Chapter Two

 Hoping the gesture wouldn’t be unwelcome, I patted Jay’s back.  I felt tension almost melt out of him upon contact.  Since he didn’t shrug my hand away I let it rest there, and started caressing him slightly.  “I’m sorry,” he said without lifting his head.  “This isn’t me, it’s just been like this all day.  When I’m not making a stupid mistake from being tired, something like this happens.”

 “It’s alright, I understand,” I said.  “I thought I had a rough night, being up all night with her.”

 “That is a rough night,” he said, and finally stood back up.  “I may have been working the whole time, but at least I wasn’t up all night worrying about my child.”

 “Oh, do you have one?”

 “No…  But I imagine I’d rather be up all night doing x-rays on strangers than worrying about someone I love.”  He sighed.  “This just added a half hour to my day, unless her picture’s still in the system.”  He held the power button on a computer for a few seconds, and it turned off suddenly.  “One way to find out,” he said as he started it booting up again.

 “Why a half hour?”

 “There’s been trouble with the digital rooms lately, so we’ve started documenting every time a patient gets additional exposure just because of equipment failure.”

 “Exposure?”

 “Radiation exposure...  It’s not as scary as it sounds.  A chest x-ray, especially on a child, uses a very small amount.  I’m pretty sure they’re having us do it just to make us miserable.”

 “Oh,” I said.

 “This might be a few minutes, do you want to keep her company?”  He nodded toward Madison.

 I went back into the x-ray room and lifted Madison, setting her in my lap as I sat.  “Doing okay, sweetie?”

 “Mmm-hmm,” she said.  I wondered who was the most tired, of the three of us.  It didn’t matter, I just wanted to finish so we could all go home.  All of us needed some rest.

 “Yes!” Jay said from behind the panel.  He came into the room with a grin.  “First break I’ve had all day.  Madison, we only have one more picture, okay?”

 I stood, setting her down.  Jay turned the apron to cover her side, and right when he spun her to face him, she threw up on his shirt.

 “Oh my god!” I said, rushing in.  I was mortified, especially when I saw a flash of annoyance come over Jay’s face.  “I am so sorry!”

 I was looking at Madison and trying to find some tissues in my purse, so I only heard when he started laughing.  When I looked at him he said, “Ah, I’m sorry.  She just startled me.  Here, I’ll get this young lady a washcloth.”  He addressed Madison, “So, feel any better?”  He only laughed harder when she nodded weakly, but honestly.

 “I am sorry though, what a thing to happen at the end of a day like you’ve had.”

 He took a washcloth from a linen cart and went to the sink.  “I don’t care,” he said as he ran some water over the washcloth.  Seeing how incredulous I was, he added, “I really don’t, honest.  In fact, one of my favorite things about this job is being that guy who doesn’t care.  In a strange way, this is just what I needed.”  He wrung out the cloth, and gave it to me.  He’d waited for the water to get warm, and it felt nice.  “If you really want to make my day, just assume a look of relief and pretend it didn’t happen.”

 I smiled at him as I dabbed at Madison’s mouth.  “Thank you...”  I was sure I did look relieved, and it was not assumed.

 He took off his scrub top, and as his t-shirt lifted I saw a flash of well-defined abdominal muscle.  “Nothing to thank me for...  I do work in the medical field.”  He balled the top up and tossed it into a corner.

 I was stunned.  “I can’t believe you’re taking it so well, though.  I just had a guy glare daggers at us because she broke a jar of sauce in the grocery store.”

 He shrugged, not knowing what to say.  “Okay, Madison.  Ready to try again?  It’s one more picture.”

 “Okay,” she said, and Jay gave her shoulder an encouraging squeeze.  He showed her where to stand, and asked her to put her arms out like the Frankenstein monster.  “What’s that?”

 Jay took in a deep breath, feigning shock.  “You don’t know the Frankenstein monster?”  He looked up at me.  “Mommy, what does this little girl watch?”

 I had to laugh at his easy manner, especially considering how tired he was and what had just happened.  If anything, he seemed more lively because she’d thrown up on him.  “She’ll tell you all about Rapunzel,” I offered.

 “Oh, Rapunzel,” he said to Madison.  “I’ve heard good things about it, is that your favorite movie?”

