Haunting Stillness

Not sure what to call this - poetry? short story? Basically my thoughts on this foggy still morning. What would you call it? I had 2 photos for this but I'm posting the first one.

The sun is slowly rising, casting its indirect light behind the clouds on this chilly morning.  Fog is caressing the fields, wrapping its arms and blankets around the trees, and you can hear the echoes of nothingness.  So still, you can hear the trees whispering.  Ghosts wander here.  I look for them, searching for movement in the fog to make their presence known.  A shadow perhaps.  A flowing of their gown in the mist.  Perfectly enchanted and inspired, letting my mind meander and drift and float through this haunted vision, I begin my walk beside these ghosts.  With each step, breaking the silence.  I do not get far.  Sitting beneath the strong fatherly branches, I breathe in the fresh cool stillness.

Author's Note

Please see description for my notes.

Reviews

[Roger Turgeon]

I would use another word for one of the early "hear" uses. Hearing the echoes and then hearing the trees. I did feel the stillness in this poem and it brought that stillness to life for me. ( : O )

[Maxwell McArdle]

A bit contradicting in detail at times, but the personification presented was magnificent and well thought out.

[Carol Blake]

Where do you see contradiction? Thanks.

[Maxwell McArdle]

Carol,

I must apologize. Perhaps "contradiction" was not the correct word for me to describe my questions on your work. Rather, metaphors that seemed paradoxical. For example, an echo of nothingness; however, do not mistake this as a poor comment, I was intrigued most graciously by your work.

[Carol Blake]

Oh, I didn't see it as a poor comment. :) I was just confused where the contradictions were. Thank you for your kind review.

[Alfred Kukitz]

Carol you rendered this scene beautifully. The enchantment of your words and the development of the piece, I thought, wanted to go on and create a more moving story. I didn't want it to end. Welcome to the Cafe!

[Carol Blake]

Oh bless you! What uplifting and kind words you give. I have been thinking I want to add more to it. Thank you for making me smile today! Thank you for your warm and inviting welcome. :)

[Alfred Kukitz]

I sent it to Jacob, the writer with a white beard, he liked it thought it was short prose.

[Carol Blake]

I guess I haven't met Jacob yet. I'll have to go check out his stuff, too. That was sweet of you. Thanks!

[KAREN]

Whatever it is I enjoyed reading it. It was haunting, but had a peaceful feel to it, too. Your imagery is awesome!

[Carol Blake]

Thank you, storiestotell. You made me smile. I'm so happy you enjoyed it. I love haunting. Fog haunts me but it engages my spirit, as well, if that makes sense.

[KAREN]

My pleasure!

[Roland]

I agree with the other comments, that this is lovely. It almost seems to be a "page 1", the lead into a story. Perhaps you have (can) established a new category called "Thoughts". Like Twitter but under 200 words. Nice.

[Carol Blake]

Thank you, Roland! I may have to roll with this one and use it as a lead in as you suggested. This sounds fun. Ah, thoughts. Good one! I like it. ;)

[HungryGhost]

This is absolutely lovely.

[Carol Blake]

Thank you so much, HungryGhost! :)

[Samuel Dickens]

I can't tell you what to call it, but it doesn't really need a name, in my opinion. A rose by any other name--right? Bottom line is, it's lovely.

[Carol Blake]

Aw, thanks Sam! May I call you Sam? Or do you prefer Samuel? Thank you for the smile!! ;)

[Samuel Dickens]

Sam I am, Carol.