Chapter 1

the start

I let out a small sigh, pulling myself onto the bus. It was early in the morning so not many people were around, but that was no surprise since no one in their right mind would want to get up at this time. School always threw off my schedule, but it didn’t help that I hadn’t gotten any sleep for the past few days. The other day I discovered that my recently deceased brother, Jace, had been murdered rather than his death being an accident. They prevented us from doing our funeral and took his body away, I couldn’t remember the last time I freaked out that bad.

It took a while for mother to calm me down before we could go home. I locked myself in my room and refused to go out. I never cried, not even once, even with how attached I was to my older brother there just wasn’t any tears to be shed. Just the pure shock had made my body collapsed into shivers and it wasn’t until three days after, that my father told me to get up and go to school or there would be consequences.

There were multiple reasons as to why I didn’t want to go to school, all of them good ones. First of all; the town I lived in was small on the coast of California. Everybody knew everyone, so if something happened it didn’t take long for everyone to catch on. Especially when we were getting into the winter months, for some reason it was the time for gossip. So that meant everyone would be asking me questions. Asking if I was okay, even if we weren’t friends, it confused me and I never liked being the center of attention in the first place.

Yet, that was how the world worked. It was my senior year of high school and if I didn’t go the money fine would be on me now that I was eighteen. I didn’t want to worry my parents, after all, they were dealing with enough troubles. I wanted to try and distract myself so badly, but all that I could assume was how useless I felt in all this. Renea the police officer taking the case is an old childhood friend of my mothers,

2

she’s sort of like my godmother. Making my parents very involved in trying to find out who murdered their son.

    As the bus rolled across the road I stopped thinking about it. What I did need to concentrate on was getting my school work caught up, along with attempting to avoid people bombarding me with any questions and making me have a panic attack again. Sometimes I just wished I would wake up the next morning and realize this was just some sort of sick dream. My older brother would be waiting to drop me off at school before he went to work to support his wife and son. Yet, in the back of my head, I knew that would never happen. There wasn’t a way to bring the dead back to life.

    I stepped off the bus as it arrived at the front of the school. Pulling my backpack further up my left shoulder before giving a small shiver. I was wearing my jacket and scarf, but seeing my breath leave my mouth was fascinating if anything at all. Breathing into my hands I rubbed them together for warmth and walked towards the front gate looking at the sign above me, Little Woods high school.

    The crowd wasn’t too bad, though I saw a few groups looking at me for a moment. As I had figured word travelled fast and now I was stuck in a dark pit of prying curious eyes. As if they were a den of lions and I was their prey, just staring and waiting for me to drop dead to attack me with their questions. It sent shivers down my spine as I stood in the quad. The school was separated into three sections.

    My first class was located to the b wing in the back of the school. It was class 3b, the farthest one against the fence. English and I had never wanted to get to class so fast in my life before. I was even hoping I wouldn’t run into someone I knew, attention was not what I needed. It was distraction and possibly never ever bringing up the concept of my brothers death into a conversation. The stress was just too great, I probably would pass out and that wasn’t a stretched lie.

3

   

It was harder to avoid people than it was to interact with them. That said something considering interacting with the human race was difficult anyway. Getting into class was the easy part, and my anxiety died down a little when we got on with the lesson. I wasn’t eager to learn, but I was willing to distract my mind even if it was for only an hour. Anyone who even whispered among each other towards me, I ignored it. So maybe I thought it’d be better that way. Yet it almost looked like me ignoring it was just making people worry more and even comment more on my behavior. Either way it was a lose lose situation.

The day at school wouldn’t go quick enough. I held my breath for what felt like ages - until that end of the day bell rang. Not even stopping to say a rushed goodbye to my normal group of friends. They should figure how I was feeling considering the situation. Quickly climbing onto the bus I was eager to get home. My heart pounding against my chest. I didn’t know why I was so eager either. It wasn’t as if something amazing awaited me at home. Jace wouldn’t be there to visit as he usually did. I could only imagine how his wife felt, how it would feel for their son to now grow up without his dad. I ignored those thoughts creeping on me. Letting my mind sit blank as I could until I reached my front door. For a moment I even hesitated.

Opening the door the words I’m home got caught in my throat. What bothered me was the odd quiet nature of the house at the moment. There was no lights on and what seemed to be no one around. Entering the main hallway, I turned to the kitchen to the left in the open corridor. The large kitchen and dining room had plenty of space. My finger searched for the light before clicking it on and my eyes instantly saw the note on the fridge. Written in my mother's handwriting. I adjusted my backpack, grabbing the note to read it.

