Can't be saved.

just words.

                                 Can't be saved

I stood by the Lake Huron lake and I told her. I'm the last man standing.

My children and grandchildren need me. My children need a strong father and the little one's need
a joyous grandfather. Beautiful daughters need a father going forward, not backward.

I told the Clinton river. I'm so damn tire. I put my hands into the flowing water. Allow the chill and the coldness to awake my mind.

I quit moving lately. Questioning life and death? I told the wind and the trees. Suicide is easy. Being alive is hard. My brothers got scared at twenty years old. Kicked away a chair and left this world. Death is a dead-end. There is no-more debt or regret.

I'm standing in the Upper Michigan forest. I caressed the ancient trees. My favorite tree is the witches tree. I like how she reaches out in so many directions. People fear them. I like them because they reach to God and to the earth. They spread their branches like a welcoming embrace that can hold you forever. I wish to be a witches tree. Be able to reach out to so many things, not to be grounded, to reach for the sky only.

I haven't felt good in a long time. Been locked-in to a dead-end job and the walls are caving in. The Coyote spirit is fading.

I wonder can the Coyote sing and dance again? Can the Coyote be the joker and find the place of laughter?

Maybe the Coyote is no-more.

I asked the river, lake and the ancient trees.  Am I a worthwhile part of life?

The kind wind whispered to me. You are not so important. You must leave good earth behind one day. You must be the gardener of the future now. You must water with knowledge your children and grandchildren. Give them strength and wisdom.

The joker must come alive. Laugh, sing and dance till the end. Trick the people who enslaved you. Write and speak of peace and love. Leave something worthwhile behind. Death will come soon enough. Better to be surrounded by children, laughter and hold the old dreams tightly.

Suicide is easy and life is harder.

                       John Castellenas/Coyote

Author's Note

A new poem. I hope you like.

Reviews

[Valentine]

John, I love how your writing often gives reference to the beliefs of your fore fathers, the American Indian. I have often thought in history classes we all should have studied them as well as all of the other people we did study. They are what made America in the first place. As for this poem, we all want to keep you around and are happy to call you a special friend. Valentine

[Coyote Poetry]

I will be around for awhile. Grandchildren need their Grandpa. Thank you for reading and the comment. I appreciate my dear friend.

[June Fowler]

Hi hang on !! Tones of warm love and regards for u and the family We all need u dear, specially me! Thanks for being a worthy friend.

[Coyote Poetry]

I'm okay. Just bad and good days. Thank you for the concern. I have three grand-boys who need the free babysitter.

[June Fowler]

lol just for your ears, you can buy my book Yellow from the net for your grand kids and also kindly tell your friends and others in the family about it too. Lots of love and regards.

[Zoe Naga]

Another awesome piece. I love your writing.. ^-^♥

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you Zoe. I appreciate the comment.

[emmajoy]

When a man who's fought for his country, travelled the world, loved and lost, gone through storms and more and yet.. YET can write in the way you do... your future life is filled to the brim with dedication to all things beautiful. Of course there's going to be chill and heat, dark nights and too bright days - there's always something.. but.. your words have always touched so many people in one way or another. Stay strong for us.. and most of all, even though you trip - like most of us, be strong for yourself.

God bless.

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you emmajoy. Just words written. Good to release frustration to paper.

[emmajoy]

Well, i have to take things to heart, seriously, sometimes. Seems very real. :)

[Coyote Poetry]

Had a positive ending. Grandchildren need their Grandpa alive and strong.

[Beautiful Christmas Tre..]

I asked the river, lake and the ancient trees. Am I a worthwhile part of life?

The kind wind whispered to me.

I love this poem because it reminds me of my own.

[Coyote Poetry]

Poetry and nature. Always take us to good places. Thank you for reading and the comment.

[June Fowler]

John in this poem u seemed so tired on life, as though u need a change, so low in spirit so disheartened, never worry dear friend, life can be troublesome, hurtfull and demanding, With the Lord all things r possible. Lay ur hand in the hand of the Man From Galalie, trusting Him completely. Ur in my prayers . I love ur honesty, "I havnt felt..................................Maybe the Coyote is no more!" well ur very much here, and ur family needs u , If I may say so ...ur friends need u too..... Ur one of your kind and there is no other John Castellenas, so chin up and step into another day with confidence, Ur special and there is only one U so thank the Lord for it! Much love and warm regards. June

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you June. Old soldiers never die. Just hanging around trying to find some laughter and new journey.

[Lyingwithlions]

Very thought provoking read! I enjoyed this very much.

"You must be the gardener of the future now." -- Love that!!

[Coyote Poetry]

I try with three grandchildren. Thank you for reading and the comment.

[ReasoningwithWords]

Coyote great poem!! Why Lake Huron?

[Coyote Poetry]

I was near Lake Huron last year. I live in Michigan and the lakes are near me. Lake Huron is beautiful. No big cities near and a outstanding view to be seen.

[Ken Simm.]

I can hear the voice saying this John. I can smell the winds that he is saying it to and I understand what he is saying and why. What I could never do is express it so well.

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you Ken for reading and the comment. I do appreciate.

[Sari Segale]

I so can relate to this poem, being a grandmother myself and having a beautiful family,close to my heart:
the anscestors voice, so much easy to live around children family; yes you can sing and dance again, dance
with me ,the "abuelos" dance, stay close to the heart,family; thanks so much for sharing this beautiful, powerful, amazing poetry.

[Coyote Poetry]

I agree Sari. Us grandparent have great responsibility. Thank you for reading and the comment. I do appreciate.

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Oh.. the words washed over me..
Left me pondering for a very long time..
How Life and oblivion and everything in between, can wear you out..
But one should always be full of spirits, because this life.. the very existence is a gift..
Thought provoking piece..!
Relished it..!

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you. Certain time of year. My brothers come to my mind.

[Jane Taylor Hardy]

Softly ethereal I thoroughly enjoyed this hallowed write.

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you Jane. Sometime we can think too much.