead. Rix had sacrificed the last few days of his vacation to start this job. He said he wouldn’t have been able to enjoy it with this on his mind anyway. That was his excuse, because he would have been able to relax at least a little bit. If I wasn’t kept busy with something like this case on my mind, I would lose it, and Rix would never sacrifice my mental stability for his own comfort.

We drove the short fifteen minutes into the heart of the city, parking our car in one of the Underground’s garages. New York was bundled up, as hobos wearing blankets as coats and stylish girls in scarves walked up and down the streets. Fall had come quick this year, was already freezing into winter. It wouldn’t be long before Hudson Bay froze.

Our first lead was a woman named Ruiza Clarck, an apparent ex-mistress of Vinetti’s. We met her at an upscale restaurant, and felt immediately out of place. It seemed we were never dressed well enough for our job…

The atmosphere was dark, and I had to squint to make out faces. The chairs were made of mahogany and accented with a deep red velvet. Highly dressed individuals were seated around tables in handsome suits and glamorous dresses. A few women gave my ripped jeans disdainful glances.

“We can’t afford to take a piss in this place, Rix.” I mumbled to him as a waiter led us to meet our date. He was put off by our attire, but someone had paid him handsome fee to let us in without our black ties. We weren’t surprised to find Clarck in the dark, smoky, sultry VIP section of the restaurant. She was the type of pretty that needed make-up to hide the damaged person on the inside. Dark brown waves curled around her skinny cheeks, and her lipstick was too red. As she stood up to greet us, though, I couldn’t deny she had a nice body. Probably plastic surgery, though.

“Hello boys, nice to meet you. It’s about time someone made a real effort to stick a bullet in Vinetti’s brain.” Ruiza said in a low, seductive voice. She had an accent, Scandinavian, I thought. Rix and I sad down across from her, and I sat back to let him do the talking. I listened intently, but usually when I tried to get involved in these kinds of conversations I say stupid things. I wasn’t much of a people person.

“Nice to meet you too, Ms. Clarck.” Rix said politely, obviously wanting to keep the meeting on the level. Ruiza, however, seemed to have multiple agendas as I had noticed her give the both of us elevator looks. I was guessing Ruiza liked the bad boys. Rix kicked me in the shin, obviously knowing the direction my mind was traveling. South.

“Vinetti is a dirty scoundrel, and powerful. It will be dangerous to the both of you to get involved in this.” Ruiza said, and I was surprised she seemed as concerned.

“We’re aware.” Rix replied, “But this case hits kind of close to home for us. We want him out of this world as much as anybody, and you’re our first lead. What do you know?”

“He arrived back in the city just under two weeks ago, with his entire entourage. As far as I know, he’s on business.”

When Rix and I remained silent, she continued.

“I don’t know his exact location, but I’m confident it’s somewhere on the outskirts on the East Side of the city. He’s not showy, and likes to hide himself well, considering how many people like you are out to get him. He will probably stay in a hotel under a fake name, or a small cottage or house. I would try to get back in touch with him, but he would have me killed.”

Rix and I didn’t stay long after that. Normally, I would have lived it up on Ruiza’s budget, indulging in the finest wine and hors d’oeuvres. Not today though. My mind was still buzzing, and Rix new it. This case would be slow, steady going, mostly for my sake. I could feel my mind weakening, and I tried as best I could to keep my face normal, to ignore the buzzing. I tried to push down the feeling rising inside me like bile, the feeling that I wanted to lash out, to hurt someone. It was something inherent in me, and something that I was in delicate control of. Rix was the only one that could keep me straight, and both of us knew that.

And that was why our lives would only always be semi-independent. I could probably go a few days without Rix keeping me in check, but anything more than that… If I died, Rix would be free for the first time in his life, but as much as I liked to tell myself he didn’t consider me a burden, I still felt it. It was a sharp sting I’d brought up many times, but Rix would just look at me with quiet brown eyes. He never mentioned what would happen if he died, or for some reason couldn’t watch me anymore. I’d thought the situation out many times. Within a week I’d either be dead with a bullet from a police officer’s gun or in an asylum, that is assuming Teretto wouldn’t look out for me. That was something I wasn’t going to rely on.

I consistently told myself things were better, though. Middle school was the worst. After a slew of detentions and suspensions, I was finally expelled for fighting. Or rather, me beating someone significantly less able to defend themselves within an inch of their life. Rix had tried to explain to them several times that if they could just put him in classes with me, I’d behave. But they didn’t listen, and wouldn’t let either of us sacrifice our education for the other’s sake.

That’s what had led to the fire, I think. I was home all day, every day, with Rix’s parents and my mother, all of whom considered me nothing more than a rat. Those days, Rix would make me breakfast, and I wouldn’t eat again until dinner, because I couldn’t make myself food. Most of the time, my mom would lock me in my room, or in the basement, anything to get me out of the way.

I was a different person now, but even if I had been a normal kid back then, I would have wanted to burn that house down.

Hell, if I could go back, I’d do it all over again.