Chapter Twenty Five

 One night as I sat in my armchair reading while I waited for Jay, I heard a sound that made me feel sick.  It was the sound of a poorly-maintained Cerberati pulling into my driveway, the engine gunning before it silenced.  God, please no!  Panicking, I let Mariah out back.

 Earl burst in, his pupils the size of dimes.  “Baby!  I’m so glad you’re here!”  His breath reeked of alcohol, no surprises there.

 “Damn it, Earl!  How many times do I need to tell you I have a sleeping daughter upstairs!”  True as that was, I knew my anger was due at least in part to the fact that my plans for the evening were now changed.  The moment Jay came to mind again I was horrified to realize, I had never told him about Earl!

 He quieted at least, but something about his manner was unsettling.  “Oh, I know, that’s why I’m here,” he said in a voice that was almost...  Pleading.  “See, I was at the club and I had a...  A vision, that’s what it was!  I saw you, and me, and the baby, and we were all a happy family!  I’m here to make things right, I swear I am!”

 The baby?  You mean my five year old?  “Earl, what are you on right now?”

 He smiled, and I drew my bathrobe tighter.  “Just high on love...  C’mon, you’re my baby-mamma!  You know you can’t say no to me.”

 The hell I can’t!  “Earl, would you just go, please?”

 “C’mon, why you gotta be this way?  Tonight of all nights!”

 “What’s ‘tonight’, Earl?” I asked with thinning patience.

 “C’mon,” he repeated, and headed for my bedroom.

 “Earl!” I hissed, following him.  “Will you please get out?”  In my bedroom, he started undressing.  “Earl, no!”

 His naked body slid into my bed, and I was more repulsed by it than I had ever been.  “I’m waiting,” he said with an attempt at a seductive smile that could have been sad if it weren’t so infuriating.  I thought of hitting him, but a quick look inward showed I was still afraid of him, even considering the eerily amiable mood his drugs had put him in.

 “I’m waiting, Earl.  I don’t want you here.”

 He smiled, amused at who knows what.  “B***h, I own your a*s,” he mumbled before passing out.  Laying down must have done something to his blood flow.

 I panicked.  I knew he was too heavy to drag out of my bed.  Even if I could, then what?  Him being splayed naked on my floor was no improvement.  “Earl?  Earl!”  He started snoring.  “Damn you...”

 I thought of waiting for Jay in his room, but didn’t dare leave Earl alone in mine.  Even though my passwords were no longer stored on my computer, I just didn’t trust him enough for anything.

 I laid next to him over the covers, anxiously waiting for Jay.  I tried to imagine what I could say to him, and had to settle for hoping something would come to me when the time came.

 The time did pass, but it never came.  Eleven thirty came, then midnight...  The last time I remembered looking at the clock was just after one, and I fell asleep myself.

----

 I woke the next morning to find Earl in the same spot, unfortunately still breathing.  I carefully rolled out of bed so as not to disturb the mattress and dressed, noticing my door was closed.  I was sure I’d left it slightly ajar to listen for Jay.  I gingerly tried to open his door, and found it locked.  I knew I could open it with a small screwdriver, but didn’t want to disrespect him.  No more than you already have, anyway.  You were warned about this, and paid no attention.  Why?  Aren’t his feelings worth one awkward conversation?

 Wracked with guilt, I called Price Slashers.  “Patty?  How bad do you need me today?”

 “Uh-oh.  What’s wrong?”

 I sighed and fought back my tears.  “I have a drunk idiot passed out in my house, and a lot of explaining to do to Jay.”

 Patty grunted, and I could tell she was annoyed, but not entirely unsympathetic.  “Take the day, then.  I’ll figure something out.”

 “Thanks, Patty,” I said hollowly, and hung up.

 I got Maddie up, dressed, fed, and out the door, relieved that she didn’t ask about the extra car in the driveway.  I made coffee and sat at the kitchen table, awaiting the inevitable...

 Earl was the first up.  I heard him dress and go to the bathroom, then he came in and joined me at the table.  I had no idea what to say.  His pupils were back to normal, and so were his eyes as they glared angrily.  “So, since when are you using a man’s razor and aftershave?  Birth control f****n’ with your hormones already?”

 “They’re not mine, Earl,” I sighed.

