I say, this is war

The skeletons in my closet,

Whispers turn into screams. 

A battle so bloody,

No war between thousands of men could compare. 

A body so worn out,

From the constant screaming and pleading.

Watching everyone leave,

driving right out of the driveway. 

A cold embrace,

Is this what you made?

A place to become a war zone,

Battling one on one.

Demons vs. Human

This is what this house contains.

A war of sadness,

troubled mind. 

Sad they were never going to leave,

What lies they split.

Convinced a monster lived in that one room,

No one ever visited.

A war,

Goes on everyday.

Inside someone's mind,

Yet, our men go out, while our teenagers and young adult have to suffer from a war greater inside their minds.

Author's Note

We tell our men to fight for their home,when our kids lose their safety inside their heads over minute.

Reviews

[PurpleQuartz]

I think this was very thought-provoking. You did an excellent job at writing it.

[Caitlin Rhea]

Thank you.

[Wolfwind]

This piece, other than a few spelling errors, is a good poem. It came across to me in three different ways.

The first is the voice of someone who's lived a young life that was filled with lots of social interaction, lots of warmth and many smiles, but as they got older, many of those people left to fufill their own desires, dreams or goals. Thus it left the one remaining feeling alone and isolated.

The second is about the fears people have and create when a situation is not what they wish for. Every one grows up having their own idea of what life should be like and when things don't turn out that way, it can creat alot of stress, turmoil and pain. Yet, the level of this pain and fear is entirely determined by the individual inner strength and will power to be able to see the wider view of life. It is the issue that arrises comonly when one is going form a world where they were the center to a world where they are just a piece of the universe.

The final thought that hit me was based both from the poem, but from your authors note as well. You have equated the concept of a grown man going off to war with the normal process of people you know moving or leaving your imediate area. These are in no way equal. One is duty and work, while the other is simply one of the minor emotional let downs that comes along with life. After all... a man going off to war... or to work in any dangerous field... they are putting their lives on the line... while the teenager at home is still safe.

I can understand the tone and meaning you crafted the poem about and in that you did really well. Yet, I can't help but voice... it's just one view of life, in a world that has billions.

Great Ink! It did what a good poem does, it elicites are reaction. =)

Aaron

[SquinklaPsyOps]

Very nice work, the poem starts excellent where the author describes scenario then concludes towards where the author wants the reader to emphasize the whole interpretation, domestic family management.

[Caitlin Rhea]

Thank you, but domestic family management? That wasn't what I was going for. I was going for being left behind by family and friends. But, I guess you can read and take what you think from it.