NOT "Off With His Head"

My alternate short story, to an original story written by Anne, an old school friend

My old school friend Anne belongs to a writers group. They often use Shakespeare’s quotations and write short stories around these quotes.

This particular Shakespeare's quote for her story was “Off With His Head”

Her story was about a man named Sam, annoyed with his chicken coup’s rooster vocalizing at dawn and disturbing his sleep. Her story describes Sam’s solution and his engagement of chasing & catching the old rooster for decapitation. Then present it to his wife Hazel to cook for dinner, which she flatly refused, for reasons that the meat would be too tough.

Anne's & my alternate stories on FB https://www.facebook.com/anne.mayne.524/posts/10158462245719149

~ ~ * ~ ~ * ~ ~ * ~ ~

 ... My Alternative Story : NOT Off With His Head ...

How very sad 😭 for this rooster, who enjoyed welcoming in the new day with an array of vocal poultry talk, squawking being his only language skill.

Sam, the rooster’s ’guardian’, a typical bloke with no lateral thinking abilities, considered solving the daybreak rooster cacophony, only with thoughts of murder on his mind.  

Never once did an alternate non-murder solution occur to Sam with his dwarf sized brain, who has not even the tiniest of animal linguistic, nor animal behaviour savvy to his name.

A more compassionate alternative comes to my mind….Why Not??  -->>>  try placing Mr Rooster into darkened accommodation where the rooster’s natural light-oriented time clock might be defeated!

‘Cos for many humans, irritating daybreak rooster-speak announcements would be a bit more acceptable maybe an hour or two later.

Sam could then arise from his slumber at his usual time, open up Mr Rooster’s darkened, soundproof den and allow him to stroll out to engage in his normal morning vocal ritual, shake his feathers and join his hen harem for breakfast.

Hazel will now not need to waste her time, summoning up all her culinary and spice skills, endeavouring to convert a chewy and leathery headless old rooster into a reasonably palatable dinner dish.

A Could Be Happy Ending with Smiles all round 🙂 😀

... simple-minded Sam is not cranky;

... Hazel has time to do more useful and interesting things she enjoys; and

... our Mr Rooster, the subject of this short story, is still alive, surrounded by his feathered clan and playmates, to enjoy his everyday poultry activities and hierarchical chicken politics.  Woo-hoo!

 by Carola Hume /January 2022 (edited March ''22)

.

Author's Note

I'm a fish-eating vegetarian, so I felt spurred on to write my own version of Anne's story with a less deadly and alternative ending.

Reviews

[Chris Shaw]

Oh Carola, I loved this read. Simple Sam with a peanut brain certainly wasn't a thinker. Poor Mr Rooster had such an unnecessary ending. Just a bit of thought required for an alternative solution. So applicable to our world today. More lateral thinking required. You rock Carola :)

Chris

[Carola]

hi chris, glad you liked my version of Anne's story.
yes, lateral thinking is sadly lacking in many people, particularly politicians & bureaucrats.
I do enjoy writing venting emails to them & knocking them between the eyes.
happy easter
cheerio carola

[Samuel Dickens]

I'm not that Sam... I swear I'm not, though when young, I did off an old, mean, rooster that ended up in a Sunday boiling pot. This Mr. Rooster was a very lucky fellow, I'd say. Sam, though not the brightest, had compassion enough to save the vocally-excessive bird. (A dark, sound-proof enclosure--that's clever) Not being on FB, I couldn't read your friend's less humane version.

[Carola]

hi sam, thanks for stopping by to read & review. haven't been on WC in over a year, hadn't done any writing & been busy with other things.
cheerio carola

[Patricia]

oh my dear carola, you write prose beautifully, I really enjoyed this and hey, bonus points for using cacophony, one of my favorite words. I do owe you several returned favors and I always return them but often take breaks from the computer because of my vision but I will return to you - to give back the love to my new friend. Hugs! Write On!

[Carola]

thanks patricia. understood about your vision.
i tend to be here on WC for a couple of weeks or so & then often disappear for a while. I've only just returned after about a year.

cheerio carola

ps I really think your poem 'fragments of free' ...such a great write, that you ought to send it to your local newspapers 'letters to the editor' section.

[Patricia]

Oh wow, really! Yes William thinks I should send it to Putin. LOL