We can learn kindness from living and seeing hate and violence.
Father's eyes and anger
Is my Father's eyes and anger. Are they mine now?
I told you. I love you. I need you.
Love should bring calm and peace.
Violence. A hidden demon. Can strike without thought.
Sweet friend. Kind lover. Did you see the monster?
I tried to lock the demon up. He tried to escape.
I must walk away for a moment. Deep breathes and counting to ten.
My world is falling apart. Like my Father's world did. He took the bad road. Pissed off and violence.
I will keep quiet. Do my best to stay strong. Ain't easy when your world is falling down around you.
We need kind words. We need a lot of patience. A lot of love and forgiveness.
I will pray to the God of life and death Give me wisdom and strength.
Coyote 7 Feb 1989
My Father
When I look into the mirror. Do I see you my father?
Have I become what I despised all my life? Have my eyes. Your violence become mine?. Everyday I learn more loss. Loss of dreams. Lost of desires.
Will I become like you? Give up. Show spirit only when I'm violence or excited?
Can I stop my journey to man-hood? My eyes from hiding tears. Gentleness.
Have I travel too far? Is the blood too strong?
Am I destine to hurt everyone? I have loved.
If I chose my own road. Why do I follow my father sadness.
Coyote 27 April 1989
Sins of the fathers
My father fought in wars. Killed in battle that expanded to the real world.
He was a Mexican/Ojibwa man with no place to go. Hated for his color and race.
He demanded respect and never allow anyone to look down at him. His anger and violence controlled his mind and heart.
He told me. "You will get a education and make them respect you. I won't allow you to live my life."
My father watched me succeed. He told me often. "Don't allow my sins to become your sins. I have killed, done bad things. You must overcome the sins of your father."
Now I have lived a good life. "My father's sins made me go in the right direction. Sins of our father's need to teach us a better way."
He asks me once. "Remember son. You must pray for me. Children must pray for their parent to be allow to find peace."
I pray he is with his Soldier brother's in paradise. Drinking to a good day. I believe a kind God forgive the sins of men lost in the turmoil of hate and prejudice.
The sin of our father's must teach us the better road.
I've always had issues with my father but legally I cannot talk about that until my censorship ends in 2014. This really made me sit up and think about so many things.
Thank you ever so much for publishing this, very well written my friend :)
Your site is meaningful; I've read a lot of other blogs, but yours has persuaded me; I hope you'll have more fantastic blogs to share with people in the future. nerdle
Posted 2 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
2 Years Ago
Thank you and you are very kind. I appreciate the comment.
This touched home with me, not with my father but mother. There are times when I do things, then think its what my mother did- so I try my best to change. But sometimes we are destined to be like our parents, the only thing is we have a concious choice to be different. Maybe your father was angry about killing during the war, then when he was disrespected for his nationality or heritage his anger raged inside. Clearly he wanted something better for you, not that you demand respect but by being smart or intelligent would gain it. I found all three writings touching and heartfelt.
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Thank you Jen. You are right. My father told me. Go to school and allow no-one to look down at you.
1 Week Ago
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I've always had issues with my father but legally I cannot talk about that until my censorship ends in 2014. This really made me sit up and think about so many things.
Thank you ever so much for publishing this, very well written my friend :)
Superb! I loved the "Sins of the fathers". And the father is right on; in some beliefs and especially in Chinese culture; they talk about loosing "de" (virtue) and gaining "de". It means spending your ancestors virtue or gaining some for the next generations. So I like that part of the poem that mentioned this. As a half cast and when growing up, I know exactly what its like to be the "different colour skin", so again, another area of the poem that I could resonate with.
Three good poems here, and they are what i enjoy reading; life's journeys.
I agree on your poem, a father is one of the best figure to look out who you are, he taught us to be braver than him, it happens to me, my father is stubborn but he want me to deserved get the best appreciation from people around me.
"If I chose my own road why do I follow my fathers sadness" Your feelings for your father run deep as does the fear. It was beautifully captured, thank you for sharing.
You probably spoke for a lot of people here. At the risk of generalising too much, it seems as though girls also worry about becoming like their mothers. A friend of mine who became a counsellor said the best thing he ever learned was the question..What were your parents wounds. Somewhere in the answer is where we find ourselves, trying to live the lives they couldn't. Your poem touched my heart, thankyou.
A deep powerful and meaningful read. What we fear or dislike in others when we were young has now become part of us as we grow older. So true and sad at the same time. We can change things as they are in our hands. the sins of one generation need not be passed down or adopted by the next. well done for this great poem.
Good one man,
But I feel that your writing tend to lean on head and mouth more than heart!
I am saying this because I feel that there were a big place of heart in this work.
But you chose to treat the subject a little bit coldly.. right?
A Poet and writer who love to read and write.
My pleasure is reading about the bad and good in a life.
Also to honor the Poets/Writers of the past by reading their words.
Remember .. more..