The Water's Edge

Kids play on the edge....

“GO!”

“NO!!!  YOU go!”

Pushing the younger boys out of his way, PJ broke through to the edge and went.

All the other  boys stayed still, jaws hung open.

It was a long fall.  Much longer than it looked.  PJ had been free floating for seconds upon seconds, but it seemed to be days upon days.  Finally, a splash was heard from below.  A few sighs were heard among the shuffling of feet.

“You’re next!” said Lucy as she pushed her little brother off the edge of the cliff.  The boy immediately fell forward and decided if he was going down this cliff, he’d go down in style.  He swan-dived to the sea below.

“Lucy!!!” Ellen yelled.  “PJ hasn’t even come up yet, what the hell….”

Ellen’s voice was overcome by the sounds of applause rolling along the echoing canyon.  PJ had resurfaced.  Then, slowly, one person at a time began to notice, he wasn’t moving.

Lucy and Ellen stood arm in arm saying silent prayers for their brother.  Silently, one by one, the others dispersed, leaving the girls alone on the edge.

This time, when the body broke back up through the water’s edge, no one applauded.

 

Author's Note

I feel suddenly wicked. hmmmm.

Reviews

[Rain]

It is one of a parents hardest decisions. How far up the tree should you let them go? How far away can they ride their bike? This is a great piece that reflects the recklessness of youth, and how hard it is to be a good parent. It's a very sad and compelling story. How many times, as a youth, did you throw your fate to the wind? Excellent write. Rain..

[TL Boehm]

vintage wicked. How did I miss this gem. This is true horror. Like sick to the stomach horror and yet no monsters or vampires or deranged murderers. Just children and nature. Terrifying.

[michael]

It is Death grinning
When Joy begins,
And in the end
He will be singing....

I thought your write was very good. It was the every-
day funtime, then the conclusion hits you in the face.
I loved it!

[Denni]

this is really interesting! i love the suspense, at first i thought this would be a happy story, so i was shocked when the boy turned up dead. keep up the greatness

[Lena M. P.]

Caught me unaware. I thought this was going to be a fun story, bringing back good times in youth. Then WHAM; you slapped me sideways. Good punch. The stuff parents nightmares are made of. You were feeling wicked weren't you :)

[Nick Erickson]

Ya know, I think you beat me out. This one got me by surprise. I was expecting the happy-go-lucky-summertime-kids story... Very good and surprising ending. The length of the piece is very appropriate.
Well done.

[Samuel Dickens]

Yikes. I thought it was going to be one of those happy summertime tales, but it wasn't too happy. We did that kind of stuff when I was young, but no one ever got hurt. I did hear about a kid hitting his head on a rock, though. Oh, I do sense a little streak of wickedness.

[Emily Elizabeth]

Scary, haunting, awesome, short but sweet! You are such a talented writer, you pack so much tension and creativity in such a short space! It was sooo sinister, kind of like a kid's story gone terribly terribly wrong!
I love it! It'd make such a good short film too

[Lola Nation]

startling beginning! Great suspense!!!

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Well I must say you captured just how child's play can turn tragic in a moments notice though you left the ending to the imagination... wonderfully written.