‘We’ve gone with Renea to check a few things out, dinners in the fridge.’ Anger welled up inside me. It wasn’t often that my parents weren’t home after school. Mainly to make sure I was okay. I knew they were adults and they could do what they wanted but there was a part of me that was upset over the fact they left to explore my brother’s death without me. I was eighteen - I could handle myself. There wasn’t a truth that would bother me I simply just wanted to know what happened.

I crumpled the note between my hands before throwing it into the trash. Letting the lid crash down to satisfy my anger a bit. I took a deep breath for a moment, trying to get a hold on myself as I swallowed. Really it felt like they didn’t trust me with anything. I was close with Jace so it surprised me how they’d react in such a way. My resolve could have been the best thing to have on a murder case.

Ignoring the thoughts I stomped up the stairs towards my bedroom. At the end of the hallway to the right. My parents room was to the left more towards the middle of the hallway. Opening my door I threw my backpack off to the side and flopped myself onto my bed on the right side of the room. Staring at the window in front of me. I hadn’t planned on sleeping but I soon drifted not even realizing how emotionally tiring this all could really be.

I don’t think I dreamt of anything. My mind was filled with a dark blackness as if my brain had simply shut itself off. I wasn’t woken up until my alarm for school the next day went off on my phone. Quickly silencing it I shot out of bed and groaned. My body didn’t feel rested at all. It took all of the will power that I had to crawl out of bed to start to crawl towards my door. I could hear my parents shuffling on the floor below. I tried to ignore it, getting ready for school as I usually did.

I walked down the stairs, stopping right at the end of the hallway where it connected with the kitchen. I overheard my mother saying something. Her voice was strained as if she was trying to prove a point in an argument. The same went for my dad and I pushed myself towards the wall trying to hear what they were saying.

“Why are you trying to blame this all on me?” My father would say as my mom moved closer to him.

“Maybe if you hadn’t let him drive home that night he wouldn’t have died Kenneth. Do you really even care at all?” I looked over for a moment and could see that my father had stiffened.

“Don’t care? DON’T CARE GENESIS, this is our only son we’re talking about! You know how much we loved him you knew how much SAM cared about him. Don’t you dare go accusing me of not caring when I’m only trying my best!” He hissed, I winced slightly sinking back for a moment. My father was hot tempered but not usually violent which my mother seemed to handle fairly well at times. I didn’t want to hear anymore though. Slipping past the opening I tried to head out the door without much sound.

Once the cold air hit my skin, I took in a deep breath and tried to relax my shoulders. Tapping the end of the door handle, I made a split rash decision. I wouldn’t be going to school today. I was just going to wander around town. What brought that on I didn’t know but I walked down the street and stopped at the edge. Watching as my school bus crawled away with all those kids inside it. Following the bus until I reached the edge of the main town hall. Turning towards it I picked up my pace. The icy ground wasn’t going to stop me.

I couldn’t run away, but I could feel like I could. Letting go of my backpack straps that I usually held onto I started to run down the street. I was too wrapped up in my own thoughts to see the boy walking out of the garden. Trying to stop myself I couldn’t get traction. Slipping and falling straight into the taller man before falling on my butt to the ice below. I smiled rather sheepishly as the blue eyed man looked to me. He looking not a day older than me. He was rather handsome, with thick short blond hair and well dressed as well. Well, more well dressed than most kids these days. As we made eye contact he spoke to me.

“I’m sorry are you alright? Let me help you up?”

Author's Note

Please please help me out. This is my first serious project that I would like publish sometime this year. So any advice you can give me is great! Grammar issue's especially. I hope you all enjoy the story as well.

Reviews

[barleygirl]

First, let me give my deep regrets for your having lost your brother. This is a very compelling story & it needs to be written. I think it might be harder & take longer to be published, however, unless you get a good editor to help with the grammar/spelling/punctuation issues. I'm sorry I haven't been on this website in a few months, so I might be too late for making detailed suggestions on this piece. Let me know if you still would like some help in this area.

With all that said, now let me just tell you that your writing is mostly good in construction & very excellent in the manner of expression, being so forthright about this painful topic, showing your honest feelings. I started out thinking this had a lot of TELLING & it could use more SHOWING or dialogue. Then later I saw that you started using dialogue, so that's when it started feeling more like a story than a journal. All in all, I feel this is a great project for you.

[Centipedle]

This is a fictional story - just written in first person. I've gotten quite a few reviews on it and it's a long way off from being worked on now xD I have commissions to worry about first and I've been looking to actually just go intoa poetry book with collab stuff

[Jcarson237]

Working on some edits for you, Didn't have the time for the whole piece but shoot me your email or any place I can send some revisions. Keep writing! :)

[Centipedle]

[email protected]

It's an email I use for all my writing stuff! It's greatly appreciated ^^

[T.S. Sky]

A few run on sentences but overall a great story.