Not A Sonnet # 02

this was written on jan.13 this year.not much of a poem but fun to read

One year, one month, one day short of a week.

One tear, I bleed, I sought to keep.

Your clear, green, green soul sits.

So near, my sin, I thought, we kissed.

 

One year, one month, one day short of a week.

You seek, your sword, you mourn and sneer.

Your love, a lie, the cord: you severed.

One tear, I bleed, I sought to keep.

 

One year, one month, one day short of a week.

Sick of your green, green soul that sits.

Mere me, a trash you threw for someone new.

The pain, the wound, your words spit on you.

 

One year, one month, one day short of a week.

You’re weak; you’re short. One day, this month, that year is through.

 

Reviews

[Calliope]

wee..thank you, K...i was experimenting on commas and sounds then..haha...im glad you liked it..*hugs

[K Antonacci]

I love the use of commas and rhythm in this piece.
And i like the repetition of the first line is all of the stanzas :)

This is my favorite :
"Your love, a lie, the cord: you severed.
One tear, I bleed, I sought to keep."

Very nice job :)
Love,
K