THE PAST

so lil I know. :)

Blianita awakes suddenly. Her eyes opened so wide as she sit on her bed. It's like her head pound once. She hold her head as she tries to remember everything that happened.

It hits her. Blianita opened her eyes wide and quickly ran downstairs.

"Oh! goodness gracious you, Blinita. Why the hurry?" Rina said as Blianita almost hit her on the stairs.

"Oh I'm sorry Rina. I just- I need you to know something." Blianita said pulling Rina's hand and let her sit on the couch.

"Like how you got home late?" Rina asked.

"No, It's about fire and- late? What do you mean late?" Blianita look confused.

"It was past 6 pm and your still not home so I called Cleah. She told me you're on your way home already. I decided to wait for a few more minutes and maybe I fell asleep waiting. The next thing I know, you're running downstairs." Rina explained.

"I don't know. I just- I just remember fire and almost being-" Blianita was stopped by Rina holding her arm.

"Maybe you're just so tired. I saw your bicycle outside and it had a flat tire. Maybe you're tired walking." Rina said.

"No, there is more to that Rina. I made fire in my hand. I had powers. My clothes its- its on fire like-". Blianita stopped when she noticed Rina's eyes which are emotionless.

"You still don't believe me, do you?" Blianita bowed her head in defeat.

Rina pushed Blianita's chin upwards to meet the hopeless glare. "I always believe in you. That is why I took you out on that orphanage".

"Why me?" Blianitas tears almost fall out remembering her childhood in the orphanage.

"I was walking on the the street to buy some vegetables for the orphanage that day. I heard a cry on the corner and saw a baby on a basket. It was you. You look so innocent and sweet. I took you to the orphanage knowing you will be better." Rina explained.

"I was never better. They always bullied me. The nuns always punished me for talking nonsense. Others made fun out of me when I share about my dreams. Nobody wanted to adopt me." Blianita said with tears on her eyes.

"That's why I took you. I give up my vows as a nun and decided to take care of you. I see potentials in you, Blianita. You are a wonder." Rina said smiling.

"Thank you so much Rina. Sometimes I felt like you are a biological sister. I wonder what my parents reasons are for leaving me behind." Blianita said while wiping her tears.

"Now, now. Don't think of that anymore or it will make you sad again. It's your parent's lost for leaving such a great child. I will cook your favorite sunny side up now so that you could eat breakfast." Rina stood up and walk towards the kitchen.

"Don't forget to not put salt on it". Blianita said with a smile.

"Okay"...

Blianita took the remote control on the couch and turned on the television.

BREAKING NEWS

Reporter: A body of a man found burned.

(The man's face was focused)

The man is identified to be Leo an alleged serial rapist.

His body is now being taken to the...

Blianita turned off the television.

Blianita's movement was on hold. Her heart beating fast. "That- That man. It's true." Blianita turned her head towards Rina who is happily cooking. 

'I can't tell her. She wouldn't believe me still. I need to tell Cleah.'

"Rina, I got to go now. Just keep that egg till I get back." Blianita said while running towards the door.

"Not again, you-" Rina did not continue since Blianita already went out.

Reviews

[matrixmark]

Been a while since I last picked up this story. But what I saw IMMEDIATELY was how much you have improved with the tightness of your sentences.

Here are just a few things.
Change this - Her eyes opened so wide as she sit on her bed.
To this - Her eyes opened so wide as she sat up on her bed.
Change this - She hold her head as she tries to remember everything that happened.
To this - She held her head as she tried to remember everything that happened. And then it hit her, and she quickly ran downstairs.

The reason for the changes is because you mentioned twice that her eyes had opened widely. Secondly, it flows better with the adjustments.

Change this - Blianita said pulling Rina's hand and let her sit on the couch.
To this - Blianita said whilst pulling Rina's hand and sitting her down on the couch.

Change this - The man is identified to be Leo an alleged serial rapist.
To this - The body has been identified as alledged serial rapist - Leo.

Also in the above changes, give Leo a surname. It makes it sound more official.

As I have said at the beginning, you have definately improved. The errors are nothing serious and I am sure that you will overcome them. This chapter felt very fast moving, sharp and fascinating to read. I shall be reading more, as and when time permits.

Mark.

[Surya]

girl power haan, getting interested, .....still, like to hear more about Blinita..
I liked it, as always..:)

[Paul Bell]

That girl has power, but power for the good. Don't know how far you can take her, but will keep following to find out.

[Joey Nizz]

woohhh this chapter is really interesting!
And like everybody else who read this, Im also waiting and anticipating what happens in the next one!

[wordman]

it is getting more interesting with each chapter

[Sinbulvinter]

I feel very sympathetic towards Blinita, and this chapter really brought that out in me - which is saying something since I normally don't feel sympathetic or like female main characters.
I like her a lot, her character is very indepth and strong, been through a lot and that makes her even stronger of a person.
I'm liking this story a lot, a few spelling errors here and there, but the storytelling and dialogue is very well done. Keep sending me read requests! I will surely keep reading!

[Hope]

I so like Blinita.:)
Waiting for sequel.......

[Farhan Shaikh]

Wowieee...i am curious to know what will happen next...wonderful work

[Sikandar Khan]

When Will Next Come......?

[CAPOLAVORO]

Soon. ;) I will try to finish it up as fast as possible. :)