 Madison actually smiled for the first time that day, and nodded vigorously.

 “Well then, have I got a surprise for you, after the picture.  Mommy’s going to come back with me again...”  That was my cue.  We moved behind the panel together, he had her take a breath in, and took the picture.  “Okay, breathe!”  We came back out, and Jay took the shield off of her.

 “What’s my surprise?” Madison asked.

 “Maddie!” I said in shock, but with a measure of relief to see her so animated again.

 Jay just laughed again.  “I have...”  he opened a cabinet.  “Some Rapunzel stickers!  Would you like some?”

 “Yes!”

 “Maddie, what do you say, at least?” I said with an embarrassed, but amused sigh.

 “Yes, please.”

 He knelt to hand her a bunch of them.  “You were very patient with me,” he told her in a tone that said he was really talking about me.  “So I gave you some extra.”

 “Thank you!”  She jumped in and hugged him, knocking him backward.

 I moved in and pulled her off, glad to see he was only laughing again.  “Alright, my day is officially made.  Thank you, guys.”

 “Thank you,” I said, a little nonplussed at the fact he didn’t seem to remember being thrown up on.  “You were great with her,” I added.

 “She was a great patient,” he said.

 “Well, is she going to be okay?  Did you see anything?”

 “I actually...  Cannot read x-rays.  Pretending I can would cost me my license.”

 “Oh,” I said, unable to hide my disappointment.  Here we were at the waiting game, again.  “Who does read them?”

 “A radiologist will read it sometime tomorrow, then it has to get typed...  Your doctor will get the report later in the day, or the day after.”

 “Two days?”  I felt like screaming, or crying.  I had just wanted the doctor to look at her, and give her medicine.  Now he wouldn’t be doing anything for two more days...

 He saw my displeasure, even though I was trying to keep it to myself.  “You’re welcome to look at them, they’re your daughter’s medical records.”

 “I wouldn’t know what I’m looking at,” I said, and started to leave before he could see me getting depressed.

 A gentle hand on my arm stayed me.  “You seem pretty intelligent, I bet just by looking you could figure out a couple of things.”

 I started to protest again, but when I looked at him his expression somehow made me realize what I’d heard in his tone.  He’s going to help me.  Maddie was content, reviewing her newest acquisitions.  I nodded, and stepped behind the panel again.

 “You know this is Madison,” he pointed to the skeleton.  “And you know above her shoulder is nothing but empty air, right?  So, you know air is black.  You also know what fills your lungs when you breathe in, and that you have two of them.  Right?”

 “Right,” I said, pointing to the two dark shapes.  He saw my eyes linger on a white spot on the left side.

 “Of course, you know what we all have on the left side, but not the right?”

 “Her heart?”  Jay nodded.  I continued to look at that picture.  So now I knew she had a heart and lungs.  But were they okay?  “I still don’t...”  I trailed off.

 “I’ve seen a collapsed lung, once,” he said.  He covered Madison’s right lung with his hand.  “This was all white.”  He removed his hand.  “You can see she’s got two lungs, there’s no unexplained big white blotches...  No grave danger, at least.  Right?”

 “Right,” I said.  “Thank you.”

 “No,” he said quickly, insistently.  “There’s nothing to thank me for.  You figured all that out, all on your own.  Yes?”

 I smiled, taking his meaning.  “Yes.  Thank you for letting me look.”

 “Pneumonia can be very subtle, the doctor may find something,” he reminded me.  “I just didn’t want you walking out of here scared.  She’s sick, she’ll get better.  Kids are tough.”

 It dawned on me that I had been holding him up, when he must have wanted nothing more than to go home at last.  “Thanks for everything,” I said.  “I’ll get out of here so you can go get some much-earned rest.”

 “I’m still a half hour ahead, the way I see it.  Madison’s a walking good luck charm, to have her picture stay in the system like that.  Right, Madison?”

 “Right,” she said, not paying a bit of attention.

 With one last laugh between us, we said goodbye and I led Madison back to the parking garage.

----

 In spite of stopping so Madison could use a bathroom and for me to get a cup of coffee, the cold groceries were still good.  I buckled Madison in, and she was asleep by the time I got to the driver’s seat.

