Redamancy #7

Suddenly there we were,
Staring into the glass-
Or at least I was.
I looked and I saw
Eyes greedily eating up every sight
I tried to take a picture in my mind
Tried to burn each entity into my memory.
And I felt you fall in love
with me falling in love with
my passion.
We grew closer than ever,
our spirits entwined just as we were
under that October sky.
You and I gazed up into heaven
and saw God... Not for the first time.
I felt so small.
Trillions of galaxies watching and there we were with
a hammock in the yard.
I'm already shivering as this weather gets colder,
but you never will.
Thank God for blankets and
our tiny hallelujah.

Reviews

[Elie Marie]

our spirits entwined just as we were
what a great way of describing falling in love.

[Camryn Jeter]

Thanks! Usually I do try to use different phrases and metaphors than the typical ones just to mix it up

[Christine]

Thank God for blankets and our tiny hallelujah. Great poem, great line. Glimpse a bit of Leonard Cohen in there.

[Camryn Jeter]

Thank you. That's probably one of the better lines I've written