Sing and dance till the end

Old poem written when I was young and questions all things. I learn we are in-charge of our life. Best walk the good road. Written in 1981.

                       
              Sing and dance till the end

The rain is pouring down.
The dusk of the day had passed and gone.
I tossed the empty tequila bottle inside a open trashcan.
Austin, Texas is quiet.
I sat and waited for the coffee shops to open.
Better to be wet then drive drunk to Fort Hood..

I looked at the sky.
Prayed to God for answers to my questions.
The rain fell upon my face.
I saw a phone.

I went to the phone.
I dialed  the operator.
A young woman answered.
I told her "I wanted to speak to God?
I need the phone number to God?'"

The operator paused a second.
Spoke without much thought.
"God is unlisted. Only a friend can give God a call."

I told her.
"My call is important. I must hear his voice.
I must know he gives a damn."

The Operator spoke strongly.
" God phone number is unlisted. Give him a prayer.
He may be listening."

I told her.
" I prayed. He didn't listen.
I think he has forgotten us. I think he has left us."

The Operator with a stern voice .
"Maybe God is busy. You may get lucky. Keep praying."

I heard a clink.
The line is silence.
I walked the quiet streets of Austin in the rain.
A ringing sound appears in my head.
The sound whispered  sounds and voices.
"God is busy. He is drinking tequila with the Angels in Mexico.
He is saying it is too late for man.
Maybe it is a good day to die is singing in my head."
 
I went to downtown Austin.
I like the lights of the city.
Create a strange warmth.

I like the night people.
Few clean people roamed late at night.
You can buy love for a time. You can buy love for the night.

So many stories.
People confused and lost roaming the destine streets.
I asked a lone man standing in the darkness of a corner.
"Did he know the phone number to God?"

He told me.
"Unlisted, only for the pure and the innocent to know."
He give me a big smile. He whispered. "I heard he drinking tequila with
the Angels in Monterrey, Mexico. He is waiting for the end."
The man took my hand. With fear in his eyes he told me.
"A fine day to die."

I leave the man.
He reached in his coat and gave me a toast with his cheap whiskey.
He yelled at me.
"Don't look for God. You will find him and be disappointed."

I become more confused by the second.
I sat in the park by the Austin river.
The bright light of the city is surrounding me.
I stood on the park bench and I yelled.
"God, do you care?"

I looked down.
A  young woman is watching me.
She was young and her eyes were old.
She asked could she  sit with me.

I asked her.  "Why was she here with me."
She answered. "I came to Austin to find beauty and a better place.
I found only a dirty and a cold world. I see you have reach your end too.
Let sit together."

I brought her close to me on the bench. I held her tight. Her soft sad eyes
looked into my eyes. She told me. " You remind me of a lost love. He got
lost in the booze and drugs. He is gone now."

I looked into her brown eyes. I asked her." Does she know the phone number to God?
She looked at the ground and brought her face close to my face. She told me.
"God has left us a long time ago.  Man's deeds were too much for him. He killed off the sea and the sky. Man's killed his brothers without thought. He twisted-up religion to allow killing. He is in Mexico with the Angels. He is saying it is a good day to die."

I brought the young woman closer.
I felt the warmth of her body near. Her soft hands in my hands bring a spark
of hope for a second. Then I become cold again.

I closed my eyes.
I saw a number. I got up and told her. "I know God's phone number."

She smiled.
A smile of pity. She said nothing as I ran for then phone. I dialed the number.
The phone rings and a operator voice appeared.
"I'm sorry the line has been disconnected.  God has took a trip.
Don't leave no messages. He is in Monterrey, Mexico drinking
tequila at the Holiday Inn waiting for the end of time."
 
I fell down.
The phone is hanging. I looked up.
The young woman reached her hands out to me. Pulled me into her arms.
She caressed my face with tender and soft hands.

She told me. "I'm sorry you didn't get hold of God. I tried to find God many times.
I saw what you saw. I felt what you yearn for. God is busy. He is drinking tequila with the Angels at the Holiday Inn in Monterrey waiting for the end."

