Promises

9-18-07

you promised to love me

you promised to stay true

you promised to remain

you promised to say "I do"

you promised we'd be happy

you promised me the moon

you promised me forever

and forever came too soon

he has kept your promises

he made your lies come true

HE has made me happy

he kept your promises for you

Reviews

[[untitled]]

Wow! At first, you think this is a very simple poem, but after you read it, you get the idea it's not. You think you've found the right person, but you're wrong. But it doesn't mean everything's over, and a new person comes into your life... the one that will actually do all that. For advice... I can't think of much. The length didn't really interfer with anything, but making it just a bit longer could possibly help. I liked the poem... a whole lot.

[alyssa]

i agree!! sometimes it dosen't always work out... but that dosen't mean your life is over!! I LOVE IT!!

[Jerbear The Great]

short sweet and to the point. who knew that such a small poem could pack such a powerful punch. Bravo. Your writing betrays your plentiful talent. I'm glad to see its being put to good use. Keep up the good work.

[Phill Oz O'fee]

A promise brings an expectation and anticipation of reward, albeit aesthetic or otherwise. Broken promises leaves in there wake, the flotsam of shattered dreams.

Beautifully composed and creative composition!

God's Blessing
Phillozofee

[shadadakiya]

very true in alot of our life great write

[J]

Oh! Wonderfully subtle message of heartache softened and made bearable by faith.

Well done, Carrie! You have an uncanny talent for smooth rhyme and cadence. Thank you for sharing!

j