 I had that feeling I always got when a visiting friend left, a sort of emptiness that asked ‘now what?’  Jay’s manner was so easy, I knew I could have stood there talking to him for another hour.  If I were more courageous, I might have asked about seeing him sometime.  Oh well, at least it was a nice encounter, I thought as I pulled out of the parking garage.

 Once we were in the outside lot I saw someone laying on the hood of their car in the distance, their back supported by the windshield.  I drove by slowly, and saw that it was Jay.  He was laying with his arm over his eyes.  I thought about stopping to see if he needed anything, but my shyness won out.

 As soon as I passed him, I regretted it.  I had just been wishing I could talk to him longer, why not take my chance?  After all, from what I’d experienced so far I at least knew he wouldn’t push me away.  I circled back around to him, and rolled my window down.  “Are you alright?”

 I had the impression he knew it was me even before he looked.  He sat up, letting one leg dangle over the side of his car.  “I need a jump,” he sighed, as if it were just another joke the day was playing on him.  “Last time I got called in I hurried, and must not have closed my door all the way.  My light’s been on all day.”  He added with a sad scoff, “Or however long it lasted.”

 “I have cables,” I said.

 He hesitated.  “I was going to get one of the maintenance guys to help me.  I’d hate to keep Madison out of bed any longer than she has to be.”

 I looked back at her.  “She’s asleep, she’ll be fine.  It’s the least I can do.  If it weren’t for you we’d still be waiting anyway, right?”

 He gave a shy grin, feeling something I knew all too well myself.  “Maybe but...  You don’t owe me anything.  I was just doing my job.”

 I’d put my van in park already, and was dragging the cables from the back of the floor.  “Oh, it’ll take five minutes,” I smiled, knowing he couldn’t defeat that argument.

 He popped his hood without saying anything, but he was smiling.  We got the cables hooked to the terminals, and stood outside to talk while I left the van running.  “I’ll feel better knowing I helped you get home to get some sleep.  Besides, I can tell you were dreading the thought of going back in there.”

 He laughed.  “You’re right about that last bit.  Hate to tell you though, I’m dreading going home just as much.  That’s why you found me in that lil’ stalemate there.”

 “Why would you dread going home?”

 He sank against his car with a sigh.  “I haven’t had an honest night’s sleep in about three months.  I’m renting the upper floor of a duplex.  I don’t know what drugs they enjoy downstairs, but at any hour of the day I’ll hear this woman screaming at her kid, doors slamming, people yelling in the stairwell, you name it.”

 “That’s awful!”

 He continued, staring into nothing.  “Two in the afternoon, two in the morning, it never matters to them.  I’m making mistakes that I’d never make, just because I can’t get any sleep.  I’m starting to fear for my job.  I’m an underdog as it is, they’d be happy to swap me with a fresh grad.”

 “What are you going to do?”

 He shrugged.  “I would look for a new place...  But I’m so tired all the time.”

 “But you can’t go on like this, right?”

 He folded his arms over his chest and looked at the pavement in front of him.  “I guess not.  I think last night was meant to show me that.  An evening shift, a night of call, and a day shift all in a row...  Even a year ago I could have handled something like that, but this time I really feel like it’s doing me in.”  There was a waver in his voice that lent truth to his words.

 I started to reach a hand out toward him, but lost my nerve.  Instead I said, “There’s your answer then.  I hope you’ll look for another place...”

 He gave a resigned nod.  “I might be tired, but I’m only getting more tired as time goes on.  You’re right.”

 I blushed to realize I was giving a complete stranger some very personal advice.  “Want to give it a go?” I asked, to change the subject.

 He sat halfway in his car, and I heard the engine come to life.  “Wonderful...” he said with an exhausted smile.  “I don’t know how to thank you.”

 When he handed me his end of the cables, I smiled and found the courage to rub his arm, thrilling at the contact.  “No thanks necessary.  You’re a very nice man, it was my pleasure.  I hope the best for you.”

 I felt his eyes on me as I threw the cables into the side door and came back around to the driver’s side.  “Could I ask your name?” he asked once I was in the driver’s seat again, the window still down.

 “Oh, I’m sorry!  It’s Laura.”

