The Fray, the train ride to Monterey.. Part two.

Be not afraid of the Fray. The Fray take you to where you need to me. The wistful life will doom us to sadness.

The Tray.. the train ride to Monterey..
(Are dreams real? Maybe just the Fray?)

1- Martha jumped into the fray.
2- Sometimes the material on lawn furniture can fray, making it feel rough to the touch. 
3- Going out into the fray is one thing, but going unprepared is another.
4- On the eve of the fray Papineau sought safety in flight, followed by the leading spirits of the movement.
5- The answer is not to urge the most powerful ruling classes, with the most destructive weaponry, to join the fray.

( Will-o’-the-Wisp
The will-o’-the-wisp is a flame-like phosphorescence caused by gases from decaying plants in marshy areas. In olden days, it was personified as “Will with the wisp,” a sprite who carried a fleeting “wisp” of light. Foolish travelers were said to try to follow the light and were then led astray into the marsh.)
(Maybe a dream, a good dream.)

In the early morning  before Maria found me near Lake Huron. I met another. Seeking answers, seeking silence and crying alone... I went to the Port Austin break walk at 6 am. A two mile walk into Lake Huron. I walked her slow and easy, digesting the perfect beauty of the wild lake. I had my thermos of motel coffee and my favorite book "When God laughs" by Jack London. I walked to the end and I sat on some rocks. I saw a woman alone across from me, staring into the lake and I saw the sadness in her face. I left her alone. I knew when someone needed no voices. Leave them be and I was in a similar boat.

In was a chilly September morning and I brought a extra jacket and I noticed the woman wearing jeans and sweatshirt with Port Austin on it. Nothing else. Her long brown hair wild and free, The Lake Huron wind was kicking and she didn't care. I decided to go to her. I went to her slow and easy. I told her. Good morning, it is chilly this early morning. Usually, I am alone till 9 am. She turned to me, her brown eyes red from crying and she told me good morning. I handed her my extra jacket and I told her. Mighty chilly this morning, please take the jacket? She tried to smile and she took the jacket. She spoke lowly, thank you. I told her. I love the Lake Huron, help me gather my thoughts. Are you okay?

She turned away from me and she told me no. I told her. I was sorry and I will leave you be. She turned to me and she told me. Seven days ago, my daughter died from the coronavirus. I told her. I am so sorry and I didn't know people were still dying from the illness? She looked hard at me and she told me. Wasn't the coronavirus illness. Last Wednesday. She took the third coronavirus shot and she died four hours later. I don't know what to do and I am so damn angry. I asked her. Do you want company? Someone to talk to?

She looked me over. I was holding my book and the thermos of coffee. She told me. I don't want to share my sadness with you and she saw I had tears in my eyes. I told her. We need to release our sadness. I lost two brothers to suicide in the late eighties and you need to be angry. I am still angry. When we lose someone unexpectedly. It shock the mind, it shock the heart. You lost your daughter. We walked to the large rocks and I asked her. Why did you come to Port Austin? She gave a light smile and she told me. Diane loved this place. We have came here since she was two. Her birthday was yesterday. I came here to decide many things.

I held her right hand and I asked her. What will you do now? And my name is John. She reached out her right hand and she told me. My Name is Laura, like the old song. The Ricky Valance song. I told her. I loved the song and Ricky Valance died so young in  the plane crash. She looked at the Lake Huron, soft tears were falling from her eyes. She turned back to me and she asked me. What do I do? What is left for me? She was my baby girl. I am so damn angry and I don't want to live. I told her. You must be angry, you must scream to God, F**k off, you must scream to the Lake Huron. F**k-off. You must scream to the world, F**k off. I took her purse and I opened her purse. She looked surprised when I did this. In the left corner of the small purse, a loaded 32 pistol. I took the pistol out and I asked her.  Laura, what is the loaded gun for?

She turned to the Lake Huron and she told me. I wanted to die at 7 am. I decided death would be easier than living without my daughter. You showed-up and I was waiting for you to leave. I touched her shoulder. The wisp of death isn't sweet. The wisp of death is final and do you believe your daughter would want you to die alone? She told me no. and she whispered. She had a heart of gold and so kind. She talks like you. In circles and I miss the circles now. I wrote my name to a sheet of paper and my phone number. I asked her and she wrote down her phone number and address. I told her, we are almost neighbors. You live in Romeo and I live in Clinton Twp. I asked her. Do you have grandchildren? She told me no. I have a grandmother who lived alone and strong. I am not needed anywhere.

I told her. I am easy to find. Put my name into the google and you can find me. Please call me, anytime. Night or day. She turned away from me and she asked me. Why are you bothering with me? I told her. The Fray of life brought us together. I decided I was tired and I wanted to escape. I came today to Port Austin and I found you. She laughed at my words and she told me. You sound like my daughter. She loved books and conversation. I read books, she loved, to be able to talk with her.

