Cesspool Sector Rescue

Chapter 9

“I hate this sector!” the official loudly shouted from deep in the sewers of Sector 17, the dirtiest and most unkempt sector without a doubt. The official was wandering its odorous sewers looking for an exit, without a cadet to help him. He grimaced and held his snout as he trudged through its contaminated halls. How could something this deplorable happen to someone of his status?

40 minutes earlier…

The official was sitting in the cafeteria of his large office building, where he, his cadets, and other various workers ate lunch. He had ordered a favorite of his, spaghetti and meatballs. With a bib tucked neatly into his business suit, and fork in one hand and a shaker of cheese in the other, he awaited with much excitement. After a reason wait, the chef came out with his dinner.

“Your dinner, sir!” the chef said with a smile.

“Thank you!” the official said repetitively.

“Enjoy your meal, your kingship.” The chef said with a bow and walked back into the kitchen. The official took the cheese shaker and shook a hardy amount of the stuff all over the meal. Unexpectedly, a hefty man at the nearby table forcefully sneezed. So powerful it was that it blew a meatball right off the official plate and it rolled out the exit.

“My meatball!” The official yelled, he reached for it, but it had already left the building. Just then a medic stood up on his table and declared, “Attention everyone, the meatball has left the building.” and nobody cracked a smile. The official hurried out the exit to retrieve it. “My meatball!” he repeated as he watched it roll down the steel sidewalk past more than a few citizens. The official screamed to the baffled citizens, “Seize my meatball! Don’t just stand there! I need that meatball!” His cries just caused the unlucky citizens who were outside that day to become even more bewildered.

The official began to look even rasher as he pursued the insignificant meatball down the street. People began to gawk and chuckle at him while he shrieked for help to capture the ball of red meat. Spherical in shape and meat-like in appearance, the meatball bounced and rolled all the way to a sewer grate and slipped through an opening with ease. Moments later the official stood over the grate and sighed.

“Most officials would simply quit and go back to their offices in this situation. Lucky for the citizens of this sector, I am not such an official! I don’t turn away from a challenge such as this.” He stood proud and was met with many a cheer. People saluted him in the streets. “I will travel down into the sewer system to rescue my meatball, not because it is easy, but because it is mine, and what is mine, is my meatball!” He lifted the grate off with his bare hands and began down into the depths of the dank territory known as the sewer.

“Where am I?” the official said quietly. This region was dark and unfamiliar. Everything was made of cement rather than steel or chrome. He looked around saw only dark cement tunnels and a murky river. He was regretting the decision to come down here, this was the type of domain that rats and large arthropods dwelled. However, the official couldn’t go back to the surface now, he would look like a coward.

He had no choice but to continue the search for his meatball, no matter how stupid or unwarrantable it seemed now. It was a completely different world down here. “How am I going to find my meatball in this place?” he said softly “No matter. Meatballs are delicious.” he decided.

He took his first step and was immediately aggravated. He found out that he had stepped in a repulsive green sludge, and he couldn’t lift his foot up from the spot where the sludge had settled. The official was now curious. He needed to find out what this substance was, and the only way he could do that was to taste it. He stuck his finger in the mass of sludge and retrieved a small sample of the slime. He licked the finger and noticed that his tongue was starting to tingle. This slight tingle turned into an extreme sting.

“This certainly smarts!” the official screamed as he took off deeper into the sewer, not really paying attention to where he was going. He made a lot of turns and swam part of the way. After a while the stinging subsided and the official looked around. “Now where am I?” he said seriously. He looked down a very wide tunnel and saw what appeared to be buildings, the sounds of vehicles and the glow a city gives off, only this city was below the surface. Although he had never visited it in person, the official knew this was Sector 17, or as it was better known as by most citizens, the cesspool.

“I hate this sector!” the official loudly shouted from deep in the sewers of Sector 17, the dirtiest and most unkempt sector without a doubt. The official was wandering its odorous sewers looking for an exit, without a cadet to help him. He grimaced and held his snout as he trudged through its contaminated halls. He started growling in hopes someone would come help him, but this didn’t work.

