Three Types Of Attitudes When Approaching People

The best way to make friends while travelling

Having spent my last four days partying in Manila I have met some really cool travelers. And made some memories that will last a lifetime. Though back at the States I seldom drink, actually I was sober for about four months when I was working on myself. But now since being on traveling mode I have been drinking quite a lot. No matter where I go I can make friends pretty easily. And no I am not being cocky or arrogant about this. I always approach people with these three types of attitudes. (might be the wrong title) Lets look more of it as a guideline when you cold approach other travelers.

Having anxiety to approach someone can be really daunting, but in reality most people who travel want to meet other people (matter of fact at this moment a couple of Filipino high school teachers just invited me to drink coffee with them at there table, so I am going to accept there offer and go sit and have a chat with them be right back) Well that delayed me for a while but it turns out they saw me when I volunteered for the Wrestling coach position in Rosales National High school. They had a laugh with me because I am the first person to apply for a volunteer position there. 

SO since a opportunity just happened to me right there I'll explain the first thing that happened. They were the ones who extended out there invitation to sit at there table for coffee, I happily obliged. Wither you are approaching or being approached the first thing you should always do is SMILE. Smiling is a form of openness it shows that you are being open for communication. Obviously some people smile only to be polite, but I digress the best thing to do when first approaching a person or persons is smile. Say: "Hey do you guys have room for one more?" or "hey guys my name is Andrew". To this day I have never been denied to enter a group of people. The next thing after the smile should always be physical touch. Now don't go grabbing b**b or doing anything weird, no just simply extend for a handshake or if you can read the atmosphere a nice short hug. 

But if you are just starting just go with the handshake. A simple handshake can release some tension from a interaction. I can't really explain it myself, but I have noticed people start to get less awkward about the cold approach and tend to be more at ease with the situation. I have also tested out this theory by not shaking someones hand, the other person tends to not feel acknowledged by you. Therefore making the whole interaction really weird. I am sure there is a smarter and more eloquent writer that can explain why this is the case. But yeah always smile and always right after initiate the handshake.

Have you ever encountered a grumpy person or a moody person at a bar. No one wants to sit next to these types of people. In fact no one wants to hang out with a person who spills out all there problems and insecurities. MOST people are attracted to the joyous person. The person who isn't faking it. So when you meet someone be extremely happy and joyous, because hey that person might be your next best friend or your next partner... Or you know hook up if you are into that type of travel. But again being joyous is a attractive personality, most people will want to get to know you. For example when I checked in I instantly greeted the staff as friendly as I could, and at the end they ended up helping me a whole bunch with my stay. I met my bunk mates and instantly greeted them and stated my intentions of just having a bender in Manila. We all had a big laugh and then I left to the hangout spot and instantly scouted to talk to someone. At the end of the day I know I formed the group that would create awesome drinking stories for years to come. (I know that sounds conceited but I have the whole group that can back up my claim) Be genuinely joyful and happy when first meeting someone always. The brooding sad person will only attract.... Well just that.

Lastly listen. Everyone has a story they want to share, and when you meet other backpackers they have PLENTY of crazy events that happened to them. So listen intently don't act like you care, really try to get a laugh out of it, or maybe even learn something. I have learned so much by just listening to other peoples perspectives and even a lot of travel advice. Try not to talk yourself up or try to please people to make them like you. It wont work people will see right through it. You are a individual act like one. I will always be respectful and try not to offend anybody, but that being said I did end up offending someone "a feminist" she got mad at my new tattoo design calling it basically sexist. Instead of conceiving or even getting angry, I stayed in my centered, did not argue at all. All I did was jokingly gave her little joking counter arguments that made everyone else laugh making her realize her being offended would not rile me up. So at the end she ended up ceasing the entire argument and then tried to retract her argument to make her sound less angry. (She ended up being a pretty cool girl). 

This is a bit rushed and there are probably a lot of grammar errors or things that don't make any sense but as I am traveling and I am writing in coffee shops or on buses I sort of try to rush things. Once everything settles down a bit I will try to write way better then I am now. I do apologize.

-Andrew Paul Caasi