 “I know that, you stupid b***h!  Whose are they?”

 “Shh!  They’re...”

 “Don’t f****n’ ‘shoosh’ me!”

 “Do you remember me saying anything about being broke ever, Earl?  I had to rent a room.  They’re my tenant’s.”

 “Tenant,” he repeated mockingly.  “Yeah, right.”  A wicked grin stole onto his face.  “So.  Ya f****n’ him?”

 I was ashamed to feel my face redden.  “Why do you ask, Earl?  Does that matter to you?”

 I heard Jay’s feet hit the floor, and knew it was intentional.  Usually he walked so lightly he  was always startling me.  “Uh-oh, he’s up.”  Earl laughed.  “Nah, I don’t care if you’re f****n’ him.  Guy wants my leftovers, that’s fine with me.”

 I had almost forgotten what it was like, to be discussed like a piece of meat.  It stung but at least, I realized, I wasn’t used to it anymore.  Jay’s door opened and Mariah came out.  I realized I had never let her in.  “What was going on with you last night, anyway?” I asked.  “I thought you had this great vision and...”

 He cut me off.  “God damn you’re stupid.  Ain’t you ever seen someone rollin’ before?”  Jay came into the kitchen at that moment.  “’Sup, man?” Earl asked with a quickly assumed smile, trying to pretend he hadn’t just been acting like a complete a*****e a second ago.

 “Coffee?” I asked weakly.  At least Earl didn’t jump up and start swinging...

 “Sure,” Jay said, ignoring Earl.

 “Hey, I asked you what’s up.  I’m Earl.”

 “Waking up,” Jay said.  As civil as they were managing to act, it was like I could taste and smell the rivalry between them.

 “This is Jay,” I said, handing him a mug.

 “Jay, right.  Laura was just telling me what a great dick you have,” Earl said, testing him.

 “Earl!” I snapped, but was of course ignored.

 Jay looked him in the eye, and Earl held his gaze with a crooked smile.  He looked to me, and I shrugged helplessly for lack of words.  He sighed.  “Well.  This is stupid.”  He got up and tossed his mug into the sink, making it clatter loudly.  “Seeya.”

 “Aw, Jay, be a sport.  I was just foolin’ around, c’mon back!”

 Jay left with Mariah.  I knew he wasn’t going to work at this hour.  Where, then?

 We listened to his car pull away.  “Jay, huh?” Earl said.  “He looks like a p***y.”

 What the hell do you know about being a man?  “Great, Earl.  What are you still doing here, anyway?”

 “Ah, nothin’.  He was right about one thing, this is stupid.  Seeya ’round, babe.”

 He left finally, and I sat with the encounter playing through my mind.  It kept coming back to Jay’s face when he’d looked at me.  He had looked...  Wounded.  I went to my bedroom and cried with the knowledge that I had inflicted that wound.

----

 When I’d calmed enough to speak, I called Sara.  I knew she was going to scold me, but she couldn’t make me feel worse than I was already making myself.  I dialed her office number.

 “Hey, Laura,” she said as soon as she picked up.

 “Hey,” I said in a voice still weak from crying.

 “What’s up?  Are you alright?” she asked, knowing that voice.

 “Well,” I said, and sniffed.  “Jay um...  He met...  Earl.”

 There was silence.  “Great.  You did tell him about him first, right?”

 “Not exactly...”

 “You mean not at all.”  She sighed in frustration.  “Fine.  What happened?”

 I told her the story, finishing with Jay taking his dog without a backward glance.  “I’m not happy, Sara...”

 “Don’t be,” was all she said.

 “Sara,” I pleaded.

 She got dismissive.  “I’m at work, Laura.  I don’t have time for this.  Damn it!  I warned you!  I warned you so specifically!”

 Her raised voice brought new tears to my eyes.  “I know!  I’m sorry, what else can I say?”

 She sighed again, this time to calm herself.  “Alright...  I won’t yell anymore.  I’m sorry, I’m also worried about Brian still, and it’s got me kind of edgy.  He’s still not back, and hasn’t returned any of my calls.  I’m getting worried that something’s happened to him.  Anyway...  I guess you saw plain enough how badly you hurt Jay.”

 “What can I do?” I choked.

