Do You Know

Do you know how hard it was
to care for you as I did
I was just a little girl
but you were my mum and dad

You were supposed to parent me
but instead I parented you
What other choice did I have
there was nothing else I could do

You neglected me at every turn
left me terrified in my room
Chased me into the darkest night
when you were in a mood

You tormented my soul
in your drunken rage
Crushed my childish spirit
in the war you waged

Yet still I loved and cared for you
try to save you from yourself
Stood up to your demons
until I was battered with your belt

I did all I could to help you
yet you were hell bent to destroy
To rip my fragile soul to bits
with the weapons you deployed

In the end your anger killed you
turned in upon itself
Leaving me alone with memories
of a childhood spent in hell

Reviews

[jacob erin-cilberto]

this is not the way it is supposed to be growing up...

i am caring for my parents now...but they are 93 and 91....and they took care of me when they were supposed to.

this is sad to read...but the bottle does that to people...and they do it to other people,
including family...the kids seem to always suffer most.

[Carolann Dowsett]

Thank you so much Jacob.

[emmajoy]

' Yet still I loved and cared for you ~ try to save you from yourself ~ Stood up to your demons ~ until I was battered with your belt '

Have read this poem three times and each time cringed at the pain running through it, start to finish. To put together such agonising memories then lay them into the public domain shows amazing courage. God knows how you've survived I don't know but you have. Be pround of self, be proud of words that show the world that you've neither lost your spirit or humanity. (You)

[Carolann Dowsett]

Thanks so much Emma Joy your review means a lot to me.

[gabrielle]

This is a heartbreaking piece Carolann.
It's the duty of the parents to take care of their children and not the child taking care of the parent. And you have vividly pictured a very tragic scenario of the reversal of roles. Sad yet very well-penned.

[Carolann Dowsett]

Thanks so much Gabrielle

[Coyote Poetry]

A very sad poem. Parent can teach us many things. I saw anger and violence. I tried my best to be different. Poor kids must live with abuse and anger. If we are lucky. It teaches us to be better. I did like you tried to be kind. Thank you for sharing the excellent poem.
Coyote

[Carolann Dowsett]

Thank you so much.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Nothing worse then a child being robbed of their innocence and youth. I can feel the anger in your words that is expected in that situation, but I also sense the compassion that shows what a big heart you have.

[Carolann Dowsett]

Thank you so much.

[The Rock And Roll Cowboy(REBEL WITH A CAUSE)]

Welcome :)

[Samuel Dickens]

An excellent, revealing and heart-wrenching poem. This is why I always applaud those who had good, caring and loving parents. We have to pass a test to drive a car, but for the most important job in the world--parenting, there's nothing whatsoever.

[Carolann Dowsett]

Yes that's very true thanks so much Samuel.

[TheMadnessWithin]

wow this is an amazing poem, it really shows what your feeling, i can really relate, your childhood memories stay with with you for the rest of your life, i admire that you never turned to hatred like i have

[Carolann Dowsett]

Thanks so much. I hope you find a way to a place of peace. x

[Trigorin]

Not bad. There's obviously a great deal of emotion behind this piece and you convey it very well, in spite of some rather cliche choice of imagery. I'd suggest looking this over and thinking about whether or not there were more succinct and perhaps more elegant ways of expressing the same emotions you show here, but that's up to you. Well done.

[Carolann Dowsett]

You should be careful that that heartless attitude of yours doesn't turn around and bite you on the arse one day. Just saying....

[emmajoy]

I so agree with your reaction, Carolann. I couldn't even leave a review when I read this one, was so horrified and upset by the arrogant lack of empathy.