Asylum

More experimental, mixed with complete exhaustion.

A deep slumber has been disturbed,

Fingering viciously at my sanity, clawing away

And tearing the soul to pieces, like bits of paper

Blowing softly within the dusty winds.

 

The silence screams and echoes

Though the open dark hallways, muttering songs

Demonic voices, dancing with every thought

Rapid beating of the heart, as it races to finish line.

 

Restrained in the madness

Of all emotions consumed of tormented fury

As my own nightmares breathe a life of their own

Living in the realms of humanity's eye.

 

Needles and blades of experimentation

A crazy attempt to calm my nerves,

That once upon a time was made of stone

Crushing at my skin and bones, bleeding out the source.

 

In the land of disturbia, light flashes behind glaring eyes

Peering from the shadows of the midnight

Causing a battle of bloody wars that could silently kill

My mind as it falls gracefully into a fit of rage.

 

Thoughts spiraling out of control

There must be a method to this madness

In a dragon's breath of fire breathing down my neck

Memories scream in laughter of my own asylum.

Reviews

[Kaine]

There's a sense of panic and in this, I think, which suits it very well. There seems to be a clear contrast between the sane and the insane - like recognizing one's own madness, I suppose; being mad, but still being able to make the distinction. Also, it seems almost contagious, like a disease spreading within. I imagine this as the very last thoughts someone could think before completely loosing their mind to insanity.
I have a predilection for madness in most cases, and so I like the feeling of urgency and chaos in this poem. The impending madness.

[LilMissWriter17]

Wow...this is a very, very deep poem. Very intense...just woww!

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Restrained in the madness
Of all emotions consumed of tormented fury
As my own nightmares breathe a life of their own
Living in the realms of humanity's eye.

Our own mind can be our worst enemy when it begins to think too much which develops to many life conspiracies.
Very intense read.

[tk]

wow. insanity overcasting the rational side of humanity.. i loved the imagery of this and how each line flows effortlessly beautiful. it's especially haunting, and the feeling of confusion, darkness and madness is overwhelming. i loved this stanza the most:

"In the land of disturbia, light flashes behind glaring eyes
Peering from the shadows of the midnight
Causing a battle of bloody wars that could silently kill
My mind as it falls gracefully into a fit of rage."

wonderfully crafted! thanks for sharing..
♥♥♥

[NoneOfYourBusiness akaK..]

the pitch screams~ the images slice and dice beautifully~ penetrating the deep recesses of of the cortex~

[Cascara (aka Sprint Goe..]

oooooooohhh...
neat descriptions!

[A Soap Mess Stories]

Somehow I could relate to this piece...good job.

[~ Stefanie ~]

I felt the anger and panic portrayed in this piece. It was elegantly written and flowed well. I enjoyed reading this and I could easily picture the character in this piece struggling with despair. You did a great job!

[Lily Mae]

I feel like disappointment has finally come to a head.. Anger spirals us out of control with thoughts of rage and anger and we do feel the dragons's breath.. So I think you did a great job describing a moment of frustration... :) love it..xx

[Raven Starhawk]

Exquisite words penned beautifully. I found this to be amazingly detailed and inspiring.