The Fray. Please John, tell me about the Fray.

I took her right hand and I held it softly.  I told her. Most people love to be wistful, never seeking what they really want. Run in circles like mice in a cage. They die alone and regretful. I am wistful myself today and I am seeking the Fray. Hard to find the Fray when you forget where the Fray is? She looked into  my eyes deeply and she told me. My daughter, last words to me. Travel, raise some hell and I love you mama. She would want me to find the Fray. I told her. Maybe our chance meeting was for a reason and I asked her. Can I hold-on to the 32 pistol?

She told me. Keep the gun and I need a friend. I don't have many no-more. I lived for work and success. Now I have nothing left except tears and anger. I told her. Me and you will tell Lake Huron, God and the world to f**k-off today. We walked to the end of the pier she shouted to the Lake Huron, F**k-off. She shouted to God, f**k off and she shouted to the world, f**k off. And she whisper to Lake Huron. I love you Diane, my baby girl. How can I live without you. I told her, we must be angry, we must mourn and we must cry a million tears.

She fell into my arms and I held her like a child. I whispered to her. I have your phone number and you have my phone number. You and me, we will find the Fray. Please let's find the places of chaos where we can live for people, who cannot. We walked slowly into the city of Port Austin. I walked her to her motel room and I kissed her face and her hair. I told her. Please call me, if you need anything. She told me. I will go home to my grandmother and I know she needs me too. Thank you John. I do believe, we came together today because. You had to save me. My daughter would had adored you. You and your Fray. Please call me, when you know where the Fray is? I left her and I prayed to the Goddess of Lake Huron. Please help Laura.

After Maria left me later in the night. After I decided to go to Monterey on the train. I walked to my motel room. I decided to call Laura. She gave me a gentle hello. I told her. A good friend came to me tonight and I know where the Fray is now. It won't be wistful journey. Tomorrow I will take the train to Monterey. I will take what I need and if you want. We can seek the Fray. It is Monterey and Big Sur. She laughed at my words and she asked me. How long will we be gone? I told her. I have no place to be, no-one needs me here and the Fray is whispering our names. She told me. I am the same and what time do we meet at the train station in Detroit? I told her 10 am, the five day trip can begin. She laughed and she cried. I will be there John. Please don't disappoint me.

I arrived early at the train station and I took my one piece of luggage into the train. I saw in the distance inside the train. Laura carrying two bags of luggage. I was surprised, she showed-up. Maybe I saved her? Maybe we needed each other? I called her name and she ran to me and she hugged me. With tears in her eyes, she told me. I didn't believe, you would come. I decided if necessary. I would seek the Fray alone. I didn't want to be alone. We found our seats and she held my right hand tightly and she told me. My grandmother told me. Please honey, leave the sadness. Diane would want you to be alive. One day, you can tell her about the famous Fray. About the great journey.

She rested against me and I held like a child. The train started to move and she smiled. She asked me. Am I running away or escaping to something? I told her. We are seeking the Fray. In the Fray, life is chaos and adventure. We don't accept less, we accept more. I caressed her forehead gentle and she closed her eyes. I knew. She didn't sleep for seven days. I prayed to the morning. Please take to us to a place where we can gather our minds, please help dear Laura.

Dancing Coyote

Author's Note

Thank you for reading.

Reviews

[Betty Hermelee]

A beautiful story John.... loss is so heavy to bear for anyone and sometimes one needs to be alone and sometimes it's better to be in the fray....you taught her how to mourn the loss of her daughter...to be angry at the world, get those feelings out and then you will find peace wherever you seek it, be it in the fray or elsewhere.....a new journey begins.....
Warmly, B

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you dear Betty. We need to escape organized life. All of us need the Fray.

[Betty Hermelee]

You're very welcome John!
Warmly, B

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

Wow I’m speechless
I loved this
Your best yet John !!

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you dear Julie. I appreciate the kind words.

[Soren]

Coyote this story captures the heart, It strikes deep at what it is to be human. The lead in with the definitions was brilliant especially the part about willow the wisp and the light that leads one into the marsh. This had such a great tie in. The story brought tears to my eyes being so well written it felt like I was there.

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you Soren for reading and the comment. We need kindness and gentle words. I appreciate the comment.

[W. Barrett Munn]

You are really in your wheelhouse with these poignant stories of redemption. Thanks for telling the story.

Winston

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you Winston. Hard to mourn alone.

[Stella Armour]

" She asked me. Am I running away or escaping to something?"
This is something that at times i have asked myself John . My first husband said i was running away to belittle me , but the truth was i was leaving something not worth having and taking a leap into the unknown.
Love this part 2 of the story :)

[Coyote Poetry]

Sometime dear Stella. We must escape. The Fray is a needed place. Thank you for reading and the comment.