Despite being unsanitary, Sector 17 was the largest of all the sectors, for its sewer system spanned underneath all the sectors. However, it also had the fewest number of citizens, because obviously very few people wanted to live there. The official was at least relieved to finally happen upon some form of civilization. All he had to do was find the Sector 17 official to give him directions. He headed for his office building and knocked on his door.

“Hello?” a sniffling voice said quietly, “Can I help you?” it sounded closer. The door slowly opened and out came the official of Sector 17. He was a stout man with a mop of black hair and a large thick moustache that covered his mouth. He wore round glasses and a dingy brown cloak. His skin suggested he had jaundice. “Oh hello!” he said when he recognized who it was that came to his building. The official smiled with a bit of embarrassment, he never visited the other officials. He wasn’t really the social type.

“Uh…nice sector ya got down here.” He began “I got lost in the sewers, looking fer my meatball, could you show me the way back to the surface?” he waited.

“Um… No!” the official of Sector 17 chuckled, “I think it’d be a lot funnier to watch cadets from your sector to come down here and rescue you. Surely they’ll bring a camera crew. Then I’ll be on TV!” the stout official giggled through his moustache. It was soon made obvious that this official never left his sector much either, and he’d rather have people come down here to visit him, in other words, he craved attention.

“You’re a jerk.” the official stated.

The Sector 17 official simply laughed to himself and shut the door, and a few moments later he looked at the official through his window and waited patiently for the rescue teams and news crew to arrive.

“I’m waiting.” he smirked.

Meanwhile back at the official’s sector, a news broadcast was airing on all channels. “During some sort of meatball endeavor into the sewer system, the official appears to have gotten lost in one of the hundreds of poorly maintained tunnels. The official of Sector 17 says he has not seen the official and if he did, we would be the first sector to know.” the broadcaster stated, reading off a teleprompt, “There will more updates on this story as they become available.”

“Oh come on! This is ridiculous, all you’re doing is causing hubbub!” the official watched the broadcast from Sector 17 official’s office. The grubby official walked over to a wooden table with moldy food and other pieces of rubbish can in the corner of the room and began speaking to them, “Heh…Who would have thought the official’s failures could be so funny?” he asked the garbage. He pulled out a rotten corn dog and started to eat it robustly.

“Hey man! That’s just sick!” snarled the official. The sickening noises coming from the grimy official as he devoured the historic corn dog appalled him even more.

The Sector 17 official looked over at the snouted monster who had just insulted him in his own dojo. “G-G-G-GET OUT!” he stammered. “Get out of my office now!”

“But…but I’m lost. Where am I supposed to go!?” asked the official.

“Hole in the ground!” yelled the filthy official.

The official waited for help. He knew sooner or later his cadets would come here looking for him, bringing the news crew with them. He’d look like an idiot on TV yet again, unless he could somehow use his powerful snout to get out of this mess.

“That’s it!” he exclaimed “I’ll just follow my big ol’ snout! My snout has never misled me before! ”

“Have I ever misled you?” his snout slyly asked.

“Uh…yeah.” The official growled “I guess, theoretically, I could just follow my big ol’ snout to get back to my sector.”

The official waved goodbye to the dirty official of Sector 17 and was on his way back to civilization. Back where the food was good and the air was fresh sometimes. He walked a total of two feet when he heard the sound of the rescue crew parading down the main tunnel.

“We found you! Oh, we found you!” they shouted with glee and relief. A small boy with his shirt tucked into his pants pointed at the official and said “Don’t go wandering around in the sewer, mister!” Everyone laughed, except for the official, who didn’t appreciate being scolded by this little snot.

Just then the official of Sector 17 came bouncing out of his office and waved his arms in front of the cameras. “I’m on TV! I’m on TV!” he hollered, “I’m on TV! I’m on TV!”

prev chapter