The w***e bath

The w***e bath

A Poem by Coyote Poetry
"

Sometime we must think and make wise decisions.

"
The w***e bath
 
 Large shining teeth.
Telling me the way to heaven.
 
 I will find my way to paradise by the gift to his christian cause.
 His teeth seem to shine brighter.
 
His mumbling of a thousand words.
Leave me feeling dirty.
 
I get a damp cloth and wipe away the words of a greedy man.
 
 
 The captain tells me.
" I own you. "
 
"You do what I say.
Even  to death.
I'm in-charge."
 
 I try to wander away.
 But he keeps speaking.
 
I feel dirty and go to the latrine.
I get a damp cloth.
 
Another w***e bath in a life where the words are eating away at my soul.
 
 I sit in a classroom.
 The instructor asked me?
 
If I was ordered to kill.
Would I?
 
I tell him I would kill him first.
But my words become weaker with each second the instructor speaks.
 
 He shower me with his blood song and I began to understand.
 
The sweat pours down my face and I go to the bathroom.
 
One more w***e bath for a man drowning in useless words.
Forced to accept for a few pennies.
 
Beliefs only a mercenary could believe.
 
  Maybe if I was a high paid w***e.
 
 I could live with the things I must do.
 
 But nothing as bad as a cheap w***e.
 
                     Coyote
 
 


© 2011 Coyote Poetry


Author's Note

Coyote Poetry
Two Soldiers in Iraq were told no prisoners. They killed two Iraq men. Is this a excuse to kill or a man who did not use wisdom?

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Featured Review

Wow.
I'm amazed at the skill used in this poem. The different levels of interpretation in it are reminiscent of some of the greatest classic poets. I see traces of Eliot and Dickinson in these lines, and that alone is impressive.
All of these different "w***e baths" are all tied together in their questions of morality, and it leaves the whole concept of it so mirky.
This appears to lie in the fact that neither the preacher, the teacher or the captain truly can see the truth. An amazing piece that I am happy to have the opportunity to have read.

Posted 14 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.

Coyote Poetry

3 Years Ago

Thank you Dennis for reading and the comment. You honored me with your comment. No-one win in war.



Reviews

Odd isn't it? The line between being obediant and losing yourself as a human being. As we get older, the lines seem to blurr and shift along. We make mistakes and feel dirty. You are so good at showing a guilty conscience through your words.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

luv it :D

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Thats cool I must say it is a story of another life and time asw i see itWhether it was once yours or not it shares a poetic soul to all humanity
tate

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

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ZmH
very powerful piece.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Very thought provoking and intense. Very clear point and objective here. The word usage and scenes depicted here are very clear and concise, clearly parlaying the message you're trying to send. In terms of structure and flow, this worked beautifully, directing the reader's thoughts and emotions masterfully.
Minor line question: In the line that goes "The instructor ask me?" should that be a question mark at the end? Not really an issue or anything, but it might be a bit of a point of confusion to the reader.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

The concept is intriguing, and there is no shortage of interesting ideas and images here, but the whole effect is diluted by the occasional lack of subject/verb agreement and the looseness of the structure; I think some more tightly structured stanzas would help to highlight your thoughts and bring them into focus. With some sanding and varnishing, this could be a very special piece.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Wow! This was amazing. The twist you put at the end was very profound. Its interesting how you weave the whole "w***e" image into what you are trying to get across - the filth and sludge of the soul that one has to carry around. Very thought provoking in the context to which you wrote as well - the little note at the end definitely gave me some different perspective. I also like your style of writing. It very much so like a narrative in the sense that I feel like you are just speaking - more story telling perhaps? But I love it. Also the repetition of trying to cleanse yourself but its like the grim is to thick is very vivid; just the thought of not being able to fully shuffle off the jaded feeling makes me feel alittle clammy. Really love this poem.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

It is a very powerful, moving poem stained with the bruise and guilt of a true soldier's heart. The use of imagery is outstanding and brings forth vivid emotions of pain and torment to the soldier's soul. Amazing work!

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

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Bud
Oh, how the words leave a sting in my heart... Yes, I must agree with each one. What most do not understand, is that a soldier is one who has be broken down to believe that "the worst thing that can happen, is that he may die... and that's not so bad." Then built back up to be a killing machine, mercenary that basically donates his service for the cost of training. Primarily all this is to give the soldier the best odds of survival on the battle field. It's hell out there is a far, far, far understatement when it comes to seeing one of your kind in ways you never dreamed of seeing them scattered about. Those times, more than any is no time or place for panic to set in. And as I have been reminded, as I get too passionate sometimes writing ahead of myself, it also brings discipline and enables one to stand tall with confidence that they can succeed. But what is not told, likewise is that they cannot steel or strip the humanity out of a man... It is fundamentally instilled in most that killing one of your own is simply not suppose to be... and that cannot be washed off... They insult our servicemen, trying to convince them that their pay is fair. I beg to differ. They should be the ones getting the highest of the coffers offerings, not the symbolic elusive lie manufacturing heading office called the Pentagon. They're gone, alright. Into the basement every time they declare war...
Thank you, once more for sharing important words of wisdom that teach, inform, and mostly enlighten the reader one step closer to truth, my good friend.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on January 14, 2010
Last Updated on March 17, 2011

Author

Coyote Poetry
Coyote Poetry

MI



About
A Poet and writer who love to read and write. My pleasure is reading about the bad and good in a life. Also to honor the Poets/Writers of the past by reading their words. Remember .. more..

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