 “Laura...  I’ll remember that,” he said in a way that told me he usually would not.

 “Why’s that?”

 “You’re really nice yourself.  I meant it earlier when I said you two made my day.  Even aside from your daughter making me laugh, and you taking time out of your day to help me, I think it’s the fact that you don’t look at me as ‘the x-ray tech’ like everyone else tends to.”

 I was surprised he’d notice any ‘way’ I was looking at him at all.  “Then how do I look at you?”

 He shrugged, and looked away.  “Can’t say, I guess, but it feels like you just see me as a guy having a hard day.”  I felt like he’d paid me a big compliment, with the way he said it.  He shrugged again with a nervous smile.  “Never mind, I tend to get overly sensitive to things when I’m tired.  Laura, thanks again, and it was nice meeting you.”

 It crossed my mind again to ask about seeing him sometime.  However, this time my shyness won out with no second chances, and all I said was, “Nice meeting you, too.”

Author's Note

A specific question on this one: Toward the end, is Jay too open to Laura about his living situation? Is it understandable given what's been explained so far? What impression does it leave you with?

Reviews

[Sarah]

I'm curious as to why Jay helps the woman with her child's xrays. I know he's worried about the child for the mother's sake, but it still seems somewhat risky since the two just met, and he knows it could cost him his job. There seems to be a level of trust forming between them at such an early stage in the novel that makes me wonder more about where this will go. I do find it a bit strange that he opens up to her about his personal matters right off the bat, but it could just be the drowsiness talking. I also find it peculiar at the end when Jay says, I'll remember that, but Laura continues the conversation not once, but twice when she could've left it be. She's definitely intrigued and overcame some form of shyness there. I'm curious if Jay is feeling the same way Laura does, or if he is just being polite. There hasn't really been any clear sign of his feelings. No touches, no advances, nothing. I guess I'll just have to keep reading to find out.

[kgirl]

Still liking the story but I SO agree with the people who said that this was too personal too soon. I get that they got along, but to me it feels that it was all too fast. I even sort of expected that she invited him to crash at her couch, and I don't feel I should expect that.
The thing with the technician reading the xray when he was not supposed to, it's not that big of a deal in my opinion. My dad is a xray technician and he does it quite often.
Nevertheless, I still think it's very well written and the story it's still interesting.

[Christopher Miller]

Every opinion on that is helping, so thank you. I've said before, I'm glad I found this site to get some feedback before publishing this one. I only had a handful of people to help with Lavender, and most of them said they were too engrossed in reading it to look for mistakes. Which is nice (amazing, really) to hear, but not as technically helpful. I can't really change it, it's too built into the story and its pacing, but I will introduce some self-awareness on Jay's part when I do my next edits (one of these days...).
I might make clearer, perhaps during her talks with her sister, that he legally didn't read the x-ray. He could argue that she drew her own conclusions, if it came right down to it. But, he had a feeling that it wouldn't.

[Jennie Lynn]

"I was sure I did look relieved, and it was not assumed." felt odd in it's wording. I had to read it twice. I know what was being conveyed, that she didn't have to feign the relief, it just didn't sound right in my head.

I don't think that him reading the x-rays or hinting at their meaning was unusual at all. I've had several x-ray techs, radiologists, ultra sound techs, etc. let me know what a result was long before a doctor saw them, esp in serious situations. They always whisper it or are subtle about it. The whole interaction rang true to me.

I agree with the previous reviewer that him revealing such personal information so soon came across as a bit odd. Maybe just a simple reference of her noticing that it was a bit TMI but not caring or him laughing at himself for talking so much? The whole conversation for me didn't flow as naturally as the dialogue in the last chapter.

I got the sense that he was attracted to her as well, just more guarded about it.

[Christopher Miller]

Thanks for the notes. I might look at changing some of the syntax there, though I do want to keep the words since they're referencing the previous paragraph.
In my mind, he's so open about his life because he needs to vent about his situation, because due do his exhaustion he does not have a 'filter' in place, to show that he is comfortable around her, and to hint at his attraction to her. 2/2 people reading this so far agree that could use some explanation; that's very useful to me, and something I never would have thought of. I will put some thought into adding something. Perhaps some sudden self-awareness comes to him and he apologizes. There's some potential there.