 “There’s not a whole lot to do, is there?  You owe him a groveling apology, but you know that.  Do that I guess, and hope like hell he’s willing to talk about it.  He seemed like a pretty understanding fellow.  Still, Laura.  He didn’t see this coming at all.  You blind-sided him.”

 I gulped.  “Sara...  Do you think...  I deserve forgiveness?”

 “I’m not getting into that,” she said, cross again.  “That is between you and him.”  Her voice lost its edge when she added, “Whatever happens, call me, okay?  I do want to know.”

 “I didn’t mean to hurt him,” I said, really to myself.

 “I know.  But you can’t always follow the path of least resistance, Laura.  That’s how Earl kept his hooks into you in the first place.  I have faith enough to believe you can see that much at least, finally.”

 I took a moment to look inside of myself, so that I could mean it when I said, “Yes.”

 “Talk to him, Laura.  Beg him to talk if you have to.  At the very least, to make sure he knows you aren’t trying to destroy him.”

 A short laugh came through my silent tears.  She hadn’t seen us together since the dinner party, and still she knew how much I meant to him.  “Sara...  Thank you.”

 “Good luck, little sister.  I love you.”

 “I love you too...  And call me if you hear from Brian, alright?”

 She agreed, and we said goodbye.

----

 My stomach knotted so badly it felt like snakes were wrestling in it, as I waited for the afternoon to come.  When it passed two, I knew Jay wasn’t coming back before work.  I tried his cell and it went right to voicemail, but I knew he only kept it on during call.  I didn’t leave a message.  I tried his old number, and it was disconnected.

 Madison got off at the neighbors, and I eventually forced myself to go get her.  “Where’s Mariah?” she asked when we got back.

 “Jay took her.”  Needing someone to confide in still, I added, “I’m afraid Jay’s mad at Mommy.”

 “He’s mad at you?” she asked in disbelief.  “How come?”

 I had to take a moment to put something together.  “Well, the troll came over last night...  Jay wasn’t here when he came, but the troll was still here when he got home.”  I skipped the part about him seeing the troll naked in my bed.  “He thinks I’m friends with the troll, and it made him mad.  Princesses aren’t supposed to make friends with trolls.  Not the mean ones, anyway.”

 “Did you tell him that you’re not?”

 “I didn’t get a chance.  Jay got really sad, and left suddenly.”

 “Oh...”  Madison’s face fell.  “Is he coming back?”

 Good question.  “All of his things are here.  He’d have to come back for them at least, right?”

 Madison lapsed into thought before saying, “Why did he get mad and sad, Mommy?  Was the troll mean to him too?”

 I nodded.  “Very mean.”

 “How come he didn’t use karate?”  Before I had to think of something to say to that, she remembered.  “Oh, fighting is bad.”

 “It sure is,” I sighed mournfully.  “Maddie, do you think Jay would give me a chance to talk to him about it?”

 “Oh yes, Mommy.”

 The certainty I heard in her voice actually lifted my spirits.  Enough to make me smile for the first time that day, in fact.  “What makes you say that?”

 “He loves talking to you!  It’s his favorite thing to do in the whole wide world.  Wanna know how I know that?  He told me.”  Her hand clamped over her mouth, her eyes widened.  “That was supposed to be a secret,” she confessed.

 “I won’t tell,” I said, laughter coming back like an old friend.  “Thanks, Maddie.”

Reviews

[Sarah]

Interesting twist. I had seen this coming, but I didn't see it happening like that. I thought for sure Jay would question Laura immediately. I guess I assumed that he would flip out on Laura, but he did the mature thing and avoided the situation.

I know he'll be back, and I know he'll give Laura a chance. Like Sara said, he is a very understanding guy. Also, I love the little detail about him confiding in Madison. Just a small detail that really tells how much Laura really means to him.

On a side note, I'm curious about Brian and where he fits into this whole story. He's such a minor character, yet his absence makes me wonder. Did he leave Sara? Is this all just a mirror image of Laura, so that Sara can understand how Laura felt this whole time? So many questions.

I'm excited for the next few chapters!

[Christopher Miller]

I hate to admit, I had no plan for Brian as I was writing. It develops and concludes, and might help explain some of Sara's behavior later. Mostly, I think I just wanted to keep her from being a prop. she needed some background, and it went where it went.