She kissed my hands and my lips. Told me. "I know I'm ugly with disappointment.
You are not so pretty any more. Let's trick God and the Devil. Let's sing and dance till the end of time. Let's pray the tequila run out and God will taste the bitterness of this world."

I returned the kiss to her. Told her. "Today we will drink and dance. Don't look like a good day to die today. The Devil has won the battle. We will celebrate this day. Sing and dance till the end. We will laugh and try to find some pleasure."

My brown eyes girl gave me a smile. I heard her laughter for the first time. We walked in the dawn of  Austin morning.

We stop by the Austin River. She told me. "I will walk into hell or heaven with my arms wide open. Come with me my sad man. Let's dance and sing till the end."

Two strangers walked into the city hand in hand. Sometime little hope is better then none.

                                  Coyote
                               1981
 

Author's Note

This was a bad time in a life. Young and trying to understand life. I have 15 books of poetry of questions during this time. Most of the question are still not answered. Any error. Please help.

Reviews

[Becky C Strukamp]

This poem speaks so loud and clear of how one may feel when disappointments, tragedies and such enter our life and we wonder why, why does God let this happen? Why why why. When our lives continue to spiral downward, we sometimes do think God is not listening, You penned this beautifully. I love the way you are trying to get God's number to no avail, you dont give up your journey, you continue, A truely amazing poem. I Loved it. Your imagery again, so vidid, lurring us along with you. Magnificent write.

[Trisha]

the one thing beautiful about the phone line to God is that its always there and once your willing to connect, the phone lines appear. What a beautiful way to emanate the love that you connect with.

[The Analog Kid]

This is so intimate a story my friend, Coyote. I only wish I kept records like you have in your poetry. We have all been there. Thank you for a tear-jerker:)

[Grakercub]

I really felt like i was traveling along with you on this lonely night. I could sense the desolations and determination in your voice. This poem really spoke to me. I've always pondered what God's phone number might be to tell him how hopeless this world really seems and you struck that disappointment in not finding him perfectly. But what came out even more strongly was the fact that in the end the hopelessness doesn't matter, because in embrace and humanity lies the true meaning of hope. One person can change you. Bravo, my friend.

[Judy Ponceby]

I can feel the pain and the need for answers throughout this work, Coyote. Well expressed, and I hope you knew you weren't alone in all the questioning you had.

[joshua deathdealer]

This is amazing. Love the title and the feel is incredible. I like the night people xx

[Star Wolf]

A wonderful tale with a not so bad ending. This really great storytelling. I enjoyed reading this very engaging story. Sometimes hope is everything. Hope is very powerful.

[Marie Harrison]

Your writing blew me away!
I really enjoyed the story
and especially the ending.

[Plagued Monumentally]

I could feel the powerful emotions flowing through as I read each line of this beautiful poem. Although I think that this was more of a story type, it was a fantastic read. I loved the way you captured the audience with the operator phone call. It reminded me when my grandma passed away and I prayed to God, or whoever was listening to take the sadness off of my shoulders. Eventually everything just didn't work out that way, but I still carried the belief of God out there just because I was hoping one day something would come out of my beliefs and there would be proof that he exists.

I didn't find it, and I was a child then. I still kind of believe in God, because when others are upset, I often refer to him (sometimes, if they aren't atheists). But other than that, I don't believe in him. But back to your poem! It was so lovely, I know that I'll be remembering this poem for many years to come. And near the end, when the little bit of romance came in, I knew that this was a remarkable piece. Near the middle, I didn't think that it would get any better, but you proved me wrong! Excellent poem, Coyote. Keep up the good work.

[Sakib]

Awesome!!! This is so good!! Amazing write. I am touched. I loved it.
Thanks for sharing. :)

[Dahlia Phoenix]

Wow...this is incredibly detailed and I love at the beginning where you call the operator to speak to God as if he was one of us which he isn't. A prayer may be small whoever anyone is but actually can make a difference in what we ask for even if it means in a very unusual way.

"I know I'm ugly with disappointment.
You are not so pretty any more. Let's trick God and the Devil. Let's sing and dance till the end of time. Let's pray the tequila run out and God will taste the bitterness of this world."

That was probably the best lines I've ever read cause they oppose one another.