Chapter 1

This is a fictional story only because if you googled names and events you wouldn’t get a newspaper article. The story I've created is my version of reality. The characters, each and every one of them, are a blend between parts of both myself and everyone I've met. Chances are, if you ever meant anything at all to me, you’re in this story under a different name.

If you were to search the name I wrote this under you wouldn’t get anything either. Because unless I tell you it was me, nobody’s ever going to know. I could be anyone. A little anonymity and suddenly you’re spilling your deepest, darkest secrets.

But this is only a true story because of that one kid in my high school, a grade above me, who killed himself. Up until then, he was just some kid to most people. I was told he was bullied and that’s why he did. I doubt that was his only reason, but I‘ll believe it, for now.

The thing with my school was that bullying wasn't ‘cool’ like you see in bad teen dramas. There was no name-calling and fistfights in the hallway or behind the school, no pushing the scrawny freshman kid into a locker. I compare it to the mafia in the sense that we all knew what was going on, but unless you were involved, you didn't know the who, what, when, or where. I don’t think anyone at all knew the why.

But please, whatever you do; whether you read the whole thing or stop right here, whether this changes anything for you or not, please don’t try to figure out who I am. I know if anyone I knew were to figure it out, they’d never look at me the same. They’d act like I’d changed, when really; this was who I was all along.

The reason I set out writing this in the first place was because I understood why that kid did it, and that scared me. I knew if anything ever happened to me I wanted a note, too. So this story? It’s my note. I’m leaving this piece of me behind in memorial for both of us. Even though most everyone’s forgotten that kid by now, I haven’t. Hell, I’m writing a book for him even though we never spoke a word. So here’s to you, kid. Let’s never be forgotten again.